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Downing The Aggies, OSUs Gundy Wins His 40th; He's 40, That's Right: 40

Stan Silliman
Sep 30, 2010

A last second field goal wins for Mike Gundy and his OSU Cowboys. This is his 40th career victory.

Significant number - 40? You bet it is. Just ask Daily Oklahoman reporter Jenni Carlson. She remembers being told Mike Gundy was 40 year's old and that he was a MAN!

Who told her that? Mike himself, during a press conference in September of 2007, when he was videoed which soon became an internet viral event: "I'm a man! I'm 40!"

You know who else was 40? Forrest Gump.

You know what Forrest Gump wanted to be? A football coach.

You know the name of Forrest Gump's girlfriend? Jenni.

Let's pretend the locker room scene wasn't between Gundy and Jenni, but rather, Gump and Jenni.

Here's how it might have gone down:

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  Gump and Jenni ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni, I may not be a smart manโ€ฆ but I know what love is.โ€

ย ย ย  โ€œBut I saw your quarterback eating chicken.โ€

ย ย ย  โ€œChicken? Jenni?! Are you sure it was chickenโ€ฆ and not shrimp? We feed all our players Bubba Gump Shrimp. Jenni, do you how many ways you can prepare shrimp?โ€

ย ย ย  โ€œNo, his mother was feeding him chickenโ€ฆ from a box.โ€
ย ย ย 
ย ย ย  โ€œJenni, my mother always said a football team is likeโ€ฆ a boxโ€ฆ of chocolates.โ€
ย ย ย  โ€œIs it because some of your players are nuts?โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œNo, Jenni, itโ€™s because mostโ€ฆ of themโ€ฆ are black.โ€
ย ย ย 
ย ย ย  โ€œYou yelled at me the other day.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œI know, Jenni. I yelled because I was telling you about the garbage.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œGarbage? Yes, I heard you say GARBAGE!โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย  โ€œWell, they hadnโ€™t picked it up, Jenni. They hadnโ€™t picked it up.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œBut you embarrassed me in front of my co-workers.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni, if there is garbage, you need know about it.โ€
ย ย ย 
ย ย ย  โ€œI swear, Gump, sometimes you act just like a little kid.โ€
ย ย ย  โ€œJenni! You know better. Iโ€™m a man.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œAre you doing this again?โ€
ย ย ย  โ€œJenni! Iโ€™m a man. Iโ€™m forty.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย  โ€œSo youโ€™re going out with the other coaches? What if you donโ€™t get a ride home?โ€
ย ย ย  โ€œYou can come after me. Iโ€™m a man.โ€
Gump and Jenni by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articlesย ย ย 
ย ย ย  โ€œYou are yelling again, Gump. You know how that makes me feel. Itโ€™s offensive. When you yell, it the worldโ€™s greatest offense. So will you stop yelling?โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni, I donโ€™t have to.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œBut, at least you can tell me why you are yelling.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni. Jenni, I donโ€™t have to.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œBut I need to know whatโ€™s wrong, what you think is wrong.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni, I donโ€™t have to. Iโ€™m a man. Iโ€™m forty.โ€

ย ย ย  โ€œGump, do I need Lt. Dan to kick your butt?โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni!! You know Dan canโ€™t kick. He got no legs and you should know somebody from Danโ€™s family had fought and died in every single American war. He had a lot to live up to.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œWell, I still donโ€™t like you yelling at meโ€ฆ yelling at me in front of my peers.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œI had to tell you โ€˜bout the garbage. It was GARBAGE, Jenni.โ€

ย ย ย  โ€œAnd I suppose you are going to say โ€˜youโ€™re a manโ€™ again.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œJenni? You know if I see garbage, it almost makes me puke.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย  โ€œOhโ€ฆ. Gump. You know I canโ€™t stay mad at you.โ€
ย ย ย 

ย ย ย ย  โ€œOhโ€ฆ. Jenni.โ€