Er, that is, the quiche.
From an excruciatingly pun-infested article in the Daily Mail:
Fulham have bought 12 hens to live at their training ground to help cut costs.
This isn't a yoke or a poultry effort but a real coop as the club attempts to save £5,000 a year on catering.
Martin Jol’s squad, including deep-laying centre forward Pavel Pogrebnyak, go through 90 eggs a week at their Motspur Park base in Surrey.
Yoke? Coop? Deep-laying? My oh my. And bloggers are considered the bane of journalism.
But wait, it gets worse.
Fry-day is known to be particularly popular as the team toast their cluck for Saturday's big match.
Someone suspected fowl play but at least we now know what is eggs-scelerating top-scorer Clint Dempsey's accuracy in front of goal this season.
What, you couldn't poach a hard-boiled pun in there? Did nobody's name rhyme with omelet?
Excruciating wordplay aside, this is the best proof yet that Dempsey needs to leave Fulham. This sort of thing would never happen at Old Trafford or the Emirates.
Dempsey is tied for fourth in the English Premier League scoring charts, and his value has never been higher. And, as B/R national lead writer Dan Levy points out, Dempsey's peripheral stats place him in the elite tier of Premiership players.