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Welcome to Cubs General Manager Jim Hendry's Roast

John ChonarzewskiAug 20, 2009

Before I begin let me make this perfectly clear in order that there is no misunderstanding of my article.ย  Today I am attempting to be a comedian and if you think my article is not funny that's ok because not everyone has the same sense of humor.ย  I am just poking fun here is all so don't send me any hate comments cause I won't read them.ย  It's all in good fun, ok?

They are coming out with a new show next season about the 2009 year of the Cubs called Lost, Again!

They are thinking about moving the Cubs to a different channel next year.ย ย  They are putting it on the Fearnet channel because it is now considered a horror show.

Perry Mason:ย ย  Isnโ€™t it true, Mr. Hendry that you lied to Cub Fans about improving the team by acquiring Bradley, Miles, and Gregg?

Jim Hendry:ย  No comment.

Perry Mason:ย  Isnโ€™t it true, Mr. Hendry that you are already preparing a statement which places the blame for not winning the division on injuries, etc.

Jim Hendry:ย  No comment.

Perry Mason:ย  Isnโ€™t it true, Mr. Hendry that your wife is a Cardinalโ€™s Fan and has asked you for a divorce to marry a Cardinal Fan because sheโ€™s tired of being married to a loserโ€?

Jim Hendry:ย  No comment.

Perry Mason:ย  And isnโ€™t it true, Mr. Hendry that you make bets against the Cubs for your own personal gain?

Jim Hendry:ย  5th amendment.

Perry Mason:ย  How long has it been, Mr Hendry since you made the right decision on anything let alone the improvement of the Cubโ€™s team?

Jim Hendry:ย ย  5th amendment.