1 Song to Sum Up Every NHL Team's Season so Far
Folks, we're a little more than one month into the 2023-24 NHL season, and there's been no shortage of fun and surprises.
The Bruins and the Golden Knights are still the best teams in the world, and it feels like both have somehow gotten better, even though we expected them to decline at least slightly.
The Metropolitan Division is a chaotic mess. We're seeing one of the best rookie classes, dare I say ever, led by phenom Connor Bedard, who is only exceeding his hype. The Sharks are on pace to be the worst NHL team in the modern day era, and—gasp—the Oilers are only a few wins in front of them.
How about one song to describe each team as we head into American Thanksgiving?
Atlantic Division
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Boston Bruins: 'Jeremy' by Pearl Jam
The lyrics of this song are actually very dark and not applicable, but Bostonians love at least two things: up-and-coming franchise goaltender Jeremy Swayman, and Pearl Jam concerts at Fenway Park.
Florida Panthers: 'Great King Rat' by Queen
You know who you are!
Detroit Red Wings: 'One Step at a Time' by Jordin Sparks
One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
Then we find the reasons why
One step at a time
You believe and you doubt
You're confused
And got it all figured out
Toronto Maple Leafs: 'Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over' by Fall Out Boy
For the love of God, all you needed was a solid defenseman, a reliable goalie and playoff Tyler Bertuzzi.
Tampa Bay Lightning: 'Welcome Back' by Mase
The Lightning have been declining a bit this season, but Andrei Vasilevskiy is back on the ice practicing after back surgery, and now it's everyone's problem.
Montreal Canadiens: '22 (Cole's Version)' by Taylor Swift
I don't know about you, but I'm feelin' 22
Buffalo Sabres: 'Good 4 U' by Olivia Rodrigo
Well, good for you, you look happy and healthy
Not me, if you ever cared to ask
Good for you, you're doing great out there without me, baby
God, I wish that I could do that
Ottawa Senators: 'You're So Last Summer' by Taking Back Sunday
Safe to say all the hope and good will from the Senators' offseason is just about gone.
Metropolitan Division
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New York Rangers: 'On to the Next One' by Jay-Z
The Jay-Z song selection is meant to encapsulate his entire vibe, because something specifically about New York would be way too easy. This song has always had Jay's New York swagger without him explicitly making it about the city (OK, he mentioned Bed-Stuy).
Some of the bars remind me of the season the Rangers are having, and the way they shed some big names in the offseason and came back with a deep supporting cast. They took risks with those big names at the deadline, it didn't exactly pan out, then they just kept doing what needed to be done. The New York way.
I move onward, the only direction
Can't be scared to fail in search of perfection
Washington Capitals: 'The Boys are Back in Town' by Thin Lizzy
Are they really, though?
Carolina Hurricanes: 'Blame Brett' by The Beaches
The Hurricanes defense, touted best in the league, has struggled at times this season. It's not that it's bad, it's just that many people truly don't comprehend the impact Brett Pesce has—most notably in his own zone and through the neutral zone. He was out of the lineup for nearly a month recovering from injury, and I'm not going to blame Brett for that, but I will blame Brett for the stability the team is about to have now that he's back.
Pittsburgh Penguins: 'This Could be the End' by Kings of Leon
I just wanna hold you, take you by your hands and tell you that you're good enough,
And tell you that it's gonna be tough
This could be the end
This could be the end
This could be the end
This could be the end
New Jersey Devils: 'Sophomore Slump or Comeback of the Year' by Fall Out Boy
Look, at least there's a clear reason the Devils, whom many expected to sit at the top of the Metro at this point, are having a tougher time. Star center Jack Hughes was on an absolute tear before getting injured. Since that November 3 game at St. Louis, the Devils have won twice in five games while being outscored 24-18.
The good news? Hughes is expected back Saturday, and the Devils just beat the Penguins in a commanding 5-2 win. The bad news? This team was expected to be so much more than just Hughes, and New Jersey had better use the information it received during his time out to sharpen up all around if it wants to make a deep playoff run this year.
Philadelphia Flyers: 'I Always Wanna Die (Sometimes)' by the 1975
The team isn't great, and it's not supposed to be! But then sometimes the team is really, really, good, and you get your hopes up. And then the team is really, really, bad and you get sad. And then the kids look great. And then John Tortorella is just as hype and just as sad as you. And then Gritty is on the Jumbotron with an emotional support alligator. I always wanna die, sometimes!
New York Islanders: 'I Know What You Did Last Summer' by Camila Cabello ft. Shawn Mendes
Literally nothing.
Columbus Blue Jackets: 'Don't Take The Money' by Bleachers
Sorry.
Central Division
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Dallas Stars: 'Can't Tell Me Nothing' by Kanye West
Keep sleeping on Dallas. The Stars have arguably the most complete team in the league right now with top end talent on offense, defense, and of course in net with Jake Oettinger.
Colorado Avalanche: 'Still Here' by Drake
Folks, the Colorado Avalanche are very much still here, Nathan MacKinnon and Cale Makar are still very much two of the best players in the league, and they aren't letting up with their recent 8-2 thrashing of the Ducks.
Winnipeg Jets: 'Fuel' by Metallica
Give me fuel
Give me fire
Give me Nino Niederreiter
St. Louis Blues: 'Smooth' by Santana ft. Rob Thomas
The Blues are currently chilling (despite a shocking 5-1 loss to the Sharks) at an 8-6-1 record, and young Robert Thomas is emerging as a potential league star.
Arizona Coyotes: 'Don't Forget About Us' by Mariah Carey
Clayton Keller is once again having a very good season and reminding us all that the Coyotes actually aren't that bad.
Minnesota Wild: 'Bored to Death' by Blink 182
Will the Wild ever be anything other than a middle-of-the-pack Central Division team?
Chicago Blackhawks: 'The Kids Are Coming (To Take You Down)' by Third Eye Blind
Connor Bedard is making one of the worst teams in the league must-watch hockey, and it's so fun to watch his confidence just grow each game. He's leading the Hawks with nine goals and 13 points in 14 games.
Nashville Predators: 'Over You' by Daughtry
Come on, Barry Trotz. It's rebuildin' time.
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Pacific Division
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Vegas Golden Knights: 'Sacrifices' by Drake
Yeah, I'm convinced
I made sacrifices, I been ballin' ever since
Yeah, I did some wrong, I had no choice, in my defense
The Golden Knights are showing us that the revolutionary idea of trading for actively good players—and doing whatever it takes to get them—is going to build a longtime elite franchise.
Vancouver Canucks: 'Feelin' Way too Damn Good' by Nickelback
Nickelback is a fan favorite at the Roxy, and it really does feel like something's gotta go wrong because these Canucks are way too damn good.
Los Angeles Kings: 'Keep Holding On' by Avril Lavigne
Is this team legit? There's been some inconsistency to start the season, but the most recent 2-1 win over a pretty good Panthers team is something to build on for the Kings. Keep going.
Anaheim Ducks: 'Stay Together for the Kids' by Blink 182
With every last shift, you can see the future coming together in Anaheim. Between Mason McTavish, Leo Carlsson, Trevor Zegras (well, not right now), and Pavel Mintyukov, this team is going to be running the league in five years. They've just gotta keep it together until then.
Seattle Kraken: 'The Best is Yet to Come' by Frank Sinatra
I still really like this Kraken team despite a rocky start to the season. Regression was expected, perhaps not to this extent, but get on one big hot streak, here, and everything is fine. I feel like the best is yet to come in Seattle this season.
Calgary Flames: 'Is It Over Now?' by Taylor Swift
Sadly for the Calgary Flames, "it," is not over, and it looks like last year's bad luck was actually just reality. The team is struggling to find identity, and the Jonathan Huberdeau contract is looking bleak. Hey, there's still almost a decade to turn that around at least.
Edmonton Oilers: 'Death by a Thousand Cuts' by Taylor Swift
Connor McDavid said it himself...
San Jose Sharks: 'Bohemian Rhapsody' by Queen
It doesn't really matter!
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