Elbow Murderpants Article Archive

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Anyone Smell A Comeback For The NHL?

While the GMs discuss more ways they can trick up the game, (in hopes of saving Bettman’s bacon?) we are perhaps provoked to ask, “Where is this increase in the fan base they keep striving ...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 20 days ago 81 reads 8 comments
Team Canada Early Picks Seem Myopic

If one was to believe the pundits after the Canadian Olympic Hockey Team orientation camp in August, they would accept that “no definite decisions” were made based on the performance of the ...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 25 days ago 103 reads 2 comments
Nominal Moves by Nieuwendyk Raise Questions on Tippett Dismissal

One can certainly understand the logic in limiting the amount of transactions the Dallas Stars would execute in the offseason prior to the 2009-10 campaign, but it does raise an interesting question regarding the firing of former head coach Dave Tippett..

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 2 months ago 221 reads 8 comments
Pros Score On Olympic Stage

With orientation camps for the Canadian and US Men’s 2010 Olympic ice hockey teams taking place in August, excitement for hockey has experienced a little late summer boost. And that’s always a good thing...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 3 months ago 31 reads 4 comments
Dallas Stars: 08/09 Season Threatens to Burn Out Early

The marketing slogan for the Dallas Stars’ 2008/2009 seasons was something like: Our Team. Our Time. Even though it’s a fairly tired sports cliché, you can forgive the marketing ...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 8 months ago 88 reads 3 comments
MRI Reveals Source of Marian Gaborik's Propensity for Injuries

A recent MRI by part-time Minnesota Wild medical consultant Dr. Arthur Wrightess has revealed one of the possible reasons why star forward Marian Gaborik is constantly besieged with injuries every season...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 11 months ago 536 reads 3 comments
The Hockey News: Who Cares About Canada?

Ken Campbell of the Hockey News posted a diatribe criticizing Montreal Canadiens president Pierre Boivin when he, as Campbell put it, “carped” about the sagging Canadian dollar. “…it was pretty pathetic” wrote Campbell..

Written by Elbow Murderpants about 11 months ago 64 reads 6 comments
Five "Burning" Questions for NHL 2008-09 (Humor)

A lot of sports pundits are presenting what they call their “Burning Questions” for this year’s NHL season...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 405 reads 2 comments
The Wave: Bees Do It! Why Can't We?

According to LiveScience Staff Writer Clara Moskowitz, and a new scientific study, bees actually do the wave! Apparently, giant honeybees are known to flip their bellies up en masse to create ...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 326 reads 4 comments
Radulov Counts His Blessings in the Russian League (Humor)

Predator-defecting forward Alexander Radulov is breathing a sigh of relief now that he has opted to play for a Russian team in their newly formed league...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 358 reads 1 comments
Mats Sundin Still Entertaining Offers, Besmirches Canucks

I pity the Vancouver Canucks. Though I hold no allegiance to the team, I do appreciate the efforts of any franchise that makes a genuine attempt to improve...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 1,395 reads 18 comments
You Can Lead A Horse to Water, But You Can't Make Him Care For Silly Human Goals

As Dan Gelston, AP sports writer noted, “Big Brown’s Triple Crown bid is finished. So is his undefeated career record...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 519 reads 6 comments
Thank you, Tiger Woods: The NHL Needed a Wake-Up Call

You know, even though I partially think Tiger Woods was kidding when he smirked, "...I don't think anyone watches hockey anymore...", I'm actually glad he said it...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 1,423 reads 11 comments
"Leafing The Old Ways Behind" or "Two Heads Are Better Than One"

The Toronto Maple Leafs’ search for a new General Manager continued today despite the recent announcement by Doug Armstrong that he would be helping out in St. Lou-eey...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 505 reads 3 comments
Olympic Hopefuls Outraged by Stolen Techniques

“Part of the secret to impressing the judges at an Olympic competition is an element of innovation and newness in the dive,” remarked USA Diving coach John Wingfield, who wished to remain anonymous...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 331 reads 0 comments
Dallas Stars: New Titles May Mean Better Performance for Organization

It's official, just months after Brett Hull And Les Jackson were named "Interim Co-General Managers" (ICGMs) of the Dallas Stars the two have been contracted to official Co-GM status until the Buck Rogers year of 2011...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 492 reads 0 comments
Pete Forsberg, Adam Foote Return: Avalanche Learning from Past, or Repeating It?

In a time when most NHL teams are trying to move forward, (albeit slowly in the case of some -See NY Islanders) The Colorado Avalanche seem to be taking steps backwards...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 610 reads 12 comments
Vancouver Canucks: Their first steps to greatness!

July is coming quickly and many teams in the NHL will be tasked with re-tooling, re-signing and re-deluding. For some teams, the future is bright—this includes Philadelphia, Nashville, Washington, Montreal and Chicago...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 1,099 reads 1 comments
Marty Turco, No More Clichés: New Expressions for Brink-of-Elimination Games

I cringed and suffered a wave of sincere disappointment after game three of the Dallas/Detroit playoff series. Not because the Stars lost, (though that WAS a shame)...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 428 reads 0 comments
Shrink Equipment, Maximize Goals—New Ways NHL Will Improve Scoring

Along with smaller equipment and bigger goals, here are some brilliant ways the NHL can continue to meddle with the game to improve scoring and ultimately send millions of non-hockey fans stampeding to the games like crazed lemmings...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 336 reads 2 comments
Marty Can't Win - Mo Can't Lose

Marty Turco can’t win. And I don’t mean against the Detroit Red Wings. I mean he can’t win with the Dallas media and fans...

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 384 reads 0 comments
Conflicting Views on NHL Goaltending Are Headed for a Day of Reckoning

Despite the NHL's Herculean efforts to "trick-up" the game and force-feed hockey to the baseball, football, and basketball masses; lovers of a good ol' net minder battle have been treated to some wonderful displays in both this year's playoffs and 2007's.

Written by Elbow Murderpants about about 1 year ago 720 reads 4 comments

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Elbow Murderpants Article Archive

Anyone Smell A Comeback For The NHL?

Team Canada Early Picks Seem Myopic

Nominal Moves by Nieuwendyk Raise Questions on Tippett Dismissal

Pros Score On Olympic Stage

Dallas Stars: 08/09 Season Threatens to Burn Out Early

MRI Reveals Source of Marian Gaborik's Propensity for Injuries

The Hockey News: Who Cares About Canada?

Five "Burning" Questions for NHL 2008-09 (Humor)

The Wave: Bees Do It! Why Can't We?

Radulov Counts His Blessings in the Russian League (Humor)

Mats Sundin Still Entertaining Offers, Besmirches Canucks

You Can Lead A Horse to Water, But You Can't Make Him Care For Silly Human Goals

Thank you, Tiger Woods: The NHL Needed a Wake-Up Call

"Leafing The Old Ways Behind" or "Two Heads Are Better Than One"

Olympic Hopefuls Outraged by Stolen Techniques

Dallas Stars: New Titles May Mean Better Performance for Organization

Pete Forsberg, Adam Foote Return: Avalanche Learning from Past, or Repeating It?

Vancouver Canucks: Their first steps to greatness!

Marty Turco, No More Clichés: New Expressions for Brink-of-Elimination Games

Shrink Equipment, Maximize Goals—New Ways NHL Will Improve Scoring

Marty Can't Win - Mo Can't Lose

Conflicting Views on NHL Goaltending Are Headed for a Day of Reckoning

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