Marlins Park: Team Swings and Misses with Fish Tank and Home Run Sculpture

The Miami Marlins need to choke up and aim for the opposite field because they started the season in an 0-2 hole. That would be due to the two tacky, and some would say malicious, features of their new ballpark. 

The Marlins underwent a complete facelift this offseason. They got a new logo, a new look and a new stadium. It was all designed to drive home a bit of the Miami culture. 

It is great when teams try to incorporate the feel of their location in their colors and park, but in Miami's case, this proved to be a bit problematic. 

Lets start with the home run sculpture. 

This obnoxious monstrosity was designed to delight fans by moving and lighting up every time a Marlin hits a home run. The problem is that no Marlin may ever hit a home run with the unnaturally bright colors of the sculpture distracting and blinding hitters while they try to focus on the pitcher. 

The other problem is this thing already looks dated. This is the kind of thing that people would have built in the '50s when they wanted something to look like it came from the future. The result is it looks fake and cheap. 

If someone hits that with a home run, I'm pretty sure it will crumble into a big pile of scrap. If that happens in the first game, then I will say the sculpture was a rousing success. 

The other big feature is the two fish tanks that are part of the backstop behind home plate. What exactly is the point of this? Who, but the players, will actually be able to see these fish?

TV cameras will catch them for viewers at home, but if people were interested at staring at fish on a screen, they'd be looking at their screen saver and not watching baseball. 

Not surprisingly, this also isn't flying over so well with PETA. So with the fish tank, the Marlins just alienated a certain segment of their fanbase for something no one can see to enjoy. 

The Marlins didn't fail for lack of effort; they failed for having horrible taste and ridiculous ideas.