Come To Think of It...Guys Do It All the Time

Guys do it all the time.

But what is it that we do?

Take care of our families, work hard, put food on the table—is that what we're talking about?

Well, not exactly.

Let me explain. Roger Clemens, who you used to know as one of the greatest pitchers of all-time, but who is now known for much more devious qualities, apparently has had a long running affair with a country singer.

It purportedly started when the Rocket was an ace for the Red Sox and she was 15. You read that right, 15.

Now before anyone goes off making assumptions, the relationship was never sexual, say Roger's attorneys. This is an important distinction to make, not only for Roger's marriage and reputation, but so that he avoids the legal aspects of cavorting with an underage female. The law frowns on that stuff.  As a guy with young daughters myself, I frown on it too.

That Roger Clemens, what a guy, helping a young, struggling artist out with her career. What a selfless act from a true American hero. Purely altruistic. Genuine.

Or not.

And this couldn't come at a worse time for Clemens, who is banking on his fast fading reputation to save him in the court of public opinion, which, until now, has been the only court that really and truly matters to him anyway.

I mean, he's not likely to go to jail over steroids.

But if the court of public opinion, which includes the hanging judges, or in this case, the baseball writers, deems him guilty, it's goodbye Hall of Fame glory and welcome to Pete Rose's invisible prison without bars.

And cheating on your wife, especially with a teenager, is never good for one's reputation.

Oh wait, I forgot, it wasn't sexual. Damn, I keep forgetting that part.

I did not have sex with that woman. Is this Roger Clemens or a former President we're talking about?

Either way you look at it, a rat still smells like a rat. Even when there's no cheese.

Oh, by the way, that country singer who Clemens had the innocent affair with, one Mindy McCready, who's rap sheet is longer than her music sheet?

Her first single was called "Guys Do It All the Time."

Come to think of it, even if that were true, it wouldn't make him any less of a scumbag in my world.