The Detroit Lions New Motivational Coach: R. Lee Ermy

The Detroit Lions have brought in a new motivational coach. Now sit back and channel Full Metal jacket. R. Lee Ermy’s motivational speech to the defense:

“Follett!  I’m talking to you, maggot! Get your sorry ass over here! Dig, dig, dig! Now, drop and give me 20 while I give you a Marine Corps come to Jesus meeting!” ONE...TWO...TWO...

“I’m calling you out, Follett! What in the hell is going on between the lines? Are your cleats stuck in the turf? Do you need GPS to find a receiver? Are you some mamby pamby bit of fluff?” THREE . . . THREE . . .

“Oh sure, you are quite the little social networking butterfly, aren’t you, Follett? Tweeting this, tweeting that.” FOUR...FIVE...FIVE...FIVE...

“Follett! Sounds like some kind of bird! Are you a bird, Follett? I think that with all of that tweeting maybe you are a bird! Big Bird! Running around like a chicken with your effing head cut off!” SIX...SIX...SEVEN...

“Dennis freakin Dixon? You didn’t make me forget Wayne Walker on that play, Big Bird!” EIGHT...NINE...NINE...

“Then there was that Lance Ball maggot in Denver! Lance? You let a guy named Lance torch you, Follett?” 10...11...12...

“Get outa my sight, Big Bird! You make me and your mama sick!”

“King! Eric freaking King! Front and center! Now, maggot! You call yourself a cornerback? Kyle Freaking Orton beat you like a mule! Hell, I coulda beat you like a bucked tooth, red headed step child! Horrible!”

“Now hear this, King Rat! You get out there and hit somebody! I don’t care who! Hit anything that moves, then hit them again! Here! Take my brass knuckles! Go practice on Follett over there!”

“King, if you have another game like Denver, I will personally frog march you to the bus stop! Got that? Now go hit the film room! I don’t want to see you come out of that film room until Friday!”

“The rest of you clowns are dismissed! The Senior Drill Instructor’s gotta go give that offense a little motivation.”

There’s nothing like a little motivation, Marine Corps style, to get the players properly tuned up.