1. Good Night Mats Sundin, and Good Luck

    The first day of August came and the first day of August went, and there's still no word from Mats Sundin. As if this comes as a surprise to anyone. His Aug. 1 deadline had all the drama of a paint-drying party in Boring, OR...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 953 reads 14 comments

  2. Open Mic: Is the Hack & Wheeze an Olympic Sport?

    It's hard to get psyched about an Olympic Games I won't be able to see. Oh sure, NBC, ESPN, TSN, CBC, and dozens of other television networks across the globe will have the games covered ...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 301 reads 1 comments

  3. Shell Shock! The Peanut War Targets Safeco Field

    Peanut butter and jelly. The cornerstone of every child's lunch. At least, it used to be. When I was a kid, I couldn't get enough PB&J...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 128 reads 12 comments

  4. Greg Norman and the Birkdale Redemption

    There's a scene in the film The Shawshank Redemption that shows Andy Dufresne, played wonderfully by Tim Robbins, arriving at the cafeteria table after spending a few days in the hole, ...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 452 reads 1 comments

  5. Where in The World Is ... Mats Sundin?

    Alright, kids, the object of the game is to find Mats Sundin, the former captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 1,384 reads 19 comments

  6. Brett Favre Then, Brett Favre Now and Everything in Between

    So, Brett Favre wants to retire from retirement, something I didn't even know was possible, but there it is. Nothing more to say...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 615 reads 1 comments

  7. An Aloof Darryl Sutter Shows a Lack of Class

    When Calgary Flames GM Darryl Sutter met with the press to discuss the Flames' latest acquisition, Todd Bertuzzi, he wasn't surprised the Steve Moore incident came up. It was a simple question...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 527 reads 12 comments

  8. Don't Mess with Our Halls of Fame!

    My job requires me to rise and shine at the ungodly hour of 3:45am. A 15-minute shower and gallons of coffee keep my alert for the drive in but it's ESPN's All Night with Jason Smith that keeps me informed and entertained...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 472 reads 12 comments

  9. Madonna May be Kiss of Death for A-Rod

    There are some things in life you just don't do. Some are obvious, like jamming your finger into an electrical socket or using the exit ramp as an on-ramp, although I'm amazed how many times that one has made the six o'clock news...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 2,781 reads 10 comments

  10. Open Mic: The Unattainable Definition Of Sports

    "He could feel the single bead of sweat silently roll down his scalp, edging closer to the brim of his cap. "In that moment, he froze, as still as stone, an immovable object...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 717 reads 5 comments

  11. Gilbert Arenas' Payday, or How to Spend $100 Million

    The Washington Wizards are, apparently, ready to shell out $100 million in order to secure the services of Gilbert Arenas for the long-term. That's what you call giraffe money. When you've got that kind of coin, you might as well buy a giraffe...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 956 reads 9 comments

  12. Sporting Wood: Athletes Rising Above The Competition With Help From Viagra

    As Major League Baseball debates on whether or not the game could do without wood bats, there's another more pressing concern, one that bulges at the seams of the sporting world, ready to spew forth and bring many to their knees...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 708 reads 7 comments

  13. NHL: Cooked Duck May Be Good Eats for the Toronto Maple Leafs

    Jail, prison, the slammer, the big house, the hoosegow. Whatever you want to call it, Henry Samueli, owner of the Anaheim Ducks, won't spend one minute inside of one...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 1,262 reads 11 comments

  14. Is Gangsta Jerry Manuel Already Losing His Street Cred?

    I've never been to Shea Stadium, but neither has the New York Mets' newest manager Jerry Manuel. Not yet, anyway. He has made it known, however, that he doesn't take any crap...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 1,270 reads 3 comments

  15. George Carlin, a Tribute: Pucks Are for Urinals

    George Carlin was a counter-culture goliath, a witty and intelligent comedian who, at age 71, was still writing hilarious and pertinent comedy bits. He died of a heart attack over the weekend, silencing a voice that had no qualms sharing an opinion...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 16,138 reads 28 comments

  16. Nothing But a Bunch Of Dive Turkeys!

    I spent ten days in Paris earlier this month, right at the start of Euro 2008. Bulging cafés and tabacs could barely contain the throngs of Parisiennes, sipping cappuccino and Stella Artois, tearing at baguettes and cheering on les Blues...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about 6 years ago 1,139 reads 0 comments

  17. MMA and The Liberation Of The Feminized Male

    On November 12, 1993, I and about four other guys descended in to the poorly lit, wood-paneled basement of one of my best buddies...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 3,951 reads 22 comments

  18. Penguins Fail to Live Up to Stanley Cup Hype

    After four games, I find myself kinda bored. Sure, it was the Stanley Cup Final the league fantasized about. It was the matchup fans were excited to see...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 584 reads 3 comments

  19. OJ Mayo Affair: Payola, the Prospect, and Why It Doesn't Matter

    Alan "Moondog" Freed was the self-proclaimed father of rock 'n' roll and somewhat of a radio pioneer. At a time when racial segregation was alive and well, when lynchings were all ...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 527 reads 0 comments

  20. NHL Playoffs: Requiem for the Montreal Canadiens

    Montreal Canadiens fans awoke Saturday morning to thick, dark, rain-soaked clouds, hanging heavy over the city like a shroud.Rain spattered along Ste...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 980 reads 3 comments

  21. Rebuttal: Is Roger Clemens Really a Scumbag?

    The short answer is yes.The long answer is yes with a but ... I've spent the last couple of days digesting all the sordid details of the Roger Clemens/Mindy McCready scandal, ...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 2,896 reads 23 comments

  22. Atlanta Falcons: Matt Ryan and the Audacity Of Hope

    It has never been easy to be a Falcons fan. Hope and heartbreak have been the hallmarks for the Atlanta faithful. Recently, we had draped Michael Vick in the flag of hope, daring to dream he'd carry it with him to a Super Bowl Championship...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 1,317 reads 14 comments

  23. Soaring Gas Prices Have NASCAR Crying into Its Coors

    Pity the poor pit lane petrol pumpers. Like everyone else across North America and across the globe, NASCAR has to dig a little deeper to cover the cost of rising fuel prices...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 1,083 reads 5 comments

  24. NFL: Will The Madden Curse Strike Green Bay?

    Duck and cover, Cheeseheads! Brett Farve—who retired but may not have actually RETIRED, retired will grace the cover of Madden NFL 2009. You poor, fake cheese hat wearing bastards have no idea what's about to hit your fair city...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 1,256 reads 13 comments

  25. Canadiens-Bruins: Chaos Follows Montreal Victory

    Among the stack of Seven Jeans and Juicy Couture handbags rests a grapefruit sized chunk of pallid grey concrete. It has been torn from the cracked sidewalk out front and thrown through the large plate glass window of the haute-couture store on Ste...

    Tim Parent Written by Tim Parent about over 6 years ago 1,147 reads 4 comments