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William Berry Archives, Page 1 of 6

  1. ESPN Is Not a Valid Source for New England Patriots News

    OK, once again for new guys. Apparently there is an ESPN report that the Patriots will franchise Matt Cassel.Hey, it could be right. There is a 50/50 chance. Either he will be or he won't be; that is 50/50...

    Written by William Berry about 4 days ago 2 comments

  2. Whisenhunt Prepares Lienart To Run In To Replace Warner In Case Of Rapture

    Ken Whisenhunt is preparing to start Matt Leinart for Kurt Warner. "I saw a History Channel special on the world ending in 2012, " said the coach of the Arizona Cardinals. "That means that rapture thing is soon...

    Written by William Berry about 5 days ago 4 comments

  3. Let's Stop Hyperventilating About Cassel's Franchising

    Hey it could be right. There is a 50/50 chance. Either he will be or he won't be, that is 50/50. OK, now I'm going to quote Fahad Zaidl, a writer here at Bleacher Report. Sorry Fahad, picked you at random...

    Written by William Berry about 6 days ago 0 comments

  4. London Calling 2009.1

    Since we will get the Clash parodies no matter what, let me start. There are, what, two or two "London" songs everyone knows? :) London Calling(apologies to Strummer/Jones)London calling ...

    Written by William Berry about 7 days ago 0 comments

  5. Was Mangini the Right Guy to Blame?

    I'm a Patriots fan who was glad to see Fredo Ratgini fired. I also will never say anything good about Turd-gini. That said, the Jets fired the wrong guy. Those interceptions were Favre's fault...

    Written by William Berry about 7 days ago 4 comments

  6. ESPN Making Stuff Up, As Usual

    Sorry for the photo. First one not of NASCAR in the ESPN search. I no longer consider ESPN a valid news source. Neither should anyone legitimate media outlet getting AP...

    Written by William Berry about 8 days ago 9 comments

  7. Every Team But Like 10 or So Can Look to Get Scott Pioli.

    Yes, as Patriot fans we have heard this every year for about three or four years. If I remember Pioli was supposed to go to the Giants, Dolphins, Texans, Jaguars, Eagles, Seahawks, 49ers, etc...

    Written by William Berry about 9 days ago 2 comments

  8. Jets Name Elmo "Coach in WaIting" (Humor)

    With Mangini tottering, the Jets made an unexpected move today and announced a "coach in waiting." "For now Elmo will work as offensive play caller," said Coach Elmo. "Elmo tell Brett Favre, 'throw, throw, throw...

    Written by William Berry about 13 days ago 1 comments

  9. Bill Belichick Discusses Potential Coaching Hires (Humor)

    Coach Belichick was asked about Romeo Crennel possibly losing his job in Cleveland. "Dean [Pees] has been doing a good job for us as DC but someplace will always exist for a man of his stature...

    Written by William Berry about 13 days ago 1 comments

  10. Note to Arizona Cardinals Fans: That Was Not a Blizzard

    Just a note for warm-weather fans. Sunday was not a blizzard. You can tell because in a blizzard the news recounts death tolls, not football scores...

    Written by William Berry about 18 days ago 0 comments

  11. Jets-Dolphins: AFC East Showdown Moved to 4:15 PM

    They get to see if the Ravens beat the Jaguars and Patriots beat the Bills. If they win, Fredo Mangini is likely fired anyway. Why would Rat-gini even try then? If Fredo wins, then Belichick gets in the playoffs...

    Written by William Berry about 18 days ago 2 comments

  12. NFL Playoff Race: A Patriots Fan Roots for the Jets—Bitterly

    For those not Patriot fans, let me explain. Patriot fans hate the Jets. It is mutual, I'm sure, but I can't think like a Jets fan without vomiting in my mouth a little. Please don't ask me to do that...

    Written by William Berry about 18 days ago 3 comments

  13. Matt Cassel's Agent Pleased by Losman's Play

    Josh Tibbs, Matt Cassel's agent, had a big smile Sunday as he whistled a happy tune. ("We're In The Money," I think.) "I'm not happy about beating the Raiders," he said...

    Written by William Berry about 24 days ago 0 comments

  14. Toronto Resident Promises He Won't Do Again Whatever He Did to Deserve the Bills

    Guy LaMountaine moved from Montreal to Toronto. "I move to English part of country because, how you say, the NFL," said Guy. "No more Montreal Alouettes.. I was promised real football. NFL lies...

    Written by William Berry about 25 days ago 4 comments

  15. Al Davis Falls And Despite Wishes Of Raider Fans, Lives (Humor)

    Raiders owner Al Davis was hospitalized over the weekend after twisting his knee in a fall, a team source confirmed Thursday. He was soon admitted to Alta Bates Summit Medical Center in Berkeley...

    Written by William Berry about 26 days ago 0 comments

  16. Joey Porter On Plaxico Burress: No Really, I'm Serious

    Seriously, Joey Porter commented on the Plaxico Burress situation. I'll cut the usual reporter spin and just post the quotes...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 5 comments

  17. If Bill Belichick Was Free, Would You Want Him? (Excuse For a Poll)

    First off, he is not going anywhere. Fools can report he wants to coach "team X," or is tired of the Patriots, etc. I don't work for PFT, however. Let's assume your team either fires its coach, he retires, is hit by a bus, or whatever...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 3 comments

  18. Plaxico Burress Demands Trade (Humor)

    Reporters were shocked at Plaxico Burress' press conference. He was expected to express regret, contrition, etc. Instead, he shocked all present when he said, "That's how Plaxico rolls...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 1 comments

  19. Matt Cassel's Agent Saddened by Loss (Humor)

    Josh Tibbs, Matt Cassel's agent, saw millions of dollars fall away like a stripped fumble. "Just one week ago there was talk of a $14 million franchise tag," he said between tears. Well, actually I think he said...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 0 comments

  20. Adalius Thomas Still Not On IR After Three Weeks from ESPN "Sources"

    Remember how every outlet cited ESPN on Adalius Thomas's injury. I remember the guff I got for pointing out ESPN's source is either John Claytion's imaginary friend or a drunken, disgruntled, former janitor...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 1 comments

  21. Correspondence Between Mike Brown and Dan Snyder

    I've just intercepted letter between Mike Brown, Bengals owner, and Dan Snyder, Redskins owner.* Dear Dan "Arguably Greatest Football Brain Ever" Snyder, Washington Redskins May I call you Dan? I've been a closet Redskins fan for years...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 2 comments

  22. Are You Ashamed of Yourself, NCAA Football "Fan?"

    Um, Everyone know$ why there i$ no playoff. Now I'm going to ask you a tough question. Where do you think the money comes from? Some secret cabal of "boosters" of teams you hate? Try again...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 8 comments

  23. Burresses Marksmanship Questioned

    After being shot in the leg, Plaxico Burress's goal has been questioned. Tim Gann of the Make Suicide Legal Foundation sees this as an opportunity for Plaxico Burress to be their spokesman. "Lots of people would exit this vale of tears," said Mr...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 0 comments

  24. Shooter of Burress Speculated On

    As of the time of this writing, the shooter in the Plaxico Burress case has not been divulged. Dick Cheney and Marvin Harrison have made no comments for advice of their attorneys. OK, this is a cheap, easy joke...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 0 comments

  25. Plaxico Burress Shoots Himself

    I'm not making this up. Plaxico Burress shot himself. It appears to be a Barney Fife type accident, not a failed suicide attempt, but no info other than he was released from the hospital at 2 PM is available...

    Written by William Berry about about 1 month ago 0 comments