DeMarcus Cousins Video: Watch Kings Star Describe His Perfect Valentine's Day

First off, I don't condone ever dating DeMarcus Cousins. I would fear that he might get you fired or whine about personal fouls all night. At least we have an idea of what a magical night of romance with him would entail. 

What we have here is a silly little video featuring the enigma known as DeMarcus Cousins. The Kings big man is asked about his idea of the perfect Valentine's date. 

He then paints the perfect picture of a man who is trying to spend about five bucks on this date. This includes a moonlight walk on the beach, holding hands and then stopping at the corner to listen to somebody play a violin. 

Then he would take a horse-drawn carriage around the town driven by white horses. That is when he would pull a white rose out and then smooching would ensue. 

Either Cousins believes he is living in a Disney cartoon, or he has a very limited idea of the perfect date. 

Let me try to remedy this for the man. 

When someone asks you the about the perfect date, the answer is Kate Upton. In fact, she is the answer to pretty much any question being asked right now. 

Hey, DeMarcus, what did you go see last night? Kate Upton. What is your favorite thing in the whole universe? Kate Upton.

This guy wants to listen to the violin and get pulled around Sacramento by smelly horses so he can grope some innocent Kings fan. Not all that imaginative, but I will give points for what I assume is the description of every single prom date in the last 10 years. 

DeMarcus Cousins then states that the best gift he ever gave was himself. Well, that's good and sucky. 

Imagine your boo showing up with Cousins tonight. You would have to ask why they couldn't pony up for Kwame Brown, or perhaps Darko Milicic. 

This was all in good fun, as was the interview. 

Have a Happy Valentine's Day. If you hear a violin tonight, look for a bunch of white horses and DeMarcus Cousins. 

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