OkCupid Ads for NBA's Most Eligible Trade Targets

We are days away from the NBA's trade deadline (Feb. 21), and there are still quite a few moves that may take place. We're just waiting for the "when" and "who" to really shake out the details.

Teams are past the feeling-out stage with who they want to make a move for and what they want to give up, so the floodgates should open any second now.

With some of the most high-profile teams in the NBA struggling around the bottom of the playoff picture, expect there to be a lot of names on the move, even if they're just some lower-level players who will fill a role for the time being.

However, there are still quite a few high-profile names on the market, and the likelihood that they're moved is increasing every hour.

So, in order to feel out what each of these players want in a new team and what they're going to be looking for in the future, I've created a dating profile for each player. That way teams still looking into them can get a feel to see if they're the right fit.

Eric Bledsoe

My Self-Summary

I'm a little dude, but I pack quite a punch.

For whatever reason, there's this other point guard who my team seems to like a bit more than me, and I'm never going to get to start with him playing here.

I guess that means I've got to look for a new start; somewhere that will give me a chance to let me be me.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Jumping really high, playing crazy defense and getting everyone excited.

Seriously, I don't think there's a single person who has anything bad to say about me.

I'm Really Good At...

Defense.

Sure, I've only started a few games in my career, but when you get me in there for spurts at a time, I'm going to be working my butt off.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Hanging in L.A.

I dig the town, but if you're going to give me a starting spot, I'll go wherever.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I was made in a lab.

Seriously, I'm a genetic miracle.

I'm Looking For...

Anything, really. Just give me a shot.

J.J. Redick

My Self-Summary

Well, in the beginning, everybody thought I would be nothing more than a three-point shooter in this league.

Suddenly people realize that I can pass, shoot, dribble and even defend a little bit, and now it seems like I've got to leave Orlando.

What I'm Doing with My Career

I'd really like to stay put, but I guess it would be nice to win a title one of these days.

I'm Really Good At...

Shooting three-pointers.

But seriously, don't typecast me into a role I've already grown out of. I can do a ton more than people give me credit for.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Enjoying Orlando. Seriously, I dig the town and don't want to leave.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

Justin Bieber is my dude, despite what I'm telling the media.

I'm Looking For...

A team that's going to put me in a role that's more than just a corner shooter. 

I want to do what I'm doing here in Orlando, but I guess I could sacrifice a bit if it means a shot at a title. 

Paul Millsap

My Self-Summary

There's a ton about my game that you're going to like, and some that's even going to get you excited. But it seems as if I'm just under that All-Star level that people tend to look for.

Throw me in as your second-best player, and you'll be happy. Third-best player, and you'll be ecstatic. Just don't trade for me, thinking I'll become a superstar.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Scoring, scoring and then scoring a little bit more. Oh, I can play some defense every now and then, but I'm best with the ball in my hands.

I'm Really Good At...

Hitting clutch three-pointers. Seriously, did you see my game in Miami a few years back? They just seem to fall.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Dude, I live in Utah. It's either cold or I'm counting the days until the next road trip.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I secretly long to be a jump-shooter.

I'm Looking For...

A new place to start. I know I can be a great player on a great team. I've just got to find the right fit.

Andrea Bargnani

My Self-Summary

Ciao. Nobody seems to like me in Canada anymore, so I think it's time to leave.

There's nothing left that I can do to help this team. They've already replaced me with two big men who fans like better and a scoring leader who might not be efficient, but does make some big shots.

It's time to move on.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Um...I don't really know.

I'm making a lot of money as of late, so that's nice.

I'm Really Good At...

Three-pointers! Here we go, I knew there was something I was forgetting to tell you guys.

I'm a really big guy who can shoot well. If you need something like that, then I'm your guy.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Digging in on some Primo Pasta.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I'm not playing defense. Well, I guess if you've watched me play, then you've pretty much seen me publicly admit that. But seriously, I'm not playing defense.

I'm Looking For...

Anywhere else, so long as I don't have to play defense and I get to shoot plenty of three-pointers when I get there.

Kevin Garnett

My Self-Summary

I'm telling you right now that I'm not playing for your team. The only way I'm leaving Boston is with a gun to my head.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Staying in Boston. There's no way I'm coming to play on your team, I don't care who it is.

I'm Really Good At...

Playing basketball for the Celtics. That, and being mean to dudes who don't play basketball for the Celtics.

You can see where these two virtues will clash if I end up getting traded away from the Celtics.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

In Boston, where I'll be next Friday night after the trade deadline. I told you, I'm not leaving this town.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

Even when I was in Minnesota, I was pretending I was in Boston.

I'm Looking For...

Any team that plays their home games in the state of Massachusetts.

Mark Cuban

My Self-Summary

I bought the Dallas Mavericks back when they were the laughingstock of the league in 2000. The team turned around, and I became the hero of Dallas.

This is the worst team that I've fielded in over a decade of owning them, and I'm tired of it.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Buying and selling whatever I think is going to make me some money.

Oh, and making a stink with referees so I can continue to rack up those NBA fines. That's definitely the fun part.

I'm Really Good At...

Making money.

I've been doing it all my life, whether it be on television, through this basketball team or just selling my hat on the street for a few bucks.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Watching Shark Tank, America's most-loved television show.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I never wanted Deron Williams to come to Dallas. His hair is just too strange.

I'm Looking For...

Winners.

I need guys who are going to come into this town and play winning basketball for me.

Josh Smith

My Self-Summary

OK, so I'm an excellent basketball player, there's no doubt about that. The only problem is I'm not going to play how you want me to.

I can get to the rim, but I'm going to shoot a lot. I can defend like crazy, but I'm only going to do it when I want to. And I'm going to be moody the whole time.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Trying to get paid.

I'm Really Good At...

Shooting jumpers.

Well, I'm not good at actually making them, but I'm great at shooting them.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Practicing my jumpers.

Nah, I'm just kidding. I usually just hang out with some friends.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I can be kind of lazy at times.

I'm Looking For...

Money. That's about the long and short of it.

Shwight Showard

My Self-Summary

You may have seen me play a bit of defense in the past, win a few dunk contests and score like crazy when my team gets me the ball.

Lately I've been having some troubles, and I'm not exactly sure what I want.

The only request is that we keep this on the down-low. I don't want anybody finding out what I'm doing on here.

What I'm Doing with My Career

Trying to win a ring, but on my terms and nobody else's.

I'm Really Good At...

Getting people on the same page.

Well, it's not that they're on the same page with me, it's that they're all on the same page with a particular opinion about me.

But seriously, don't listen to them, it's not true.

On a Typical Friday Night, I'm Usually...

Icing my back, shoulder and any other part of me that's hurting on that particular evening, which is usually most parts lately.

The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit

I didn't actually use my real name on here, but I can't tell you who I am.

I'm Looking For...

Somewhere that will deal with me for a few years before I get bored again.

Oh, and a team that won't say anything about this until there's something getting done. Seriously, though, don't tell anybody.