Usain Bolt and Manchester United: What If the World's Fastest Man Had Game?

Connor McKnightSenior Analyst IAugust 10, 2012

LONDON, ENGLAND - AUGUST 09:  Usain Bolt of Jamaica celebrates after winning gold in the Men's 200m Final on Day 13 of the London 2012 Olympic Games at Olympic Stadium on August 9, 2012 in London, England.  (Photo by Clive Brunskill/Getty Images)
Clive Brunskill/Getty Images

As the Olympics slowly come to an end, Usain Bolt has proven that he is, without a doubt, the fastest man in the world.

Through Twitter, Bolt has expressed an interest to play soccer. Although it remains unclear how serious this interest may be, Manchester United defender Rio Ferdinand has arranged for a tryout for the track star with the Red Devils.

The thought of the world’s fastest man taking the pitch at Old Trafford has inspired a bit of media frenzy. There is plenty of talk about the type of weapon that would provide to an already championship-bound squad.

Realistically, Bolt would need an incredible touch as well as a top-notch shot to become a starting forward and an offensive threat for Manchester United. He would also have to muscle his way into the starting eleven past Wayne Rooney, Javier Hernandez, and an emerging star as seen as this year’s Euro Cup, Danny Welbeck. Maybe even Robin van Persie.

However, suspend reality for a second. What if Usain Bolt had the necessary skills to make it in the English Premier League?

The counterattack for Manchester United would simply be unstoppable. English Premier league foes would be devastated by an over-the-top through ball that would send Bolt sprinting past center backs around the league.

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The sheer height of the track star would make him a sure target for crosses and corner kicks. His ability to break free from defenders would be extraordinary and would be a living nightmare for opposing defenses.

Bolt’s goal celebrations would be all the more entertaining. Imagine combining Balotelli’s recklessness with the humor of Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson and thousands of passionate fans? His playful nature would definitely lead to a suspension or two.

The Jamaican squad could potentially become relevant on the international spectrum. Although it may be incredibly difficult, the small island team could potentially make a splash in CONCAF tournaments, although qualifying for the World Cup would be extremely unlikely.

But, unfortunately, this imaginary scenario is extremely unlikely. We can enjoy thinking about it, but this is just another one of Bolt’s entertaining media stunts.

We will just have to wait until Rio in 2016 to see what the Jamaican has in store for us in the next Olympics. 


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