The Real Conversation Between Nnamdi Asomugha and Darrelle Revis (Satire)

Here is the conversation that went on between Revis and Asomugha:

Nnamdi Asomugha: Look, Darrell this is hard for me to say. I want to take this relationship to the next level. I feel like we were meant to be together. I know you feel the same. That is why I'd like to propose to you. I want us to be together forever. So, If you say yes, I'd like to have Rex walk me down the aisle. 

Darrelle Revis: (tearing up) That was the greatest thing anyone has ever told me. 

NA: The problem is is that we may have to wait until 2013 to hit it off.

DR: I'm not sure I can wait for you. 

NA: But I know you can, Darrell. I'd like to ask you now anyway. Will you be my teammate forever and ever?

DR: Ahhhh. How sweet. I just don't think I can commit to a long distance relationship for that long.

NA: What if I put in a good word with the big man. I can convince him to let us face the Jets this season.

DR: I doubt Roger Goodell will do that for us. 

NA: You might be right, but I will at least try. For us, you know.

DR: Just stop pretending Nami-poo. This isn't gonna work. I'm afraid we will have to say goodbye. Everything started getting awkward when you said we should have a competition to see whose a better shutdown corner. I think I won, by the way.

NA: Regardless, I guess this is a goodbye until next Pro Bowl. 

DR: Nami-poo, I promise I won't ever forget you...