1. The Tennis Top Ten's Suggested Book Titles

    When I think about the men who hold the top ten rankings in tennis, I wonder what kind of books they would later come out with to sell their memoirs or just to share their experiences with the general public...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 795 reads 13 comments

  2. Wimbledon 2053 Highlights (Humor)

    Roger Federer 71, captured his 35th Wimbledon title by defeating Andy Roddick JR. in a straight-sets victory. Federer who has barely slowed down in thirty years was still spry enough to beat Andy Roddick's son 6-4, 6-3, 6-4...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 723 reads 5 comments

  3. Queen Elizabeth Solves British Tennis Draught (Humor)

    The Queen invited 6-time Wimbledon Champ Roger Federer to a hastily-organized press conference. She wasted no time in getting to her speech. Queen Elizabeth II: Dear Members of Royalty, Beloved British paparazzi and of course the general public...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 524 reads 2 comments

  4. Andy Roddick Defeats Andy Murray—And Slaps British Media in the Face

    When you're British and get boastful and ahead of yourself, there is nothing like a headstrong American to put you in your place. Andy Roddick beat Andy Murray today in Wimbledon 6-4, 4-6, 7-6, 7-6 in a close and tight match...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 820 reads 20 comments

  5. See No Ivo; Hear No Ivo: A Humorous Tennis Bedtime Story

    As read to a five-year old at bedtime. Once upon a time, in the kingdom of Croatia, the great magician Merlinic was casting a spell to make the world's greatest tennis player. Make him tall, make him strong...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 337 reads 6 comments

  6. Roger Federer's Reflections On Michael Jackson's Passing (Satire)

    After Roger Federer's successful match against Philipp Kohlschreiber today, he went to the side of the court to field some questions with a reporter...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 1,645 reads 10 comments

  7. Ferris Spinkleman: The Star-Struck Celebrity Gazer

    Ferris Spinkleman is a 35-year-old American who never graduated from high school, never married and probably never will. He is of medium-height and chubby with thinning, blonde hair, and he wears thick-rimmed Buddy Holly glasses...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 226 reads 9 comments

  8. Robert Orzechowski Inks Two-Year, $3.5 Million Deal with B/R (Humor)

    Sports satire writer Robert Orzechowski has agreed to a two-year contract to write exclusively for BleacherReport.com for a reported $3.5 million. The contract included a third-year option to renew...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 125 reads 9 comments

  9. Tennis Players Answering Machines

    If one were by miracle to obtain every tennis star's answering machine, what would be on there? Tennis players like all people, insert their own personality into recording their message for their cell and home phone numbers...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 503 reads 15 comments

  10. Rafael Nadal Will Be Missed at Wimbledon 2009

    At the time of this writing, Rafael Nadal has just announced that he will not be competing at Wimbledon. As a Roger Federer fan, I was surprised at my own reaction to this news which was reacting to a loss...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 849 reads 13 comments

  11. Andre Agassi Embarrassed By "Mini-Me" Star (Satire)

    Andre Agassi got more than he bargained for when he took celebrity small man Verne Troy to the "Annual Celebrity Father And Son Picnic". Agassi was perplexed by Troy's constant skirt-chasing and heavy drinking ways...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 401 reads 3 comments

  12. Rafael Nadal Bows Out, Roger Federer Wins Wimbledon By Default (Satire)

    With Rafael Nadal making the final announcement that he would not compete in Wimbledon due to knee problems, Roger Federer picked up his sixth Wimbledon without even raising his racket...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 2,063 reads 15 comments

  13. Tennis Showertime Songs

    Showertime! Yes that glorious time where we as dirty filthy human beings step into the cleansing booth and return ourselves into the original clean machines that we are supposed to be...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 316 reads 9 comments

  14. Star Trek Episode: The Federer Salvage

    Captain Kirk (Spoken in pauses and quick sentences): Captain's Log Stardate 0423157 point 2. The Enterprise has gone through time travel back to 2009 to investigate a possible malfunction of one...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 463 reads 9 comments

  15. Andy Murray's Pre-Wimbledon Press Conference in London (Humor)

    Fresh after his victory at the Stella Artois Tournament, Andy Murray parked his large trophy on the desk and met with the British press. Here is what transpired: Reporter 1: Thank you, and congratulations Andy on your victory this week...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 834 reads 13 comments

  16. Tomorrow's Tennis Star

    Hush little one Today is done and your sleep beckons Let your dreams receive you warmly And guide you to your course in life Where you will play amongst your toddling neighbors At the ...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 325 reads 3 comments

  17. Fernando Verdasco Wins Mother Nature Masters (Humor)

    Fernando Verdasco has won his first tournament of 2009, the Mother Nature Masters on the Greek island of Lesbos. Equipped with just his tennis racket and a set of balls, Verdasco powered his ...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 483 reads 7 comments

  18. Crosby's Stills, Gnash 'em Young!

    The "Crosby Show" has had it a little rough in this final series. Whatever the results on Friday, I would like to pay homage to one of this era's brightest hockey stars - Syd The kid...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 205 reads 6 comments

  19. Roger Federer's Letters of Congratulations

    Some surprising letters came in for Roger Federer upon winning his fourteenth grand-slam. Yes, I know what you are thinking. More celebrities saying more stupid, idiotic things. However, this time I added a little twist...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 2,775 reads 32 comments

  20. The Nadals Consult a Medicine Man (Humor)

    Tony Nadal was impatient. "Vamos, Rafa! We are going to miss di appointment!" Behind him Rafael Nadal hobbled along grimacing in pain. Tony Nadal: Now let me do all the talking. I paid a lat of money so we could see dis specialist...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 530 reads 2 comments

  21. B/R Press Conference With French Open Winner Roger Federer (Satire)

    A large group of Bleacher Report reporters were given an exclusive closed press conference with 2009 French Open champion Roger Federer. Federer arrived promptly at 4 p.m. local time to field questions from the B/R group...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 709 reads 8 comments

  22. Roger Federer: "Where Is the @#&*$# Cheque?"

    After all the media covering the French Open had packed up to leave, Roger Federer was still yet to leave the stadium. He had fought hard and won the French Open but another matter was still unsettled...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 1,105 reads 1 comments

  23. The Bandwagon Fan: Fake Federer Fans

    When Roger Federer wins, he has multitudes of fans. He is adored by all who want to share in his cup-raising glories from Wimbledon to New York to Melbourne and Paris. It seems that everyone has claimed a spot on the bandwagon...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 1,721 reads 11 comments

  24. French Open Quotes: Rob's Top 10 List

    The 2009 French Open will be known for mostly Rafael Nadal exiting in the fourth round after being defeated in four sets by Robin Soderling. Here are a few photos from the Open that I have decided to add some captions to...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 878 reads 10 comments

  25. New Show BTPE (Best Tennis Player Ever) Part I (humor)

    Paris Hilton: Hi, I am Paris and you may know me from that great television show Simple Life or my wonderful show BFF or even British BFF for those who live far away from me. I have hot news...

    Robert  Orzechowski Written by Robert Orzechowski about 5 years ago 228 reads 8 comments