Funny Football Quotes—Away From the Serious

After all the serious business, all the Champions League tensions, fans all over bleacher report posting comments on whether their team played well or not, or what their managers should have done in the game, I thought I'd add a bit of flavour to the articles.

I'm sure there have been many articles like this but still thought I would write it.

There's been so much drama this week and this would be a good way to get the tension out and look at football through the eyes of players, managers and commentators.

Some of them you may have heard before, others...might be quite new.

Anyhow, enjoy the laugh (if you do laugh).

Great Managers

'We must have had 99% of the game. It was the other three per cent that cost us the match.' - Ruud Gullit (Ruud Gullit shows his math skills, might've been the reason he went into football instead of staying in school)

 'The first 90 minutes are the most important.' - Bobby Robson (The great Sir Bobby forgets the rules of the game for a second or two)

 'Very few of us have any idea whatsoever of what life is like living in a goldfish bowl,except, of course, for those of us who are goldfish.' - Graham Taylor (Graham Taylor's philosophy lectures rub off on the game...)

Of the nine red cards this season we probably deserved half of them.'  - Arsene Wenger (Forgets that half of 9 would be 4.5 - a number only Arsenal are capable of getting)

'When a player gets to 30, so does his body.' - Glen Hoddle (Glen's been taking philosphy classes with Graham Taylor...)

Great Players 

'I couldn't settle in Italy—it was like living in a foreign country.' - Ian Rush (Rush thought half the world was still part of the British Empire - including Italy?...)

'My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7' - David Beckham (David talks about his grief about his parents not being there for him for the first seven years of his life... despite them being around his whole life...)

'The Brazilians were South American, the Ukrainians will be more European'. - Phil Neville (Phil's geography skills slightly better than Ian Rush's!)