Bleacher Report - Articles by Hao Meng

Battle to the End—Athlete's Edition: Who Will Survive?

Hao Meng — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 19:58:02 -0400

To my dismay, the quality of reality television has plummeted recently—far from the glory days of the early 2000s.

Now, you might scoff at my concern over things of such insignificance, but I’m not afraid to admit that I like my “trash TV” to be “quality trash TV.”

The current nonsense of Dancing with the (Burnt-out C-List) Stars and Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader (a resounding NO in my case) just doesn’t cut it anymore.

Even the brilliant Survivor has lost a bit of its flair, thanks to ineffective rule changes and some unbelievably boring contestants.

Call me childish, but I just couldn’t take it anymore. I needed an outlet, so I made one.

So without further ado, I’d like to introduce the hypothetical, but strangely fascinating, Survivor: Sports World—a reality TV show starring Shaq, Dikembe Mutombo, Dennis Rodman, Charles Barkley, Jay Culter, Brett Favre, T.O., Manny, David Beckham, and Michael Phelps that combines all aspects of reality TV.

Here’s an “unbiased” account of what would likely transpire in this wonderfully wacky competition.

Best Introduction: “Hello, I’m Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo.”

Most Appropriate Song Choice for American Idol-like Singing Contest: Big Girls Don’t Cry—a song by Fergie, interpreted by Terrell Owens.

Best Dance Contest Moment: Shaq breaks it down with some top-notch popping, but is defeated by Brett Favre constantly jumping up and down with arms raised and index fingers pointed at the sky.

Bravest Moment in Fear Factor-like Contest: Jay Cutler shows no fear in “receiving” and eating “wide” Bear “droppings.”

Most Popular Wife Swap-like Contest Contestant: David Beckham. Dennis Rodman, and his wife—Dennis Rodman—come in a close second.

Most Embarrassing Moment: During Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader-like contest, Dikembe Mutombo, of all people, corrects Charles Barkley on the pronunciation and spelling of the word “terrible.” Charles proceeds to say “I am a dumb*ss” without reading off a teleprompter.

First to Leave the Island: With 14 Olympic Gold Medals, Michael Phelps wasn’t really motivated to do well. That, and there were no Mary Janes on the island.

Second to Leave the Island: David Beckham, obviously. If your wife looked like this, would you choose to stay on an island with smelly men for three months?

Most Painful Moment: The producers, in an attempt to garner more attention for the show, host a Temptation Island-like contest where contestants who refuse their personalized “temptation item” earn extra money. The temptation items are as follows:

Shaq—Kobe Voodoo Doll and endless supply of needles

Mutombo—The Sorcerer’s Stone (See Harry Potter for clarification)

Dennis Rodman—Karl Malone

Charles Barkley—Frank Caliendo

Jay Cutler—Mike Shanahan

Brett Favre—Another “Get out of Retirement Free” Card

T.O.—A third consecutive MVP Award for McDonald’s All-Star Celebrity Basketball Game

Manny—The wife version of Scott Boras

Beckham—A 12-pack

Michael Phelps—A Kellogg’s Box with his face on it again

All succumb to temptation. Sad.

Manny Being Manny Moment One: Manny refuses to participate in the Who Wants to Be a Millionaire-like contest. He claims, through his agent Scott Boras, that he would, however, participate in a Who Wants to Be a Billionaire-like contest.

Manny Being Manny Moment Two: Manny refuses to participate in the Amazing Race-like contest because water bottles are neither free nor guaranteed during the contest. Manny then cites his experiences in Fenway Park’s Left Field as support for his request.

Best On-Camera Diss:

“Shaq, Kobe is better than you now—I hope you know that.” – Jay Cutler

“Jay, Philip Rivers has always been better than you. You’re too dumb to know that.” —Shaq

Most Sentimental Moment: Barkley reveals that Favre and T.O. are among his “Fav Five.” Favre and T.O. proceed to cry with joy, while Cutler—feeling left out—proceeds to cry in jealousy.

Best Bachelorette-like Contest Moment: The producers invite Anna Kournikova to be the bachelorette. She ends up choosing Charles Barkley as her ultimate suitor. When asked to explain her choice, Kournikova replied, “I want to love someone who’s a lot like me.” We can only assume she’s referring to the couple’s current athletic ability.

Most Surprising Moment: After producers announce an opening for an Extreme Makeover, everyone is shocked to see David Beckham fervently fight for the spot. Apparently, if Beckham doesn’t keep up with Posh Spice in the number of plastic surgeries undergone, a divorce is imminent.

Most Inspirational Moment: Dennis Rodman gracefully glides across a Project Runway-like runway in his beautiful wedding dress like someone who has finally found a long-lost passion.

Best America is Better than Britain Moment: David Beckham kicks his trademark bending kick, only to have the shot blocked by Shaq’s massive fist.

Best “I Love These Guys” Moment: During an America’s Got Talent-like talent contest, the contestants show off some little-known talents:

Shaq—Rapping without degrading Kobe

Mutombo—Playing volleyball

Dennis Rodman—Hair styling

Charles Barkley—Pulling the slot machine

Jay Cutler—Not getting mad at Peyton Manning for nearly killing him

Brett Favre—Ignoring his backups

T.O.—Writing a “How-To Guide” for TD celebrations

Manny—Writing a “How-To Guide” for being Manny

Beckham—Doing nothing and looking good

Michael Phelps—Being the link between humans and fish

Winner of the Show: Umm, Ryan Seacrest?

Great, now I feel a lot better.

Take a Lesson from Michael Jordan: It's OK To Cry

Hao Meng — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 19:28:04 -0400

Last week, in a fit of pre-teen high school nostalgia, my “manly” college brethren and I decided to describe the perfect girl—you know, the one who would cause us to forever disregard the (slightly sexist/inappropriate) adage, “Bros before h**s.”

While our choices varied drastically, ranging from “sophisticated” to “clean nails,” there were hardly any major objections, and, thankfully, no mentions of “extraordinary farting ability” or “smooth leg hair.”

I was thrilled at how much fun we were having (and feeling slightly too girly), so I decided to continue the roundtable discussion by describing the perfect athlete.

One by one, I spouted out those characteristics we all strive for.

“They’ve got to be blisteringly fast, Hulk-like strong, and have Ryan Fitzpatrick's Ivy League IQ.” My friends nodded in agreement.

“Oh, and they can’t be afraid to cry.”

This time, they laughed until they cried.

Who ever heard of a perfect athlete crying?

Well, me.

I don’t know if I’m breaking some forbidden mold by writing this, but in my book, the perfect athlete isn’t afraid to shed tears—to have streams of emotion pour from his/her eyes, in both happiness and sorrow.

For, undeniably, hidden far beneath the frustrating layers of greed and selfishness, the foundation of sports is still one built around passion and emotion. It’s so often easy to forget such a simple fact—especially when the cynical business side of sports constantly suffocates us with its intensity and volume.

Too often, we’ll see professional athletes lose an important game and move on like nothing bad had ever occurred. After all, why show any emotion when you still get the massive paycheck? And why care about the team’s loss when your personal statistics are good enough to nab another superfluous contract?

Why? Frankly, that’s a question that’s becoming harder and harder to answer. You used to be able to emphatically answer, “passion,” or “a genuine love for the game,” and people would cheer alongside you, proud and honored to be by a fellow fan who also appreciated the impeccable zeal of athletes.

Nowadays, it’s a shrug and an “oh well” attitude. It’s a world with Tony Romos who shrug off losses because their Jessica Simpson is waiting at home.

It’s too many Manny’s who care more about selling a grill on eBay than trying not to strikeout against Mariano Rivera.

And it’s not enough Kevin Garnetts who proudly leave their heart on their sleeve.

Ultimately, it’s nothing short of a shame.

There is nothing we need more now than for professional athletes to show us that they’re people, just like us, and that they fully understand how fortunate they are to be playing a game for a living, while the ordinary citizen gets by in jobs of necessity, not ones they necessarily love, to ensure their family has food the next day.

Some of us can’t pick the job we want because of financial limitations. Professional athletes, however, can. They get to experience the ups and downs of their careers without too much concern for their financial futures—all the while playing games they’ve loved since childhood.

All I ask from them is that they simply share that joy with us, and let us know that they care and treasure the opportunities and privileges they’ve worked so hard to earn.

Give the rest of us a taste of what it’s like to have genuine passion—unaffected by monetary pressures—merge itself in a career. Let us know you’re not just doing it for the fame and riches.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m by no means advocating sports over life itself. I certainly respect people like Romo and Manny for putting winning and losing into the bigger context of life. Indeed, the sun comes up tomorrow regardless of how the fourth quarter went.

But, don’t refuse to care about the results of your career simply because you’ve got fame and money tucked away in your back pocket. Instead, take advantage of the privileges you have, and completely immerse yourself in your job and your love.

Do what very few of us can do—love your career and care about its accomplishments—and you’ll receive our undying support and respect.

Why?

Because we all remember what it was like to be upset after losing a pickup football game and not having appetite for that night’s dinner.

Because we all remember being on our knees, our hands on the mound after giving up a walk-off homer.

And because we all remember being tossed in the air, with no idea of what was happening, after hitting a game-winning three.

As kids, we experienced all that, and we were never afraid of tearing up to console our grief or celebrate our happiness.

And that’s why we loved Michael Jordan, the undeniable ruler of air. His grace, talent, and godliness were enhanced each and every time he wept openly when holding the Larry O’Brien Trophy and appreciated all the more with every sign of frustration during meaningless regular-season games.

He not only cared and loved the game unconditionally, but he shared it with all of us, and for that we loved him.

Nobody dared called MJ a sissy. Nobody dared question his manliness or his passion.

He was the man, and boy, he might be the closest thing to a perfect athlete in my lifetime.

In hindsight, I really should have used MJ as an example instead of quoting, “The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears,” when defending my choice to my friends.

Yet, either way, I stand by my assessment of the perfect athlete, and I have a small hunch that Brett Favre, Tiger Woods, and Cristiano Ronaldo would all agree.

MLB Nightmares: How Bad Can It Get? (Humor)

Hao Meng — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 19:41:04 -0400

Today, I woke up and thought to myself, “It’s going to be a bad day. Worst-case scenario, I’ll be late for my midterm, spill juice over my favorite shirt, and somehow lock myself out.”

So, being the clairvoyant master I am, I left for my midterm extra early, wore the ugliest t-shirt I had, and made sure to stuff my key deep into my jeans.

All was good, right?

Far from it.

Being the die-hard Cubs fan I am, I instead flunked my midterm, ran into the cute girl I’ve been trying to impress, and brought the wrong key.

Apparently, I’m a better Cubs fan than a psychic.

Which means I get to experience the joy of reaching the same “are-you-kidding-me-F-my-life” end through some revolutionary, state-of-the-art means.

All. The. Time.

So with baseball season approaching, I thought I’d spread that lovely, bubbly feeling to as many people as possible by looking at all 30 MLB teams and finding some creative ways for them to fail. Kind of like a worst-case-scenario guidebook, if you will.

I know it’s not yet Christmas, but I’m just so ecstatic about life that I can’t help it.

Here’s to the continued success of enjoying failure in as many unique ways as possible:

Atlanta Braves

Talk about a successful offseason, eh? Unless Tom Glavine nostalgically cries whenever he pitches (“Where are my BFFs Greg and Johnny?”), Bobby Cox hears Jake Peavy’s voice at night, and every Braves player switches to Rafael Furcal’s agent, the regular season won’t be as fun to experience.

Arizona Diamondbacks

I hear Mark Reynolds is afraid his historic MLB record is going to be broken, so he’s working hard to ensure that he bests it this year.

Fortunately for the Diamondbacks, Chris Young, Justin Upton, Stephen Drew, and Chris Snyder are all jealous and hungry, so they’ll be chasing that same record.

If anything, economics has taught me that competition is good for society, so I assume it's applicable to strikeouts too.

Baltimore Orioles

Wouldn’t it be great if the Yankees, Red Sox, Blue Jays, and Rays realized that the Orioles were in their division? I have no doubt that they’d go to Bud Selig and ask for rescheduling that’ll allow them each to play that fun Orioles team many, many more times. Just for fun, of course.

Boston Red Sox

Tim Wakefield is such a classy pitcher. I think the rest of the Sox pitching staff has finally realized that this offseason, which means that they’re all attempting to become pure knuckleballers.

While this is fantastic news for all of Red Sox Nation, it’s especially gratifying for fans with season seats on the Green Monster. Getting souvenirs shouldn’t be a problem for them.

Chicago White Sox

Wait, did I just hear that correctly? A.J. Pierzynski punched Ozzie, and Ozzie didn’t say a single potty word? South Siders, your team needs to shape up. Now.

Cincinnati Reds

I’m kind of confused here. I thought I didn’t have to write one for this team because they didn’t have any pitchers who could pitch anymore. Didn’t Dusty Baker take care of that?

Cleveland Indians

Don’t fear, Indians fans, there will be no repeat of 2008. LeBron James can play baseball, too! Wait, there’s more—he can play all nine positions at once, and he’s willing to do so as long as the semi-offensive mascot of yours is replaced by an endless supply of rosin. Get on it!

Colorado Rockies

Why are you guys watching this team instead of climbing it (credited to Pete McKeown)? It would be much more exciting, and you might be much more in shape.

Detroit Tigers

Oh, the blessing of being in the same city as the Lions.

Florida Marlins

Maybe this team will relocate to Detroit? Heck, anyplace but in Florida—the land where baseball dies. Wyoming would work, too.

Houston Astros

The best steroids story in baseball isn’t A-Rod; it’s watching the evolution of Miguel Tejada as a player. I don’t know about you, but it’s almost like human evolution—just backwards. Fortunately for Astros fans, they might be getting another such visually-stimulating player in Pudge.

Kansas City Royals

If you’re a fan, the best thing you can hope for is that experts start calling you the “Arizona Cardinals” of baseball this season. Meaning? That you’ll suck for three to four more years before miraculously making the World Series.

Los Angeles Angels

Oh, no! Tex and K-Rod are gone! Whatever will you do? Win the West and then lose in the first round of the playoffs.

Los Angeles Dodgers

Manny puts his left leg in (you cheer). He puts his left leg out (you gasp). He puts his left leg in (you cheer), and shakes it all about (you hyperventilate). He does the “I’m gonna manipulate you Dodgers fans all season long,” and turns himself around. That’s what it’s all about.

Milwaukee Brewers

The fear coming out of Milwaukee is that with CC gone, Prince Fielder alone won’t be able to retain the “Heaviest Team” award for the Brew Crew. On the bright side, perhaps Fielder will be unbelievably motivated to re-“gain” the award after firing his personal trainer, that Subway Guy.

Minnesota Twins

From the movie Little Big League:

Jim Bowers: It’s a scientific fact that a pig becomes a hog at 180 pounds.

Spencer Hamilton: What’s that make your wife?

Tucker Kain: Fat.

Oh, if only the Twins were that refreshing...

New York Mets

I can’t think of anything bad that’ll happen to this team, because I actually think they’ve got it made. Hmm, I guess I said the same thing last year and the year before. Go figure.

New York Yankees

Upper Right-Hand Picture

Oakland Athletics

Billy Beane sure regrets writing that book with that silly philosophy. Having young, undiscovered talent is just so overrated—especially when you can replace them with Nomar “I can’t believe my body still holds up without steroids” Garciaparra.

Philadelphia Phillies

Didn’t Chase Utley have the same injury A-Rod is currently recovering from? Maybe he’ll turn into A-Rod soon. That’s exactly what the city of Philadelphia needs—their own A-Rod. That and a Cole Hamels with a deeper voice.

Pittsburgh Pirates

Name a player on this team. You can’t, can you? It’s kind of like that game where you have to list the 50 states—you think you can do it, but really, you can’t. It’s impossible.

San Diego Padres

If Mark Prior goes the entire year without breaking something, it’s only because he’s transferred his curse onto someone else. Like Jake Peavy (I mean, he wanted to go to the Cubs; what do you expect?).

San Francisco Giants

Bonds. Barry Bonds.

You know you want to say it.

Seattle Mariners

If Mariners fans are lucky, they’ll get to see Sleepless in Seattle II: Magical Reunion with Griffey.

St. Louis Cardinals

All you Cardinals fans, you remember this sign? You all get free copies at the first home game.

Tampa Bay Rays

OK, so not all baseball dies out in Florida. So what? The Rays still won’t win the World Series this year. Geez.

Texas Rangers

Just like with Barry, say it with me: Sosa. Sammy So...o...o...ah...choo!

Toronto Blue Jays

Maybe the US will annex Canada and the Jays will finally feel like they fit in, along with the other 29 teams struggling to survive in our marsh-pit of an economy.

Washington Nationals

President Obama gets hooked on the Nationals, which results in his abandonment of any important governmental duties. Who am I kidding? Even Aaron Burr wouldn’t do that (pardon the bad history allusion/joke).

Chicago Cubs

It was only appropriate that I end with them. After hours and hours of deep, profound pondering, I’ve finally devised a brilliant scenario through which the Cubs could fail.

It’s called, “Keep Doing What You’re Doing.”

Yao Ming: Why the World Should Thank the "Great Wall of China"

Hao Meng — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 17:28:19 -0400

Growing up, my friends called me Yao Ming.

To them, I was a splendid freak of nature—a 6'4" Chinese kid who somehow got misplaced in the country-music paradise called Alabama. None of my comrades had seen the likes of me, so they wisely took one look at my rhythmically-appealing name, and without hesitation, decided to call me "Yao"—or as they explained it, my cousin's name.

At first, I suppose I was flattered by the association. After all, Yao had been drafted No. 1 by the Houston Rockets; so how could I not be honored? I rightly took it as a compliment.

However, I hadn’t even seen Yao in action, so I wasn’t completely certain.

My own NBA aspirations had ended when I’d realized professional basketball rims weren’t actually placed at a dunk-friendly height of seven feet, leaving me desperately looking for a player I could watch and live through vicariously.

Enter Yao Ming.

Yet, after watching Yao play that first year, I wasn't so sure I’d found the right NBA player to be named after.

It certainly doesn't say volumes about me if my favorite player, a 7'6" beast, has trouble finishing around the rim, gets out-rebounded and blocked by shorter players, and runs like a three-legged giraffe.

Even after watching Yao for eight years, I still can't deny he possesses a knack for embarrassing moments. Being posterized by Andre Iguodala is semi-acceptable, but having the 5'9" Nate Robinson block your dunk attempt for the third time in his career is nothing short of pitiful.

Moments like those are what give critics the ammunition needed to label Yao Overrated.

They acknowledge his career 19.1 PPG, 9.2 RPG, .524 FG percentage, and .832 FT percentage, but argue that for a man of his physical gifts, Yao should be much more of a dominating force—especially when trying to dunk on a guy nearly two feet shorter.

Even as a Houston Rockets fan, I agreed—that is, until I stopped obsessing over numbers and remembered to appreciate the intricacies of one of the best team sports ever.

For beyond all the numbers and hoopla that surrounds the nasty dunks and shameful blocks, Yao is as much an under-appreciated center as he is an ambassador of humility, selflessness, and heart; not only for the sport of basketball, but the world.

In a league where flashy dunks and boisterous mouths are lionized, Yao continues to be a model student of the game. He's never been a player who puts himself above the team. He’s never agonized over his personal statistics. Instead, he does whatever he can to help the team win. He's more than willing to make that extra pass and to set an unnoticed pick for a slashing teammate.

You'll never find Yao trash-talking after a glamorous dunk. Nor will you find him complaining over a lack of playing time. Instead, you'll see Yao be the first to jump off the bench to applaud a seldom-used teammate—even when the game is all but over. He's one of the most respectful guys in the game—leading to even Shaq calling him a "classy guy."

Off the court, it's much the same. Despite undeniable fame, he's never allowed it to go to his head. He's not that guy who'll pull a "drunken Sir Charles," fraternize with drugs or exotic women, or define his athletic success by his income.

No, he's the type to lift and plant sod during a rainy All-Star weekend in New Orleans, to be recognized by the United Nations for his contributions to the fight against AIDS, and to not only donate $2 million after the tragic 2008 Sichuan earthquake, but to also approach the NBA about doing a public service announcement during NBA games.

I realize that Yao's kindness and selflessness are often used as ammunition against him. Indeed, critics love to point to Yao's lack of toughness and fire as key reasons why he'll never be as great or as dominating as Shaq.

They're absolutely right. Yao will never be as extraordinary as Shaq’s been during his career. But then again, nobody in the near future will be.

Yet, we must understand that comparing Yao to Shaq is, for a lack of a better analogy, like comparing apples and oranges.

Whereas Shaq is, in the purest sense, an entertainer and dominator of the game, Yao is the game's ambassador—a hard-working, thoughtful, and courageous pioneer who has taken greater responsibilities than any one man should ever be required to take.

Bigger, more important forces are at work here, for Yao's significance as a player and individual goes far beyond the limits of two baskets and a court; it's global in every sense of the word.

Imagine living the first 20 or so years of your life in a country and culture that, from the bottom up, is built upon a lack of individuality, self-achievement, and exploration of the unknown. You've immersed yourself in that culture, slowly growing into a polite, caring, and congenial young man.

Yet, you're different, very different. With an unbelievable natural gift and talent, you're the one who stands out, the one who seemingly holds the honor, pride, and opportunity of over a billion people in the palm of his hands. By and large, your success is the success of an entire nation.

Do you take the challenge?

Yao did, and there are no words I can string together that would do justice to how much respect his actions deserve.

Perhaps Yao's words will help. From his memoir, YAO: A Life in Two Worlds:

"I don’t know how American fans think, but in China if you score 30, the fans want you to score 40. If you score 40, they want 50. After my first NBA season, the Chinese newspapers were talking about how many years it will be before I win a championship, how many years before I am the league MVP.

This is what makes me think about failing. These are very big goals, but I will be looked on as a failure if I don’t reach them. I could tell you that what other people think is not important to me, but that’s not true. I have this chance to play in the NBA because of a lot of people. I don’t want to disappoint them. It would be easier if I didn’t care about them, but that’s not how I am.

I think differently about failure than a lot of Chinese. In China, many people won’t try to do something if there’s not a high chance of success. Whether I win or lose, I think I can get a lot from the process of doing something. I can be afraid to fail or lose, but I can’t let my fear stop me from trying."

Failure, to Yao, is not about losing money on a potential long-term deal next season, nor is it about losing "street-cred" during the next trash-talk session.

It's about letting down an entire nation of people.

And yet, Yao has never whined—not when he's gone back to China during the summer to train with the national team, when everyone else gets time to relax and recuperate. And Yao has never passed blame—not when Houston has consistently lost in the first round of the playoffs.

He's carried himself with class, worked relentlessly to improve his game, and gone about it all with passion, honor, and joy.

And it showed during the US-China 2008 Olympic match, which was perhaps the most epitomic moment of Yao's career up to this point.

A short time after recovering from a foot injury, Yao, with hands on his hips and gasping for breath as he heroically limped from courtside to courtside, played with all his heart to represent the people and the nation that had poured their trust into him. He only shot 3-for-10, but the passion and toughness he displayed were awe-inspiring.

The best moment? A Yao Ming three-pointer that opened the game—delivering chills and roars down every admirer's spine.

"I felt honored to be there watching that," Chris Paul said.

Personally, I have no doubt that Yao's contributions to the game are still under-appreciated. How could they not be when the NBA is all about flash, power, and dominance?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not clamoring for Yao to be MVP. However, if there were a Most Valuable Human award, I'd give it to Yao in a second.

Regardless of whether you're a Yao Ming fan, I hope you come to appreciate what he's done for the sport of basketball. He's brilliantly taken two cultures that couldn't be more different and brought them together in love for the same sport.

In the process, he's showed us why he's nothing short of a stand-up guy full of decency and courage unmatched by many in this world.

As Kobe Bryant would say, "Yao's built the bridge for all of us."

What a wonderful bridge that is, not only for the sport of basketball, but for the different cultures of this world.

Thank you, Yao.

What an honor it is to share your name.

The Love of the Game: Why We Need Sports Now More Than Ever

Hao Meng — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:54:55 -0500

Kids are more misguided than ever these days.

Social success is now measured by their number of Facebook friends (guilty as charged), life lessons are taught through weekly episodes of Gossip Girl, and songs worth listening to must include profound messages to “Superman dat hoe” or “lick like a lollipop.”

The cultural direction that we, as a society, are providing these kids is troubling, and the situation and its implications are not much different in sports.

In competitive sports, it’s certainly not difficult to find your fair share of kids with unrealistic goals. They’re the ones that—despite their lack of athleticism—strive to one day elevate like LeBron James, run like Adrian Peterson, or swim like Michael Phe—I mean, a blazed fish.

Most of them won’t ever make it big, but there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Since grade school, when we could barely decipher the difference between running to first base and running to third, we’ve been told to aim high and dream big.

Our wonderful teachers hadn’t yet corrupted us with visions of fame and fortune. Instead, we were taught to make the most of our lives, work hard, and be proud of whatever we could achieve—even if we fell well short of our goals.

Many of us took those words to heart, especially when it came to sports. Before we could figure out the complex intricacies of multi-variable calculus or memorize the shapes of all 20 amino acids, life simply gave us a variety of balls, hoops, and goals—treasures we had no trouble understanding.

We would take those balls, learn to toss them through hoops or hit them with bats, and, over time, come to learn the profound concepts of determination, comradeship, and success in the face of adversity.

In hindsight, we probably didn’t fully appreciate what we had learned, but that certainly didn’t stop us from playing the game.

From soaking in the joy of running through disgusting mud just for the chance of catching an “imperfectly perfect” spiral.

From gleefully kissing the concrete floor after miraculously hitting a half-court game-winner in a pick-up game with no spectators.

From remembering the feeling of hitting a baseball into grandma’s yard and stepping on every pizza box and every door mat that acted as home plate.

And from loving every moment of it.

As a result, our unashamed proclamations of becoming the next M.J. or Brett Favre almost never came from our bloodthirsty visions of riches and eminence.

Instead, they were a product of a pure and genuine love for not only a game but a microcosm of the life we should all lead.

For, you see, the horrible disease plaguing sports today is not the unrealistic expectations of aspiring athletes. No, it’s the irresponsible pressure our society has placed on kids to meet those expectations, by any and all means, in a sports world growing evermore cynical and competitive.

It’s a world becoming more and more of a potpourri of business transactions, where success, and only success, is acceptable in the grand scheme of things. And while I certainly understand and expect my favorite athletes to achieve success, it shouldn’t be at the expense of morals and values any fifth grader can appreciate.

After all, what kind of message are we sending to aspiring athletes when some of our most talented baseball players, like A-Rod, value success so much that they consciously make a decision to not only cheat through steroids but to lie about it?

How can an innocent boy playing shortstop in middle school not start to believe that, in the “real world,” fear of failure allows “wrong” to trump “right?”

It’s a real world where sports are littered with selfish players, like T.O, who believe that preposterously high contracts are the only appropriate measure of success. A world where supposed role models like Stephen Marbury recently made around $20 million for sitting pretty on his rear, while people get laid off at unprecedented numbers.

Without making tens of millions and causing controversies left and right, these players fear that they’ll end up as a commoner among the masses.

The thought of actually helping the masses—especially in a time of such troubling economic crisis—never really seems to cross their minds.

Sadly, greed galore has replaced the pure and genuine love for the game. Also gone, without a trace of regret, are the lessons of teamwork and honor they once learned as kids.

Don’t get me wrong. I realize that professional sports is a business that needs to produce success and make money in order to survive.

Nonetheless, that doesn’t mean athletes and owners should so blatantly take advantage of the situation they’re in and disregard the responsibility they have as role models for future generations.

Frankly, our world is cynical enough that the last thing we need is for our childhood joys to be regular displays of greed and corruption. Like so many brilliant people have said before, sports are—in the best sense of the word—an escape from the daily troubles and problems of everyday life.

As kids, that’s why we loved to play sports. We didn’t have to worry about our homework or our chores; we could simply lose ourselves in games that, whether we knew it, taught us so many lessons about the values and morals of life.

To see irresponsible and selfish athletes throw all that away is a problem that overshadows any issues surrounding any free-agent signing, broken record, or shift in the standings.

It’s a problem that reflects all the bigger problems our imperfect society faces today, and more directly, one that creates the obstacles facing young aspiring athletes.

With the recent developments surrounding Marquis Cooper and Corey Smith, about which my friend Robert Allred wrote a fantastic article here, our efforts to bring back the humanity, joy, and value of sports are all the more important.

Life is fragile, and the best thing we can do is make sure that its good aspects, like sports, stay that way.

And if we do so, maybe the next generation of kids will all have a copy of Rudy in their room.

This article was first featured in The Harvard Independent.

What's Wrong with Derrek Lee? A Look at the Chicago Cubs Star's Batting Woes

Hao Meng — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 10:39:20 -0500

Like most Cubs fans, I’ve learned to embrace irrationality with all my heart.

I embrace it regularly and relentlessly, never hesitating to use it as my inner sanctuary when things in Cubs world become unreasonably depressing, which frankly, is an occurrence as common as a Mark Reynolds strikeout.

It’s helped me to not only accept Steve Bartman as a truly fictional character, but also to believe that, one day, Albert Pujols will terrorize the Cardinals in a Cubs jersey.

And for a while, it became the driving force behind my fading support for star Cubs first baseman, Derrek Lee.

That’s unreasonable, you might cry.

Groundless, foolish, and perhaps even downright stupid.

After all, who could ever criticize a stellar defensive first baseman batting .291 with 20 home runs and 90 RBI?

Well, namely desperate and irrational Cubs fans, like myself, who were spoiled by Lee’s MVP-caliber 2005 performance, where he batted .335 with 46 home runs and 107 RBI. Some of us even adamantly campaigned for a trade after the drop-off in Lee’s production.

We want our lovable losers to be World Champions so very badly, that we’ll often find whatever scapegoat is most convenient.

Yet, the more I thought about the situation, the more I realized that the complaints and trade suggestions do us no good—especially when we haven’t taken the time to analyze the problem and look for constructive solutions.

In Lee’s case, the problems are there, but so are the answers—however subtle they may be. Let’s take a look.

Problems

Perhaps the biggest knock against Lee right now is his inability to hit for power.

As the main No. 3 hitter in the Cubs’ lineup last year, Lee hit only 20 home runs—15 of which were only solo shots—and had an AB/HR ratio of 31.2, which is a substantial increase from his 12.9 ratio in 2005. In fact, his AB/HR ratio has steadily increased since 2005 from 12.9 to 21.9 (2006) to 25.8 (2007) to his last year’s ratio of 31.2.

In addition, Lee’s slugging percentage of .462 last year was not only 35 points below his career average, but it also was his lowest output since 1999.

Lee, however, is still a RBI machine, as exemplified by his 6.9 AB/RBI ratio (surprisingly higher than his 5.6 ratio in 2005), but even now, it still seems like he’s not maximizing his RBI potential.

After all, if Lee simply substituted some of his doubles with homers, he would almost guarantee himself an increase in his number of RBI.

The other main concern surrounding Lee’s game is the ridiculously high number of double plays he grounded into last season. Lee finished second in the league with 27 GDPs, which was 15 more than the number he had in 2005.

Frankly, watching the athletically gifted Lee consistently ground into inning-ending double plays is almost as painful as say, seeing MJ miss a game-winning jumper. The only difference is that the former happens much more frequently than the latter, and that, in of itself, is a big problem for the Cubs.

Solutions

So how do the Cubs and Lee go about fixing this situation?

The most obvious solution is to somehow get Lee to hit more fly balls. This certainly makes sense, since the more fly balls a player hits, the better the chances that one of those fly balls will land in the stands.

Based on FanGraphs’ analysis, Lee hit nearly 45 percent of the balls he put into play on the ground, while only 33.7 percent were fly balls (distinct from line drives). Compare that to his successful 2005 season when only 38.6 percent of the balls he put into play were grounders, and 39.4 percent were fly balls.

With more grounders, Lee also increases his chances of grounding into double plays, so by lifting the ball into the air more, Lee would seemingly cut down on those killer double plays—thereby fixing both of his nagging issues.

Problem solved, right?

Unfortunately, not quite.

While hitting more fly balls and fewer ground balls might be appealing in theory, it doesn’t pan out quite so successfully in practice.

Due to his open stance and tall figure (6’5”), Lee often has a tough time getting his bat under the ball. He still possesses terrific bat speed, and will hit the ball hard, but he’s somehow developed a swing that tends to hit the top half of the baseball, thereby driving it hard into the ground.

Changing an established player’s batting mechanics is a dangerous thing to attempt, and more often than not, it fails miserably. So in that respect, waving a magic wand and expecting Lee to suddenly hit many more fly balls just isn’t realistic.

Moreover, even if Lee somehow did hit more fly balls, the chances of it becoming a home run won’t be very high. Lee’s HR-per-fly-ball ratio has steadily dropped the past four seasons, starting at 23.7 percent in 2005 and ending at a measly 11.7 percent in 2008.

This begs the question: is Lee bound to become another depressing story among the Cubs’ already overflowing potpourri of failed stories?

Some seem to think so, as they claim Lee’s 2005 season to be nothing more than an anomaly. Even if it wasn’t, many critics believe that Lee’s severe wrist injury in 2006 has rendered him only a shadow of the star he once was.

Fortunately for Cubs fans, they’re wrong.

Lee’s struggles are by no means irreversible, as long as he puts in quality time and effort into becoming a more patient hitter.

Since 2005, Lee’s percent of swings outside the strike zone has consistently increased—from 16.9 percent in 2005 to 20.8 percent in 2008. What’s more troubling is the fact that among those swings at bad pitches, Lee’s ability to put the ball into play has actually jumped tremendously.

In 2005, Lee connected on 43.6 percent of his “bad” swings, while last year, he put into play a whooping 57.4 percent of those same “bad” swings.

Why are these numbers important?

Well, not only is Lee swinging at pitches outside the zone more frequently—which puts him in pitcher-friendly counts and gives the pitcher less incentive to actually throw a strike—but he’s actually hitting those balls into play.

Based on just what I learned in little league baseball, hitting pitches near your head or at your ankles rarely results in a positive result. More often than not, the outcome of the swing will be a pop-up or an easily fielded grounder, which, if there are men on base, can then lead to a double play.

Derrek Lee is no Vladimir Guerrero, so when Lee connects at a low and away fastball (which is Lee’s “sucker” pitch), it’ll usually result in a slow dribbler and possibly develop into a double play.

Consequently, his power numbers go down, his average suffers, and his frustrating GDP tendencies naturally rise. Hitting the ball doesn’t seem to be Lee’s problem; it’s determining whether a ball should be hit that’s bothering him.

If Lee develops more patience and waits for better pitches to hit, Cubs fans can expect fewer double plays, more hard hit balls that actually land for hits, and even possibly more home runs from Lee.

Fortunately for us, the circumstances of the upcoming season seem to provide just the right atmosphere for Lee to get back on track.

With Micah Hoffpauir, who’s adept with the bat, as the backup first baseman, Lee will get more time off to rest physically and mentally—something that hitting coach Gerald Perry is really emphasizing for him—and it’ll give him the time and energy to rediscover some plate discipline.

The arrival of Milton Bradley should also take some of the offensive pressure off of Lee, and if Lou wises up and bats Bradley third, Lee will finally have the opportunity to shine in the second or sixth spot of the lineup, where his solid doubles and singles production and his surprising base-running abilities will allow him to flourish.

And with the bats of Ramirez, Soriano, and Soto also strolling the lineup, Lee will probably see more homer-friendly fastballs—fastballs that’ll go a long ways in curing the nostalgia I’m sure he has for his 2005 season.

So Cubs fans, don’t fret; a change for the better for Derrek Lee is likely to come soon.

And most importantly, don’t let that tempting irrationality take control of your life this season—that is, unless Mark Prior wins the Cy Young, Milton Bradley beats up Lou, and everyone gets back spasms from a contagious sneeze that starts with Rich Harden.

In that case, it might just be best to add the Cubs to your list of things that don’t exist.

Bob Knight is the Worst Kind of Idiot: He and Gatorade Aren't Friends

Hao Meng — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 19:29:28 -0500

When it comes to basketball coaching legend Bob Knight, Wikipedia’s got it all wrong.

They’ve made Knight’s page way too long.

It only really needs two sentences: Bob Knight is a former American college basketball head coach.

And he is an idiot.

Keep in mind, I don’t mean just any idiot; Knight is—in nearly way—the epitome of the babbling, temperamental, and egotistical idiot America has come to love to hate—and rightfully so.

This isn’t to say that Bob Knight hasn’t achieved plenty of success in the sports world. He’s been a talented coach—leading the Indiana Hoosiers to three NCAA championships, 11 Big Ten Conference championships, and one National Invitation Tournament (NIT) championship—and he’s one of only three coaches to win an NCAA title, NIT title, and an Olympic gold medal, which he did as the coach of the 1984 US Men’s Basketball Team.

Yet, we hardly know him for his basketball intellect, nor do we joyfully clamor about the squeaky-clean programs he ran at Indiana and Texas Tech.

It’s a shame, really, for Knight has no one to blame but himself—the spoiled, attention-driven man-child who nearly always speaks and acts without thinking (picture a not-so-funny, vulgar, and more talented version of Charles Barkley as a coach, and you’ll get Bob Knight).

After all, no one instructed him to chuck a chair across a basketball court to protest a call—not even the WWF.

No one forced him to compare awful refereeing to rape and claim, “I think that if rape is inevitable, relax and enjoy it”—not even Kobe Bryant.

No one persuaded him to not shake Illinois coach Lou Henson’s hand after a game in 1991—not even Bill Belichick.

No one encouraged him to whip, kick, head-butt, choke, and hit various players that played for him over the years—not even Dodgeball’s Patches O’Houlihan.

And certainly no one taught Knight to accidentally shoot friend Thomas Mikunda in the back while hunting—not even Dick Cheney.

Now, to prove that he’s as ridiculous as ever, Bob Knight has recently taken up to defending A-Rod’s use of steroids by stating that even Gatorade is a “performance-enhancing drug.”

Yes, you read that correctly. Gatorade. The stuff that’s made of water with coloring, sugar, sodium, and potassium.

Bob Knight, should we banish bananas too, since they contain potassium? Or does it have to also have food coloring to be considered illegal?

I don’t know if Knight truly believes in the nonsense spewing from his mouth, or if he simply does it for the attention. What I do know is that it’s time for Knight to disappear from the public eye if he insists on behaving the same way.

For a legendary coach, like Bob Knight, to so nonchalantly turn his position of reverence and impact into a laughingstock on blogs and Youtube is nothing short of a travesty.

I’m not saying that Knight isn’t capable of doing nice things or positively impacting his players. In fact, most of Knight’s players have remained loyal and supportive of Knight despite his shenanigans.

What I am saying, is that Knight could do so much more with the influential power he’s earned as a talented player and coach. The positive influence Knight could have on not only the players and coaches he interacts with, but on young kids aspiring to one day become basketball players and coaches is far greater than the negative persona he currently emits.

And if he’s not willing to utilize that potential, then he needs to shut up or leave the sport of basketball.

Think about it.

Why complain about referees when you can calmly coach your team to victory and teach your players about success in the face of adversity?

Why speak in profanity-laden tirades when you can offer knowledgeable and sophisticated advice about the game of basketball?

And why irrationally debase a healthy teen-friendly drink when you can use your influence to vehemently discourage steroid use?

These are all questions that make sense to most of us.

Just not to idiots, and not to Bob Knight.

This article originally appeared in the Harvard Independent.

The Game of Love: The Best and Most Entertaining Sports Relationships

Hao Meng — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 14:41:16 -0500

If life were really perfect, Yale would cease to exist, steroid users would have their foreheads imprinted with shiny asterisks, and I would be able to take my lovely girlfriend—without social ridicule—to a romantic Cubs game instead of a showing of He's Just Not That Into You for Valentine’s Day (actually having a girlfriend would be nice as well).

Unfortunately, life hasn’t given most of us fresh lemons; so when we try to immerse the very best of gooey, mushy, and syrupy (yum?) romance into the world of sports, we’re often met with not only a disapproving response, but also a warning-filled picture of Dennis Rodman marrying himself in a wedding dress.

Lesson learned? Not quite.

Truth be told, genuine romance flourishes in sports just as naturally as girls lose their inhibitions at the sight of John Mayer. With so much attention devoted to robotically analyzing mock drafts and contract negations, we tend to forget the simple fact that famous athletes, too, are capable of falling in love.

When they do, more often than not, it’s a pleasant sight, and one certainly welcome amidst all the sports cynicism surrounding A-Rod, a drunken Sir Charles, and "incompetent" Super Bowl referees.

So with the upcoming Valentine’s Day in mind, here’s a look at some of the most beautiful, entertaining, and genuine sports relationships still in existence today.

"I'm Hot, You're Hot, Let's Make Some Hot Babies"

David Beckham and Posh Spice

Since 1997, this power duo has been a guilty pleasure for girls and guys alike. Whether it’s because of Beckham’s exotic tattoos (read: the godly body they’re located on) or the former Spice Girl’s sultry legs, we consistently find ourselves irrationally enthralled by the couple.

Yet, despite the intense media attention, their marriage has lasted for nearly 10 years and continues to remain strong.

In fact, the hopelessly romantic Beckham surprised his wife with a second wedding just last year. They ended up both crying, and Posh later claimed that it was the second best day of her life—after the first wedding. I don’t know about you, but true love in my book doesn’t get much better than David Beckham actually believing he has to impress his wife.

Tony Parker and Eva Longoria

If you’re tall, dark, and handsome, it’s likely that you’ll have a shot at an attractive spouse. But if you’re also gifted with a charming French accent and ridiculously good basketball skills, you might as well get used to sleeping in the same bed as No. 1 of Maxim’s 2006 Hottest Female Stars List.

Such is reality for the nimble Spurs point guard, Tony Parker, and his sultry wife, Desperate Housewives’ Eva Longoria.

Luckily, they don’t let their combined beauty detract from their loving marriage. Parker says Longoria is the "best thing in [his] life," while Longoria claims that Tony has been "nothing short of the perfect husband."

Take from that what you may, but if you want to be immature and have some fun, make sure to put the phrase "in bed" at the end of the couple’s endearing proclamations of love. After all, what’s unsaid can often be true.

Tom Brady and Every Sexy Model in the World

Enough said.

"That's Cool! You Play Sports, Too?"

Nomar Garciaparra and Mia Hamm

Remember Nomar and his idiosyncratic routine where he taps his feet like a dancer before every swing? Well, it was apparently attractive enough to impress soccer darling Mia Hamm.

Married since 2003, the couple remains very much a united team; in talking about their twin daughters, Mia reveals, "They sleep in different rooms right now, so I have the monitor for one and [Nomar] has the one for the other. When my monitor goes off, I go. When his goes off, he goes."

Now, if Nomar could only apply that sense of successful teamwork to his baseball skills...

Yao Ming and Ye Li

I never understood those girls around 5'2" who fantasized about one day marrying the 7'6" Yao. One, he’s not exactly your stereotypical handsome prince, and two, any PDA would most likely involve a short arm wrapped around Yao’s thigh. Fortunately for Yao and the rest of us, he’s now happily married to Ye Li, a 6'3" Chinese basketball player.

Their love story is definitely beyond cute. Hampered with practices and competitions, the two rarely got to see another.

To make up for it, Yao often snuck Ye out to midnight movies, while simultaneously finding every opportunity to give Ye cartloads (literally) full of stuffed toys. Who knew that the "Great Wall of China" was such a softy? Maybe Shaq secretly watches Hallmark movies too.

Matt Treanor and Misty May-Treanor

I can tell you three things about this lovely marriage.

1) Matt and Misty have been successfully working around Matt’s baseball schedule and Misty’s beach volleyball schedule since 2004.

2) Misty and Matt each have the expression "M^2" tattooed on their arms to express the loving connection they share with one another.

3) Matt can’t possibly be a George W. Bush fan, especially after Bush’s hand became friends with Misty’s buns of steel during the Olympic Games.

"Lessons Learned"

Kobe Bryant and Vanessa Bryant

There’s no denying that Kobe has treated us to some of the most brilliant basketball performances in recent history. Yet, he never gets enough credit for teaching married men an important fact: The current going price for sleeping with a complete stranger is a $4 million diamond ring.

Kobe, thank you tremendously for your continued wisdom. You are so far beyond your years.

Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson

What’s the lesson learned here? Kind-hearted guys like Romo who give homeless people movie tickets and fix tires for old people stuck on the side of the road are still susceptible to falling for dim-witted blonde bombshells.

Hopefully, Romo will change Simpson for the better and eventually persuade her to stop doing things she’s terrible at—like singing.

Anna Kournikova and Enrique Iglesias

Oh wait, I forgot, this is an article about relationships involving athletes. My mistake. Just watch Iglesias’s music video, Escape, to get an idea of their relationship.

"Good People Still Make Good Marriages"

Kurt and Brenda Warner

As if Kurt Warner didn’t do enough things right in life, he’s also quite the compassionate husband.

In an interview with Gordon Robertson, Brenda Warner offers the following thoughts about her loving husband—thoughts that I think effectively reflect the couple’s genuine love for one another:

"The first night we met, after we danced that night, I told him, 'I just want you to know I am a divorced mother of two, so if I never hear from you again, I will understand.' That's the way it usually worked. The next morning, he showed up with a rose and wanted to meet the kids."

"He fell in love with the kids a lot sooner than he fell in love with me. He looked at us as three blessings instead of just one. I just kept waiting for the man that I deserved, and God blessed me with him."

So on this Valentine’s Day, don’t be afraid to implement a bit of sport flair into whatever you’re planning for that special girl.

Take her to a ballgame, shoot some hoops with her, or if you have a body like David Beckham, simply take off your shirt and kick a soccer ball back and forth.

Just remember, as long as you don’t pull a Kobe, Valentine’s Day is yours to enjoy. And who knows, if you’re daring/stupid enough to ask her to marry you on the Jumbotron, she just might say "yes."

This article was originally published on The Harvard Independent.

A Look At The Cubs' 2009 Lineup: Please Tell Me You Can Hit a Curve in October

Hao Meng — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 15:19:05 -0500

I’ve only been a Cubs fan for 13 years, but I’ve already learned an important lesson many older Cubs fans still refuse to accept today: Correctly predicting when the Cubs will win a World Series is about as likely as correctly predicting when we’ll run out of oil.

It’s bound to happen (knock on wood), but nobody knows when.

I don’t plan on reverting back to my naïve ways, so I won’t make any bold proclamations of postseason success for the Lovable Losers (somebody tell Big-Z and Dempster, please?).

That being said, I do believe that the Cubs' 2009 lineup looks promising—especially if Lou is willing to make some changes from the playoff lineup that made Padres’ hitters look like All-Stars.

If so, the lineup could look like this:

1. Ryan Theriot, SS

Does Shaq play point guard? Is Peyton Manning a wide receiver? Is David Beckham a goalie? No, no, and no. So why does Lou insist on batting Soriano leadoff?

Look, a leadoff hitter has to get on base, steal bases, and generally be a pesky obstacle for the pitcher; no Cubs does that better than The Riot.

In 2008, he had a .387 on base percentage (.419 when batting leadoff), stole 22 bases, and had 15 more walks than strikeouts—numbers that overshadow both Soriano and the newly acquired Aaron Miles.

2. Mike Fontenot, 2B

Fontenot should earn a right to a starting spot this year after batting .305 with an OBP of .395 and a slugging percentage of .534 in 2008. He’s a lefty with deceptive pop in his bat (of 74 hits last year, 32 were extra-base hits) that pitchers often underestimate.

Plus, with a proven hitter batting behind him, Fontenot should see more fastballs that he can crush for doubles and homers.

3. Milton Bradley, RF

The Cubs paid Bradley big money to get on base and drive home runs. There is no better position in the lineup to do that than batting third.

With a Cubs offense that’s more explosive than the Rangers offense, expect Bradley to reach 100+ RBIs while maintaining a .400+ OBP. His switch-hitting abilities should give him more versatility at the plate than Derrek Lee.

4. Aramis Ramirez, 3B

I don’t understand Cubs fans who clamored for a Ramirez trade after last season. Who ever heard of wanting to trade a cleanup hitter that hit 27 home runs, led the team with 111 RBIs, and had fewer than 100 strikeouts? He’ll provide nice protection for Bradley, while continuing to be the hitting machine he is.

5. Alfonso Soriano, LF

Stick him here, and then go flip a coin. Heads, he strikes out. Tails, he hits a three-run home run. Not bad odds. It’s certainly better than having him bat leadoff and expecting either a strikeout or a solo home run.

6. Derrek Lee, 1B

Ever since his wrist injury, Lee hasn’t been the same hitter he was during his monster 2005 season. His average, OBP, and power numbers are all down, and he’s much more likely to experience the occasional strikeout.

If he can cut down on his strikeouts, Lou can move him to the second slot, which would allow Soto to bat sixth, and Fontenot to bat seventh—giving the end of the lineup much more power.

7. Geovany Soto, C

Soto had a breakout year last season, hitting 23 home runs, driving in 86 runs, and winning Rookie of the Year Honors. With another year under his belt, he should be much more mature both at the plate and behind it (where he already did a phenomenal job).

I still think he’ll have somewhat of a sophomore slump, but if Lou gives him the rest he needs during the regular season, he should have enough in him to shine in the playoffs.

8. Reed Johnson/ Kosuke Fukudome, CF

You can’t help but love Reed Johnson and his drive to perform in every game. Even without a starting role, he fought in every at bat, and did his part by hitting .333 in 147 at bats against lefties.

Plus, that catch he made against the Nationals last year was sick in every sense of the word. He’ll give the Cubs solid production in the eighth spot. As for Kosuke, let’s just hope he realizes that spinning like a ballerina is not the optimal way to swing a baseball bat.

By and large, this will be a formidable lineup that should put up its fair share of runs.

Then again, it’s always hard to know how the Cubs will do. They always find a way to surprise you—and not in the good way.

I guess I’ll just go pray that this lineup will help the Cubs win a World Series before we run out of oil.

Don't Let the Good Times End: The Arizona Cardinals' Offseason Priorities

Hao Meng — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:52:14 -0500

It's true what they say: all good things eventually come to an end.

But for the Arizona Cardinals, that end cannot—and should not—be now.

Not after 61 years of what can only be described as a terribly depressing romantic attachment with the cellars of the NFC East and West; you know, the kind of attachment that makes "Bennifer" in Gigli appear rational and heartwarming.

Never has there been an offseason as important for the Cardinals as this one, and if Bill Bidwill and Rod Graves want another shot at the Super Bowl, they need to take care of five crucial tasks.

1. Convince Kurt Warner to Sign an Extension

We can talk about Larry Fitzgerald's brilliance, Anquan Boldin's toughness, and Steve Breaston's speed all day long, but without Warner fearlessly slinging the football around, the Cardinals' offense just isn't the same.

Much like playing a rock song without the passionate, yet steady drummer, the Cardinal's offense without an experienced and talented quarterback like Warner tends to lose its explosiveness.

The Cardinals' much-heralded passing game relies heavily on precision, timing, and anticipation--three successful staples of Warner's repertoire that Matt Leinart has yet to perfect.

A two-year, $18 million contract is more than reasonable if Warner continues to produce at such a high level—especially with the overrated Eli Manning likely set to make around $15 million/year.

With Warner looking great physically and the continued development of his receivers, the Cardinals' offense should continue to excel.

Now, if the Cardinals could just pry Brenda Warner off his husband long enough for Kurt to sign...

2. Place the Franchise Tag on Karlos Dansby if a Long-Term Contract is Not Possible

Dansby was a key player on a young Cardinals' defense that, by and large, continued to improve throughout the season.

During the regular season, the middle linebacker had a whooping 119 tackles, two interceptions, and two interceptions—statistics that will undoubtedly draw the attention of teams scouring the market for young linebackers in their prime.

As the franchise player last year, Dansby is reportedly looking for a contract similar to the one former Cardinals' linebacker, Calvin Pace, signed last year with the Jets—a six-year $42 million deal with $20 million guaranteed.

While Dansby is a fine player, he has yet to reach Ray Lewis status, and if the Cardinals can't reach a more affordable deal, it would be in their best interest to put the franchise tag (around $10 million) on him again this year. The tag will allow the Cardinals to retain the centerpiece of their improving defense, while providing Dansby an incentive to produce next season in hopes of cashing in on a future long-term deal.

3. Don't Waste a First-Round Pick on a Running Back

If the 2008 draft taught us anything, it's that talented running backs are still available after the first round. Matt Forte (1,238 yards, 8 TDs) was drafted in the second round, Steve Slaton (1,282 yards, 4.8 avg, 9 TDs) was drafted in the third round, and the Cardinal's own back, Tim Hightower (10 TDs) was drafted in the fifth round.

With the likelihood of Edgerrin James leaving and J.J. Arrington becoming a free agent, the Cardinals do need to draft a running back to complement Hightower--but definitely not with a first-round pick.

The Cardinals can most likely pick up a tough inside runner with a low center of gravity like Javon Ringer (MSU) or Ronald Brown (Connecticut) in the second round. Ringer's been compared to Chester Taylor while Brown's strength and speed allowed him to be the nation's leading rusher this past season.

I strongly believe that either choice will boost Arizona's running game--giving them a one-two punch with Hightower that will really help out the passing game.

Perhaps the most intriguing possibility would be Devin Moore of Wyoming. Despite lacking the strength and size, Moore runs a sub 4.4 and has a nice cutting ability that can give linebackers plenty of headaches. He'll likely be a late rounder pick, but he might surprise everyone and morph into Darren Sproles version 2.0.

4. Go with the Unsexy First-Round Pick

Instead, the Cardinals should use that pick to draft either a physical cornerback who can tackle or an offensive lineman who can really excel in the running game.

A cornerback like DJ Moore or Alphonso Smith—both of who tough, quick, and athletic—would nicely complement DRC. Moore is an excellent return man, and can take over nicely for J.J. Arrington if he leaves for free agency, while Smith's toughness and attitude has been likened him to a Pacman Jones without the unnecessary baggage.

The Cardinals could also go with a talented center, like Alex Mack (California), if he is available near the end of the first round. With so many talented offensive tackles in the draft, Mack might coast under the radar until the Cardinals' 31st pick.

If so, the Cardinals would be reasonable in taking Mack, whom many consider to be one of the best centers to enter the draft since Nick Mangold.

5. Restructure Anquan Boldin's Contract

In an act that revealed the respect Boldin's teammates have for him, Fitzgerald said that he would restructure his own contract to give management more money for a new contract for Boldin.

Forget the whole outburst with Todd Haley; Boldin simply let his emotions get the best of him for one of the few times in his career.

When it boils down to it, Boldin is simply a tough, consistent competitor who has always been known for his dedication to the team. He's a wide receiver that fears no one (much like Hines Ward) and runs like a running back.

His type is an extremely rare breed in the NFL--especially among the whining, selfish wide receivers in the game--and the Cardinals would be wise to hang onto him.

Kurt Warner Should Apply to Harvard Law: Why Warner Is Hall-of-Fame Bound

Hao Meng — Sat, 31 Jan 2009 18:02:13 -0500

By now, Kurt Warner’s heartfelt rags-to-riches story has become slightly trite, and with the Arizona Cardinal’s rapid rise to fame, Warner’s story has instead been replaced by a heated debate on his Hall of Fame potential.

Frankly, it’s a shame we need to spend time arguing the issue, for Warner deserves to be enshrined as much as Joe Buck deserves a job that doesn’t require talking. Unfortunately, the debate rages on, as a sizable group of people who believe Warner and Hall of Fame are mutually exclusive still exists.

Call me crazy, but I have a tongue-in-cheek feeling these critics had applications that didn’t get them into the college they wanted. After all, if we likened Warner’s Hall of Fame candidacy to a Harvard Law School application, I sincerely doubt Warner would have any problems being accepted.

And perhaps—just perhaps—a somewhat silly comparison of this sort will convince some of Warner’s critics to see the light.

Statistically, Warner’s numbers read like a transcript on academic steroids. Much like an outstanding 3.9 GPA, Warner’s 93.8 career passer rating stands fourth overall, behind only Steve Young, Peyton Manning, and Tony Romo.

His accuracy is god-like, as Warner’s 65.4 percent career completion percentage ranks 2nd overall, and he certainly knows how to rack up yards in a game—averaging an NFL record of 259.9 career passing yards per game, a number unsurpassed by even the great Dan Marino.

Warner’s critics, however, often point to the fact that Warner plays in a pass-happy era of professional football, and as a result, his passing numbers are an inaccurate depiction of his actual skill in comparison to great QBs of older decades.

Yet, in career yards per attempt (8.0) and career net yards per pass attempt (7.14)—two statistics that many consider valid when comparing QBs of different eras—Warner ranks third and fifth respectively.

In other words, if you can’t trust Warner’s GPA because you think his school encouraged grade inflation, you can certainly trust his standardized LSAT scores, an immutable test every law school applicant must take.

When that critique doesn’t pan out, naysayers tend to attack Warner’s limited playing time, arguing that no NFL player deserves Hall of Fame recognition after only three or four outstanding seasons and only 110 regular season games.

They also tend to conveniently ignore modern-era Hall of Fame QB Bob Waterfield, who played only 91 games, and Hall of Fame QBs Troy Aikman, Roger Staubach, Joe Namath, and Norm Van Brocklin—all of whom have played more games than Warner but thrown fewer touchdown passes than Warner.

After all, doesn’t it seem unfair to favor a student who gets straight B’s while attending every class over a student who receives straight A’s despite missing a couple of classes?

Perhaps most impressively, despite not playing many games (going to many classes), Warner performs brilliantly when he actually does play. Warner has thrown for more than 300 yards in 44 percent of his games (including games where he didn’t start). The next closest quarterback is Dan Fouts with a 28 percent, while Manning and Marino stand at a measly 26 percent.

Now desperate to defend their point, Warner’s critics often finally succumb to criticizing his tendency to throw ill-advised interceptions.

In reality, however, Warner’s career percentage of interceptions (3.2 percent) actually ranks better than 22 other Hall of Famers, including Warren Moon, Jim Kelly, Bart Starr, Johnny Unitas, and Terry Bradshaw.

Moreover, his touchdown passes vs. interception differential is higher than the likes of Terry Bradshaw, Warren Moon, and Troy Aikman. Seemingly, Warner learns and improves plenty for every mistake that he makes—a trait that should hardly harm his candidacy.

On top of his tremendous regular season statistics, Warner is an absolute genius in the playoffs, and when the games and tests start to truly matter, he nearly always brings his A+ game.

Among all quarterbacks who have started 10 or more playoff games, Warner’s 80 percent winning percentage (8-2) is only behind Bart Starr and Tom Brady and ahead of Bradshaw, Aikman, John Elway, and even the great Joe Montana. Even in the two losing games he started, Warner threw for a combined 730 yards, and in Super Bowl XXXVI, Warner rallied the Rams from 14 points down before “Automatic Adam” kicked the winning field goal.

In addition, Warner holds the second-highest postseason QB rating in NFL history (97.3) and the record for most passing yards in a Super Bowl (414). In some ways, “(K)Clutch Kurt” might actually be an appropriate nickname for Mr. Warner—especially after Warner orchestrated the Cardinal’s winning 14-play 72-yards drive in the NFC Championship Game.

With such outstanding statistical credentials, Warner’s resume is bound to have a respectable awards section. He is a two-time NFL MVP (and arguably should have won for the third time this season), has four Pro Bowl selections, and three Super Bowl appearances—which is more than Manning, Marino, and Brett Favre.

More impressively, Warner is just the second quarterback to lead two different teams to a Super Bowl.

Of course, many applicants to both Harvard Law School and the NFL Hall of Fame have impressive statistics; what, then, distinguishes the deserving from the not so deserving? Toughness, leadership, and character.

When all is said and done, Warner is a star beyond any numbers. He’s a fearless warrior willing to get pummeled by a heavier linebacker in order to give his receivers the precious seconds needed to get open. He’s a gritty fighter who carried two laughable franchises to stardom, even after suffering rejections, injuries, and demotions. And he’s a decent human being who always puts the team and sportsmanship before individual merit and egotistical showmanship

On the football field, Warner is nothing short of class act; he led a group of players from both teams in prayer when teammate Anquan Boldin was injured on a vicious helmet-to-helmet tackle during a regular season game against the Jets.

While off the field, he’s the prime example that virtue can still triumph in the evermore egomaniacal NFL dominated by the likes of Terrell Owens, Jay Cutler, and Chad Johnson.

Every night before a football game, Warner and his family eat at their favorite local restaurant. During the meal, Warner has his kids quietly target another family eating, before he proceeds to tell the wait staff that he would like to anonymously add the dinner tab of that family of strangers to his own.

Why does he do it? Because it’s a “way of instilling in his children the joy of giving” and reminding them that “our circumstances are not the most important thing. It’s what we do with those circumstances that matter.”

Without a doubt, Warner has taken the tough circumstances presented in his own life and molded quite a defining career. Not only is Warner’s career successful and statistically impressive, it offers a story unprecedented in its inspiration.

Rarely do we find professional quarterbacks that shine so brightly both on the field and off; just look at Warner’s backup Matt Leinart who has failed to do so on both accounts. When we do find that shining gem, however, it would be nothing short of a mistake to fail to celebrate and enshrine its existence and achievement.

Kurt Warner represents that gem, and regardless of whether the Cardinals win Super Bowl 43, Warner should be a celebrated member of the NFL Hall of Fame, and perhaps some day—in a different time—a member of Harvard Law School.