NFL: Liver's Week 14 Picks

Heart…still fluttering…after Texas/Nebraska. What a disaster that could’ve been. And for all those Texas haters out there, THERE WAS A SECOND LEFT ON THE CLOCK so get over it. Check the replay if you don't believe it.

At least ONE of The Liver’s football teams is playing for a championship this season.

I don’t what’s happened the last two weeks but The Liver’s picks have fallen off a bit. I have been on a bad vodka kick though. Maybe I should switch back to whiskey with Shiner Bock chasers.

This week has more "could go either way" games then any week so far this season.

Of course it goes without saying that the following picks AGAINST THE SPREAD are for RECREATIONAL USE ONLY . Only Rick Pitino, LeGarrette Blount, Donte’ Stallworth, Braylon Edwards, Bob Griese, Miguel Cabrera, Tila Tequila, Bill Belichick, Steve Phillips, Travis Henry, Serena Williams, Michael Jordan, Tony Romo, Elizabeth Lambert, Tiger Woods, Richard Heene (a.k.a. Balloon Boy’s father), the Liver’s biological father (a.k.a. The Most Interesting Man in the World) and all Somali Pirates would be drunk enough to question the Esteemed Liver's picks.

Last week’s record: 7-9

2009 record against the spread: 113-77-2 (.594) 


Sunday, Dec. 13

Denver at Indianapolis (-7)

I’m not buying the “Denver’s back” bit yet. I’ve been picking against Indy for three straight weeks and have been burned each time. Pick: Indy

Cincinnati at Minnesota (-7)

Tell me if this sounds familiar: Ochocinco got fined $30 grand for wearing a sombrero and a cape on the sidelines after a TD last week against the Lions.

Looks like the real Brett Favre might be back. I mean the one that throws picks in December games. These are the types of games that the Bengals get up for.

Then again, the Bengals have had trouble scoring 20 plus points in the majority of their games this year. They’d need to be able to score at least mid 20s to low 30s to be able to win in Minnesota.

Minnesota’s defense has been slipping lately and will be hard pressed to stop the Bengals running game which averages 34 attempts per game. Pick: Cincinnati

N.Y. Jets at Tampa Bay (+4 ½)

Thank you Josh Freeman for those five picks last week against Carolina. Really appreciate ya. No Sanchize here which means Kellen Clemens for the Jets. I still hate this game and this line. Pick: Tampa Bay

Buffalo at Kansas City (PK)

Thank you Chiefs for giving me false hope the last two weeks and costing me dearly. You still suck. TOUGH PICK . Talk about a pick em that could stump Ace Rothstein. Pick: Buffalo

Green Bay at Chicago (+3)

Green Bay has looked good ever since that season saving win against the Cowboys. Why is it that Dallas is the favorite team for OTHER desperate teams to play? Pick: Green Bay

New Orleans at Atlanta (+9 ½)

Looks like New Orleans is getting EVERY kind of a questionable to downright sketchy call imaginable to keep them on a 16-0 pace. That OT against the Redskins just made it more vivid.

I think I’m rooting against them now just because it seems that everyone else is rooting for them. Even if Matt Ryan plays, which is doubtful, he’s going to be in extreme pain due to his turf toe on his plant foot.

His status for the game is dependent on the availability of RG Harvey Dahl (ankle) and LT Sam Baker (elbow) who were both out of last week’s blowout loss against Filthy. Pick: New Orleans

Detroit at Baltimore (-13)

What was it I said about Joe Flacco? He’s getting worse each week. No Matthew Stafford here which means Daunte Culpepper time. This entire Lions team is just beat the hell up.

Do you ever have that one game where the line is just insanely too high but it still whispers hypnotically to you, ''LAY IT BABY. LAY IT .'' Then I wake up and see Joe Pesci in front of me demanding "Where's the f**king money?"

The Ravens should beat the hell out of Detroit right? With Pittsburgh having blown their playoff spot, Baltimore is in prime shape to move up. See how I can rationalize ANYTHING ? Pick: Baltimore

Miami at Jacksonville (-3)

Tough one to call here. Both teams have LOOSE playoff hopes and in many ways are mirror images of each other particularly in the run game. They’re also both the definition of inconsistent. Pick: Miami

Carolina at New England (-14)

WAY TOO HIGH HERE . This isn’t the New England Patriots that you’ve seen in the past. Any hopes you might have had about them was disintegrated after last week’s loss to Miami.

Belichick is quickly evaporating his “genius” label as each week passes.

There is a chance of a run-up-the score Belichick special here but given what we’ve seen of them the last three weeks, are you willing to gamble on that? Plus, Carolina can run the ball which is something the Patriots can’t stop. Pick: Carolina

Seattle at Houston (-7)

Six is high for this Houston team but Seattle is garbage on the road. Then again, Houston is just garbage, as has been evidenced the last few weeks. Matt Schaub has an injured shoulder and Steve Slaton just got put on IR along with Owen Daniels.   Pick: Seattle

St. Louis at Tennessee (-13)

So the magical run is over for the Titans it seems. They’re not making the playoffs but they should still win here. This should be fun if for nothing else then to see two of the game’s great running backs in Steven Jackson and Chris Johnson. Pick: St. Louis

Washington at Oakland (+1)

VERY TOUGH ONE TO CALL HERE . The Redskins actually made a good personnel move over the week; they cut kicker Shaun Suisham. Note to NFL teams: Never pick up former Cowboys kickers. They were cut FOR A REASON .

That’s why you don’t see Mike Vanderjagt around. Painful to watch the Redskins give that game away to the Saints.

So Bruce Gradkowski is a world beater compared to JaMarcus Russell? Both teams are bad but have shown some resilience the last few weeks when they could have folded up shop and quit. Pick: Oakland

San Diego at Dallas (-3)

I’m losing my mind with this team. They had the Giants down 10-0 and on the ropes but couldn’t put them away. YOU CAN’T TACKLE A FAT BASTARD LIKE BRANDON JACOBS as he tiptoes down the sidelines for a score?

Just to make matters worse, The Liver had to watch the game with a bunch of f***ing Giants fans WHO HAD ALREADY THROWN IN THE TOWEL BEFORE KICKOFF .

The Cowboys are officially the team that OTHER desperate teams want to play. Just ask Green Bay who hasn't lost since beating the hell out of the Cowboys in Lambeau back in Week 10.
 
I can’t trust them right now until they win a game like this one here against a Chargers team that, although they’ve been playing inferior talent lately, has been playing as well as any team in the NFL.

Here’s an interesting stat: Philip Rivers is 15-0 in December. Tony Romo is 5-10. Who are you going to take? In Romo’s defense, he was one of the few bright spots in the loss against the Giants. Still, the Cowboys are LAYING THREE ?

Flozell Adams is an embarrassment to the Cowboys. It’s bad enough with his expected minimum one to two false starts EVERY game. He’s not the most penalized player in the NFL over the last three years for nothing.

But to see him taking a cheap shot like that against Justin Tuck made me sick. Please GOD , let him be purged from this team after they go down in their inevitable ball of December and January hellfire.

Wade Phillips continues to be one of the worst (if not THE worst) coach when it comes to big games on the road. And he had the balls to get defensive when asked about his team’s lack of production this time of year?

I’m now rooting against the Cowboys the rest of the season because that might be the only way Wade gets fired. If they make the playoffs and get beat in the wild card that might be enough of an excuse for Jerry to keep him.

This team needs to flame out like it did last season. But what the hell, at least the Longhorns are playing for a national championship. Pick: San Diego

Philadelphia at N.Y. Giants (PK)

I don’t know who to root for as a gambler first and a Cowboys fan second. I hate both of these teams and wish there would be no winner.

That said, the Cowboys may have given this Giants team some swagger back and they’re aware that every game for them right now is a playoff game. Heavy playoff implications are at stake in this one. Pick: Filthy

Monday, Dec. 14

Arizona at San Francisco (+3)

Arizona has been the quintessential road team this season and look to seal up the crappy NFC West division.

They’re looking awfully good on both sides of the ball right now. San Francisco can’t keep up with that offense and lost any playoff hopes they might have had with that loss against Seattle. Pick: Arizona