Things That Might (Not) Have Been in the News

There's been a lot of wild stories circulating in the news recently.  Here are some headlines you probably didn't see:

World Politics: "Steelers owner Dan Rooney Named Ambassador to Ireland.  Detractors Fear He Will Encourage 'Shotgun Formation'."

World Baseball Classic: "Netherlands Elimination Blamed on Sidney Ponson. Yankees, Rangers, Orioles Shocked."

and in a related story...

"Post-Elimination Ponson Goes on Eating Binge.  Simon, Blylevyn Missing."

Major League Baseball: "Manny Ramirez Pulls Hamstring in Outfield Debut, Sox's Papelbon Calls it 'Manny Being Manny'."

NCAA Basketball: "New-Attitude Panthers Vow to Only Miss Free-Throws After Sweet 16."

NCAA Football: "Al Davis Buys Vols, Requests Kiffin Resignation."

NFL Football: "Cutler, McDaniels Agree to Appear on 'Judge Judy' to Settle Dispute."

NFL Football: "Owens Already Saying Edwards Not Getting Him the Ball Enough."

Major League Baseball: "A-Rod Post-Surgery Rehab Going Well, Cousin Says."

NHL: "After Five-Point Night, Penguins to Inject Malkin With Flu Before Every Game."

Politics: "Obama NCAA Bracket Picks Infuriate Republicans."

and in another national newspaper, this:

"Republican Leaders To Try To Block Obama NCAA Picks."

NFL Football: "Raiders Fail to Sign Owens, Will Pursue 'Pacman'."

Major League Baseball: "Pirates, Royals Prepared to Best Rays, Win Series."

NHL: "NBC Voted Out of NHL TV Lineup By New Fired Coaches Association."

World Baseball Classic: "Pudge Rodriguez Goes on Mission Trip to Help Poor Astros."

Baseball: "Martinez Undecided on Who New 'Doddy' Will Be."

Baseball: "Bonds Turned Down By Independent League Teams, Will Try Junior College."

NFL Football: "Cardinals Sign McFadden, Will Change Name to 'Arizona Ex-Steelers'."

NFL Football: "Lions Considering Crabtree for Top Pick, Will Consult Millen."

Tha-Tha-That's All Folks!!  More to Come!