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It's Official: Scoring a Goal Is Better Than Sex

Andrew McNair
Mar 14, 2009

Almost a year ago, I wrote an article asking the world if scoring a goal was better than sex? As one can see in the response, the idea was widely received and many sided with my opinion of scoring goals being better than sex.

However, I am not a professional โ€œshaggerโ€ and with my professional career limited to the South African lower leagues, I was unable to declare scoring goals as better than sex due to a lack of an expertโ€™s opinion.

So you can imagine my surprise as Iโ€™m flicking through Aprilโ€™s issue of Four Four Two and find an interview with a porn star, who just happened to once be an England school boy international, and is the current captain of Hollywood FC.

Danny Mountain is not only a professional porn star of hits such as To the Manor Porn, but is married to one as wellโ€”the very cute Eva Angelina. So I think we can take his word on matters involving sex. After all, not only does he have aย sexy wife, but his work involves countless beauties on an almost daily basis.

Not bad work if you can get it.

Mountainโ€™s football career came to an abrupt end as a teenager when a knee injury ended his professional dreams, but he still plays for Hollywoodโ€™s all star side most Sundayโ€™s. So I think he is the most qualified yet to answer my year old question.

Is scoring a goal better than sex?

โ€œAbsolutely," Mountain said in the interview. "I work with beautiful women from Monday to Saturday, but the best time of the week is the 90 minutes of football I get on a Sunday.โ€

Well, I canโ€™t say I didnโ€™t tell you so.

โ€œScoring a goal, to me, is simply the most satisfying rush on earth. I could even argue itโ€™s better than sex," he said. "If you have to work as hard for sex as you do to score a goal, then my friend, you are with the wrong woman."

โ€œIt doesnโ€™t matter which level you play at or even who youโ€™re playing against, but thereโ€™s something about scoring a goal that just feels fantastic. Scoring a goal is arguably the best feeling, even better if you are a striker. We live on goals, with a goal on Saturday boosting us all the way till next weekend. It doesnโ€™t even really matter how it goes inโ€”top corner or deflectionโ€”that feeling of relief, mixed with absolute pleasure is simply unequalled in my opinion.โ€ย