Come To Think Of It: NBA's New "Too Many Men" Rule Penalizes Madonna

The NBA announced that its owners have approved a modification to the "too many men" rule, and pop singer Madonna was the first to get flagged for a violation.

Madonna was penalized for having had too many men in what her lawyers have termed a "blatant and patent violation of her basic rights."

Although the "pop tart" was unavailable for comment, her spokesman said the new rule was confusing.

"Of course she has slept with more men than Elton John, but she never even played high school basketball...although she has slept with several of the NBA teams."

News of this rule change has spread like wildfire. Agents of stars like Britney Spears, Cher, Miley Cyrus, and Tom Cruise are concerned, though these personalities have yet to be penalized.

"It's a good thing they didn't have this rule back in the day," said longtime film star Elizabeth Taylor.

A spokesman for Michael Jackson wanted to know if the rule only applied to grown males and whether it applied only to on-the-court situations.

"Do playgrounds count?" the assistant inquired.

NBA Commissioner David Stern has steadfastly refused to address these issues.

The "Octomom," as she is known, was relieved to find out that the rule does not extend to having too many babies. 

Mike Veeck, the son of former baseball owner Bill Veeck, knows what his father would do to get around the rule if he owned a basketball team.

"Just put in midgets. They're 'little men,' so they should only count as half."

While some wondered how anyone could have "too many" men, others were more intrigued by what the penalty was going to be.

"I hope they spank me...er, I mean the offender...real hard while tied up and wearing handcuffs," said Eddie Curry.

This rule is creating quite an interesting situation, come to think of it.