Ashton's Blog: NFL's Off-season Drug, Mock Draft Syndrome

Question: Are you suffering from (MDS) Mock Draft Syndrome?...Trust me, I've been under the influence of this rare but yet over-exercised drug, being a fan of the Denver Broncos and looking at our defense for the past two years.  Now think; what if I was a fan of the Detroit Lions?  While you, in the interest of your health and your team's fan system should probably take a chill pill, unless, however, you are a addict.

Foremost, It would probably be smarter to tell your 4-year-old daughter that imitations of Brian Orakpo coming off the edge in a 3-4 scheme on a bar stool is most likely not the look he is going to actually give you, therefore, you punish her. Yes, I have Brian Orakpo going to the Packers in the first, but then again they are cheeseheads so I don't know what to expect.  Most people who have MDS are very unaware of the side effects and what "extra effect" the drug can have with dry erase markers. Yes, Dry erase markers.

Side effects follow: harsh reality, nausea, vomiting from the mouth (unless there is a slight possibility that you can do it elsewhere, which is sick and grotesque by the way). Strangely thats not the gist of it, no. Want to know what happens when a dry erase marker is used?.  

According to the 1998 draft scandal, scientists at NFL Network paired up with at team of Neoscientist at ESPN and noticed that dry erase markers were used by the San Diego Chargers when the "accidentally" selected Ryan Leaf with the second overall pick.

Man, what a bummer. So even though the Detroit Lions dont have the second overall pick, they very might just take Michael Crabtree twice in the first round.

Although this maneuver is impossible and very illegal, it's the Detroit Lions. They have set NFL records with the most consecutive humiliating seasons, period.

So as your doing your Mock Drafting, always be aware that anyone could be the biggest bust. Who are you taking for your first pick?

Ashon's Blog: Where dry humor and football mix, almost like the Cowboys.