Rampage: Dinner With Grandma Dee Is Off the Table!

Rampage, I am sorry, but I am retracting my invitation to you to join me and my family for a home fried chicken dinner with all the trimmings.

Now I hate fickle people and I tried through all your trials to stick with you and defend you to the best of my ability, which is mainly by slinging words, not punches, but you have been crossed off my "dinner with the Willis gang" list.

Why, you may ask? Well, naturally, that is why I am writing this article, to explain the situation to you (and any readers on Bleacher Report, of course).

Seeing you constantly in the company of Dana White after you "rampage while driving" incident did bother me. I was not jealous of the time spent with that other DW, I was concerned that his "ways" would somehow rub off on you. To my opinion, as a trained observer of human behavior, they have rubbed off on and tainted you.

Dana is what I consider to be an opportunist who uses situations to promote himself and his "projects." In some cases it involves stirring up interest in his UFC events, in others it is in hyping TUF. I find very little truth in these instances, and now I am doubting your veracity as well as Dana's.

It appears to me that "your brief exile from the UFC" served more than one purpose for you. First, it publicised your role in the A Team movie, second, it stirred up your fans who longed to see you fight Rashad, and third, it may have given you a fighting advantage over Evans.

People certainly were all abuzz over you playing B. A. Baracus. Even Dana proclaiming that you were no actor and the movie would flop, made your fans want to wee the movie to form their own opinion.

The fact that a very popular fighter in the UFC did not hurt Dana and the organization, and now that you are "back," to fulfill your commitment to your grudge match with Suga, fans will be rabid to see the conflict finally settled in the cage as it should have been in December.

Now in a month or so after Rashad has completed his next fight, you and he will meet and he will have either another win or defeat on his record; you, however, will have had a time to rest before training for the fight. Pretty smart strategy.

Eventually whether your movie fails or not, you will have a nice check for fighting Rashad, win or lose.

You further ticked Granny off with your "non-coaching" approach to your team on TUF 10. I expected a lot more from you, someone who says his feelings are easily hurt by being dissed.

Your "titties" remarks and actions reminded me of being an early developer in grade school and the harassment I had to endure at the hands of some cruel and typically juvenile prepubescent boys. I have never gotten over it and gladly agreed to a breast reduction in my mid twenties because of the stigma of being too well endowed.

Because I seriously hoped to be a coach of women's sports and took Profession Physical Education courses in college (in addition to majors in Secondary Education and English Literature, which put me in summer school through out my college years), I was very let down by your lack of connection with your team.

Rashad, whom I already greatly admired, continued to rack up brownie points by even extending his sympathy to the guys on your team when you showed them your back as you left them to suffer their defeat. Not at all cool to see. You are no longer my hero.

As I am a family oriented old broad, I dislike the uncaring image you portray. What kind of a role model are you, even to your own children?

My history includes a gigantic meltdown when I went all "mental" and almost lost my life, my home, marriage and the love of my family. I had to endure discrimination and put in many years of very difficult work to regain what almost slipped out of my grasp, so I do know and empathise with your mental breakdown.

It is what your actions have been since your other difficulties that I take issue with now.

In the end, I do not wish you ill, I simply no longer feel I could be cordial to you in a dinner situation, even with my family present. It is not in my nature to cause that much embarrassment to either one of us, or my family.

So, it is with great regret that I am uninviting you to eat with me.

Be heartened by the knowledge that fried chicken, mashed potatoes and chicken gravy, as well as deep fried corn fritters dipped in powdered sugar and drizzled in maple syrup are not considered a good diet for MMA fighters.

Better you try horse-meat with Patrick Cote, or drink urine with Mr. Machida.