Tiger Woods' New Endorsements: A Satirical Look

Andrew Bock@andrew_bockCorrespondent IFebruary 23, 2010

Now that Tiger Woods has confronted a national audience and told us all to leave him alone, it’s time for him to move forward, reestablish his brand, and start considering which sponsors he will add to his repertoire.

While, it is true, that Tiger was dropped by such companies as Accenture and AT&T, he should not let this discourage him, as there are many more companies out there that are natural fits for Mr. Woods. 

He'll be back on the links soon enough, so he'll want to make the most of his time, recouping that extra $50 million a year he's missing out on.  Below are two ideas.

Smuckers Jam:

This is a great product for Tiger to endorse because of the possible taglines.

“It’s the Jam you don’t want to get out of.”

“Great on toast and in bed.”

Plus it would really help Smuckers tap into the adult market for a product, typically thought of to be a popular children’s food. 

Now kids and cheating spouses, alike, can enjoy the benefits of America’s favorite jam.

Tiger Balm:

Let’s face it.  When you’re out in the world banging cocktail waitresses and porn stars, in between tournaments, eventually you’re going to wear yourself down. 

Now, if Tiger was with male cocktail waiters and male porn stars, he’d reach for a tube of Ben Gay.  But, he’s a player with the ladies, so that requires something else, Tiger Balm.

“Tiger balm.  It’s what I use after a long night of 18 holes.”

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