Commentators and Fans Take in the Sight of Majestic Big Men at the NFL Combine

Reduced to its simplest function, the NFL combine is an oglefest of the human form.

No matter how many times they've seen it, most people never quite seem to get used to the sight of college football's biggest, fastest leviathans ripping about the field in drag-racing spandex.

It's a weird and obsessive affair, with each player's form and dimension analyzed down to a molecular level. If a lineman has a "powerful foundation," men he has never met will comment on it as his hips quiver in slow motion on national television.

With this in mind, things are off to a more or less usual start at the 2015 combine. NFL Network's Mike Mayock kicked off the in-depth analysis by drawing on a Major Lazer song to comment on Stanford offensive tackle Andrus Peat and his "bubble butt."

Here's a Vine of his comment, uploaded by Joe Goodberry.

"Look at the body, look at that bubble butt…thighs! I mean, that's power," Mayock said.

The NFL has since clarified the definition of "bubble butt."

Vinny Viner uploaded video of Mayock's further comments on Peat's Pro Bowl potential.

"He flashes Pro Bowl stuff, but the consistency isn't there," Mayock said.

Another commentator honorary came to Tennessee State offensive lineman Robert Myers, who earned the "Quadzilla award" after his shorts migrated up his thighs during a drill.

Vinny Viner uploaded video of Quadzilla's coronation—a rich combine tradition indeed.

Last, but not least—your faces of the combine tracker:

It's not weird, everyone. It's just guys watching players run around and prognosticating on their bodies/NFL futures. That's what the combine is all about.

Dan is on Twitter. Scouting notes on his lower body include "honest hips."