Arsenal-Chelsea: Let's All Laugh at Chelsea

Once again, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the bet .

To those of you who might be new with this bet issue, allow me to elaborate.

Please read this article to get a full understanding on the current situation.  

Now, I believe everyone knows a very important fact by now.

I am a man of my word.

If, God forbid, Chelsea ends up winning, I will write that article no matter how many times I puke during the process.

Now, if Arsenal win, Salomon Gonzales, the fair Chelsea community leader, will write an article describing how brilliant and successful Arsenal are.

But before all that, please allow me to start the feud by laughing at Chelsea for a few minutes.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  *Unstoppable giggling*

Their manager looks like a mustache-less version of Super Mario.

AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA *Insatiable cackaling*

Their entire squad are old geezers.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *Maniacal laughter*

With Lampard back, Van Persie and Gallas out, they are favorites to win tomorrow.

AHAH....Ohhh wait.... Oh dear

Anyways, here are the top 4 reasons why every neutral person out there should root for Arsenal.

1. Chelsea play anti-football, as has been proved by Barca last year.

2. Their home and away jersies are ugly. The third is pretty cool though.

3. They have Ashely "The Scum" Cole.

4. Drogba is , and I quote, "A f*****g disgrace."

Salomon, my friend, when you write about Arsenal's victory, I want it to be called: "Arsenal FC: The sexiest team on Earth".

I also want you to describe in detail who you think is the most attractive on the squad and explain why.

If you think I've reached a new low, wait and see what I have in store for a special douche bag when Man U visit the Emirates next January.