Tiger Woods and the Top 10 Athletes To Keep Your Daughter Away From

Greg RiotAnalyst IApril 8, 2010

Tiger Woods and the Top 10 Athletes To Keep Your Daughter Away From

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Richard Seigler

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Ben Roethlisberger

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Shawn Kemp

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Darren McFadden

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Alex Rodriguez

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Tiger Woods

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    Just when Tiger was moving on, letting Jesse James take all his heat, and returning to the PGA Tour, out comes his kind-of-chubby neighbor, Raychel Coudriet. I don’t know what bugs me more about this. The fact that she has a “Y” in her name for no damn good reason, or the fact that she apparently decided to wait a good four months since this whole thing started to unfold to tell the world that she’d had an affair with Tiger.

    Whether she’s a real whore, or an attention whore, the fact is that she’s missed the boat. The idea that this girl lives right next door to Tiger’s family and has been plotting the timed release of this story is creepier than Tiger having sex with a 22-year old idiot.

    In any case, people are less concerned with Tiger Woods’ infidelity than they are with this kind of tabloid stuff anymore. Tiger has 5/1 odds of winning The Masters at Augusta National, and people are more concerned about his return to golf than they are about his alleged mistresses. That time has come and gone. I’ll give Raychel with a “Y” about +10000 odds of being an actual mistress and -500 odds she’s just an attention craving lunatic.

Calvin Murphy

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Mark Chmura

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    Mark Chmura is known as much for being a Green Bay Packers tight-end as for chasing 17-year old tight ends in a high school party hot tub. At a post-prom party in 2000, Chmura did something…what’s the word…”unsanitary” with the underage babysitter of his children. I can’t even comprehend what a 30-year old professional football player would even think by going to a high school party. Had this guy never seen that scene with Tweeter in Varsity Blues?

    He admitted that his play-action at the high school party “wasn’t something a married man should do”. We can all learn a lesson here. It doesn’t matter if you’re married or single. If you consider yourself a “man”, then stay the hell away from high school parties. I for one know that when my kids are throwing parties, I am getting the hell out of there.

    This isn’t even my favorite part of the whole story. Chmura was released from the Packers despite being an integral part of the Super Bowl XXXI championship team. After his release, no team would go anywhere near him as if he were – ahem – an underage high school girl. So where does he work? For the law firm that represented him during the trial. I’m sure there’s a “scumbag taking scumbags under their wing” but I’m pretty sure that Chmura wasn’t able to afford his legal bills. It’s like if you can’t pay your bill at a restaurant so you wash dishes for a while until the tab is cleared. Except when it’s a law firm, the “dishes” are “research documents” and the tab is probably a lot more expensive than a veal parmesan.

Karl Malone

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Tiki Barber

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