Bleacher Report - Articles by hocus pocus

What About All the People Who Signed Up To Fire Andy Reid?

hocus pocus — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 02:55:31 -0500

It was back in October—Oct. 7, to be precise. I wrote a petition for the world to sign. The purpose of the petition was to get Philadelphia Eagles Owner Jeffrey Lurie to fire his Head Coach and Executive VP of Football Operations, Andy Reid.

Well, exactly three months have passed and the Philadelphia Eagles and their Head Coach have slithered their way to the Divisional Round of the NFL Playoffs against the New York Football Giants.

WHOOPTY-DOO you might assume, well actually no, I AM ECSTATIC!

And I would hope the 2,000 plus people who signed the petition are ecstatic, too.

Why the change in tone towards my beloved Philadelphia Eagles? Two words: Philadelphia Phillies.

If the Philadelphia Phillies can break "The Curse Of William Penn," why should I not believe the Eagles can follow suit?

Devise a way to maneuver themselves through the door the Phillies have swung wide open, or better yet, find a back door to the Professional Sports Championship Room and go in that way.

I'm sure the Phillies will be waiting there, nonetheless, arms wide open, welcoming their brethren to The Promised Land.

Do I think it will happen? Maybe. Why not?

I've seen enough balls not bounce in favor of my Philadelphia Eagles and other Philadelphia Sports Teams. Maybe this year year is different. Maybe the Sports Gods are smiling upon us now. At least the Phillies have proven they were being smiled upon.

But, what would I place my money on if I were a betting man?

That the Eagles will go into the Meadowlands to face the Giants like fearless, possessed, football superheroes and dismantle the Giants in the same manner they did the Dallas Cowboys, 44-6, in Week 17.

And then the following week, in the NFC Championship Game, walk into Bank of America Stadium to play the Carolina Panthers, with the weight, courage and hope of the Philadelphia populace upon their shoulders.

And proceed to let us all down in identical fashion to their performance in 2003, the NFC Championship Game against Tampa Bay, the Veterans Stadium finale.

I honestly believe Andy Reid has changed.

He must have in order to get the Eagles this far. Out of the doldrums of October, November, and Week 16 in December.

But he hasn't changed that much.

So keep this address handy.

You might need it shortly.

Thanks for reading, Kevin Riley.

Dear Donovan McNabb, I Don't Care What You Have To Say Anymore

hocus pocus — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 17:03:55 -0500

Dear Donovan McNabb,

I don't care what you have to say anymore, so please stop posting on your blog. Last week, you said blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah. And blah, blah, blah. Then you said, "These are just words. I need to put them into action."

Well, thank you for the action you put into the game versus Cincinnati. Two words Donovan, Spek Tacular! You really showed us! So, as far as you are concerned Donovan, please SHUT THE * * * * UP, OKAY?

And as far as your blog is concerned, please stop it. We can keep last weeks blog on file forever and in it we will be able to find you saying the only thing any of us want to hear you say, "These are just words. I need to put them into action."

So I don't want to hear any more words from you Donovan, you have better things to do with your time as the quarterback of MY PHILADELPHIA EAGLES.

You can practice throwing the football chest high at moving targets, you can practice throwing the football ankle high at standing targets (but you already do that), or you can get a part-time job somewhere in a high-pressure high-stress environment to build your stamina.

You can read the National Football League rulebook to wither away all the things you do not know about the game you play under a $115 MILLION CONTRACT, you can watch other National Football League quarterbacks play so you can get an idea of how to win when it matters, or you can just sit somewhere and SHUT THE * * * * UP!

Just please don't ridicule me and other Philadelphia Eagles fans Donovan. Please don't write any more useless words on your blog. Please don't speak publicly about things that don't mean anything. You are a professional football player Donovan, you are a professional football player for the team that I love.

That being said, your worth to me lives and dies with YOU WINNING GAMES. And if you can't do that, then you are dead to me. SO STOP WITH ALL THE BLOGGING; I DON'T CARE WHAT DEAD PEOPLE THINK.

To end on a positive note, Donovan, I know it is not all your fault (less than 20 percent of it is by my estimation) so can I please have your support to fire Andy Reid? A petition for his removal is available here.

Thanks Donovan ;)

Fire Andy Reid

hocus pocus — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 23:31:17 -0400

Hi everbody, I don't like Andy Reid. I made a petition to fire him. I have 99 signatures so far. I think I need more. Please sign it.