By day, I use my powers for good to write documents and articles explaining to customers that my products are far superior than our competitor's products. By night, I use my powers for evil to write occasionally interesting articles for bleacher report.

Having grown up with a professional athlete who played soccer, I was exposed early and often to all aspects of sports yet for some reason, unbeknown to my father, I outright hate soccer.

So, moving on to high school and college, I opted for the thrills of football, wrestling, and baseball. Given that I am vertically (and horizontally) challenged at only 5'11", I realized my professional career as the smallest and slowest middle linebacker in history was going to be a mere pipe dream.

So I did what any person in denial would do....I played college rugby for UCSB.

Once again, I find myself in denial about having any affiliation with professional sports so, here I am.

And yes, I still detest all aspects of soccer except for the 1972 US Olympic team, the San Jose Earthquakes in the 1970s, and a speedy striker with long blond hair wearing #14.