Notre Dame Recruiting: A Poem

Notre Dame is on a mission, spending dime on worthy cases

Building blocks to further goals, a campus littered with new faces

Some decide and some do not, making friends and signing balls

Others leave for family reasons, turning down our coaches’ calls

Five-star, four-star, three-star rankings, cattle herded in big cities

One by one a hat is worn, causing chaos with great pity

He said she said they said yes, but he chose to go here instead

Liar, liar pants on fire, you said he’d be in South Bend

We still are weak at this position, won’t he get one more for this?

I can’t believe he offered this guy, his 40 time isn’t worth the risk

Can he kick it out of here, and can he catch a bubble screen?

He looks to stiff to run a straight line, why’s he smiling, isn’t he mean?

And what about this guy’s MySpace profile, shows he can’t be trusted right?

Stacks of money, alcohol pouring, I never did that high school nights

Overbearing we’re all to blame,

While watching film of a high school game

Can’t we hold kids at one level and not act the professional way?

Soon we’re going to realize that it has, trickled on down to our own kids' play

Football’s almost here to end this, speculative talk on this guy’s choice

I can’t wait for this to happen, soon forgetting all this noise