Dallas Cowboy Fans: Tied Down with a Wood Block Between Their Feet

In 1990, Kathy Bates tied James Caan to a bed, put a wood block between his feet, and broke his ankles with a sledgehammer in the movie, Misery.

In 2008, the Dallas Cowboys organization began tying their fans up, and now in 2009, the organization is swinging the sledgehammer, one crunch and agonizing cry after another.

Now, Cowboys fans are limping permanently and finding out that Dan Reeves, a former Cowboy and four-time Super Bowl losing head coach, has too much dignity to even be an advisor to Jerry Jones.

In the totally under-rated back-story, Jerry Jones is building the Temple of Jones in the worst economy of our lifetimes and is totally distracted by the economic problems facing that venture.  What's the big deal about losing a consultant and having trouble paying for the Greatest Show-Off Turf?

This are merely just another snap in America's Fans tarsals.

In succession, here is the misery immediately following 13-3, trip to Cabo, gutless collapse to the Giants.

• Wade Phillips claims the best team lost in Texas Stadium following the Giants game.
• Jason Garrett interviews for two head coaching jobs, and reportedly turns them down. Both Falcons and Ravens made the playoffs without him.
• Half of the staff migrates with Bill Parcells and Tony Sparano to South Florida for a playoff season running the Dolphins.  Jason Ferguson, Akin Ayodele,  Keith Davis (for training camp), and Anthony Fasano join them there.
• Cowboys trade for Adam Jones.
• Cowboys retain Brad Johnson.
• Hard Knocks chronicles the life and times of Martellus Bennett, aka Marty B, the release of Terry Glenn, Jason Garrett's Knute Rockne impersonation, and Danny Amendola.
• Dallas starts 3-0, plays three consecutive horrid games, in which their proclivity for back-breaking turnovers and penalties finally surpasses their ability to outscore those mistakes.
• Tony Romo spends four weeks injured, and Pro Bowl punter Mat McBriar and rookie sensation Felix Jones are lost for the season.
• In a panic, Jerry Jones trades for Roy Williams from the Detroit Lions in a mini-Herschel Walker trade. Williams was reportedly spotted in the end zone at Texas Stadium during the Buccaneers game and never seen again making a contribution.
• Cowboys lose to Saint Louis in Brad Johnson's debut as the starting quarterback. Johnson will start the following two games, shocking Tampa Bay with 122 passing yards in his only win as starter.
• Tony Romo returns to defeat Washington, prompting idiot columnists around the country to predict a playoff run.
• After two easy victories at Texas Stadium, Dallas loses 3 of 4 in December in horrible fashion:  interception return for touchdown versus Pittsburgh, consecutive 80+ yard touchdown runs in the final moments of Texas Stadium's history versus the Ravens, and a complete woodshed game by the Eagles.
• Wade Phillips promises to be a tough guy from now on.
• Bradie James laughs at Coach Phillips promises and then assaults a fan at Valley Ranch.
• Jason Garrett interviews for multiple head coaching jobs and is passed over.
• Wade Phillips is retained.

While those aren't the only moments, that is a brief history of how the Dallas Cowboys organization has destroyed the trust and good will of America's Fan Base. If you hear a sledgehammer ping in the distance, it may not be from building the Temple of Jones, it may be from the fans buried underneath it.