Bleacher Report - Articles by Shari Toomey

Myron Cope, 1929-2008: The Passing Of An Icon

Shari Toomey — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 07:24:18 -0500

Today, Pittsburgh Steelers fans mourn the loss of their beloved announcer, Myron Cope.

Myron Cope began doing radio broadcasts for the Steelers in 1970, and his voice, crazy phrases, and "Pittsburghese" accent made him famous in Pittsburgh. Fans of the Pittsburgh Steelers had to be almost bilingual at times to understand Cope, especially when he got off on a rant.

Sounds and words like "Yoi", "Double yoi!", "Okel dokel", and "MM-hah" filled the Steelers broadcasts—as well as the traditional "Pittsburghese" words like, "warsh", "dahn tahn", and "yinz."

But whether you understood him or not, you had to love Myron Cope.

It was a playoff game in 1975, however, that made him a Steelers icon. Myron urged fans to bring yellow dish towels to Three Rivers Stadium to wave during the game, hoping the color and motion would excite the crowd. The idea caught on, and the Terrible Towel was born.

Myron Cope's son Daniel was born with severe autism, and Myron was tireless in his charitable efforts for causes addressing autism in Pittsburgh. Most people don't know that Myron donated proceeds from Terrible Towel sales to the Allegheny Valley School, which specializes in the care of children with autism. In 1996, Myron gave the school total trademark and ownership rights to the Terrible Towel.

Although Myron Cope officially retired in 2005, he was surely not forgotten. He was honored with the Pete Rozelle award for longtime exceptional contributions to football in radio and television in 2005. He is the only NFL announcer to be inducted into the National Radio Hall of Fame, and he is also enshrined in Canton.

The city of Pittsburgh seems a little colder today, and the sun isn't shining quite as brightly over Heinz Field. Today, a giant hole has opened up in the middle of the Steelers Nation. A beloved journalist, announcer, and the Steelers' biggest fan has passed away. Steeler faithful may be comforted by the thought of Cope and the Chief in heaven having a cigar together while they talk about the Steelers, but he will be sorely missed.

Steelers fans: gather together and share your favorite Copisms tonight. Put on your Steelers jersey, t-shirt, or hat. Hang your Terrible Towels at half mast in tribute to a Pittsburgh legend, and raise your glass of Iron City:

"To Myron—Double Yoi!!!"

The N-O-Line in Pittsburgh: How the Steelers Can Fix the Holes

Shari Toomey — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 04:32:03 -0500

Big Ben spent the 2007 season running for his life behind a line plagued by poor performance and offseason discord.

Last May in a heated statement, Alan Faneca made it clear that this past year would be his last as a Pittsburgh Steeler. He also questioned how much of his heart he could put into the season.

Add to that the retirement of Pro Bowl center Jeff Hartings, and things up front were not looking very good. Just ask Ben, who was sacked 53 times during 16 starts. It's hard to complete passes on your back.

So as a result of last season's poor performance and free agency, this offseason the Steelers will need to thoroughly revamp their offensive line.

Sean Mahan's performance at center last season was abysmal, and the Steelers need to make protection of Pro Bowl quarterback Roethlisberger priority one. Obviously, the Steelers will need to address the position of center first, but probably not through the draft—their significant deficiencies elsewhere make that an improbable scenario.

More likely, Willie Colon will try out at center if the Steelers draft a tackle. It’s also possible that Kendall Simmons might try the move to center.

Rather than go fishing for free agents, the Steelers have always preferred to develop their own talent. They look to the draft to fill most gaps on their roster, so don't expect much help from the free agency pool.

Unfortunately, this year's draft is not brimming with talented offensive linemen, but there are a few who could become solid performers.

A good first round possibility for the Steelers is tackle Jeff Otah from Pitt. He is a good run blocker, and that fits the Steelers style. He is also quick, strong, and aggressive.

However, there is a good chance that he will go earlier than the 23rd pick. If he's still around, look for the Steelers to grab him.

Chris Williams out of Vanderbilt could be considered if Otah goes to another team. He is nimble, mobile, and great at pass protection. However, he doesn't get great push and needs more strength, so Pittsburgh may pass on him.

Despite having a Pro Bowl quarterback, the Steelers are still a grind-it-out team and they need someone who can open up the run.

Gosder Cherilus, a tackle from Boston College, is another prospect. He is a good run blocker with a lot of strength. His greatest weakness is against quick edge rushers, but this deficiency will probably be easier to overlook than Williams' lack of push. I would put him at No. 2 on the Steelers’ wish list, right behind Otah.

The Steelers have some definite prospects for their first round pick. Most likely the Philadelphia Eagles will help narrow down the possibilities.

If the Eagles take Otah, the Steelers will probably make Cherilus their first pick. But, if the Eagles select Chris Williams, look for Jeff Otah to continue his career in the Steel City.

No matter who the Steelers select first, the player will be expected to make an immediate contribution on the line. With both a Pro Bowl quarterback and running back looking for protection, the Steelers need a strengthened offensive line to maximize their potential and bolster their chances for success in 2008.

Kyle Kendrick: Worth His Weight In Hot Dogs?

Shari Toomey — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 04:37:56 -0500

Kyle Kendrick of the Philadelphia Phillies was summoned into manager Charlie Manuel's office and told he'd been traded to the Yomiuri Giants of the Japanese Central League Saturday after workouts.

Kendrick was reportedly to receive one and a half million dollars in the deal that brought Kobayashi Iwamura here to America.

Releasing trade details to the media, Ruben Amaro, Jr. told reporters that although Kendrick had had a good season, he felt that Iwamura would take the team in the right direction. Kendrick was understandably stunned. After the press release, Kendrick asked the media if there was good food in Japan. Speaking of food...

Teammate Brett Meyers took that opportunity to reveal to Kendrick that he'd been "PUNKED." Apparently, the Phillies were not looking to replace Kendrick with a Japanese hot dog eating champion.

The team, management, and media were all in on the scam led by Brett Meyers. Kendrick was visibly relieved after learning of the dupe, but he'll probably avoid hot dogs and Japanese steak houses for some time to come. Video of the "trade" can be viewed on Youtube.

Kudos to Brett Meyers and The Philadelphia Phillies on an awesome prank. With Congressional hearings tarnishing the sport of baseball, it's great to see an entire team come together for a laugh—we all needed that.

Life After the NFL: Cures for the Offseason Blues

Shari Toomey — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 04:46:05 -0500

Offseason Affective Disorder (or O-Sad) is a very real emotional condition yet to be recognized by any respectable medical or mental health professionals.

It often affects hard core football fans, but similar symptoms have been reported among enthusiasts of other sports. Most commonly beginning after the Super Bowl, O-Sad has been known to set in as early as the end of the regular NFL season.

Symptoms vary from mild to severe and include restlessness, anxiety, boredom, irritability, excessive napping in the middle of the afternoon, social withdrawal, and the inability to carry on extended conversations. Many who suffer from this disorder also report feelings of emptiness and loss.

For some reason, this winter, cases of O-Sad appended with complaints of emptiness are said to be highest among people living in the New England states.

With help, sufferers of O-Sad are able to lead normal, productive lives. As with any mental disorder, it is imperative to seek some form of treatment if you think you may be suffering from O-Sad. As a means of self-diagnosis, ask yourself the following questions:

Am I lost and bored on the weekends (especially Sundays)?

Do I channel surf for hours with nothing catching my attention?

Is my family tired of watching the same NFL Network's Game of the Week?

Are my friends tired of hearing my offseason recap?

Do I fill my free hours by researching top college prospects for the draft?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be suffering from O-Sad. But fear not, there are ways to cope with this condition:

Find a new sport to watch: Hockey is heading to the playoffs, and it is a fast-paced, exciting sport. College hoops may also be an excellent diversion and March Madness is a good way to forget about the old pigskin for awhile.
Tackle some home improvement projects: Let's face it, the gutters won't clean themselves. If that to-do list is longer than an NFL playoff roster, it's time to tackle something other than your buddies. Grab that paint brush and fight the urge to paint your team's insignia on your siding.
Go out: That's right, there is a world away from the remote. Take the family to a museum (could be a SPORTS museum...) or a movie. Earn brownie points now; training camp will be here before you know it.
Volunteer: Join your local youth football organization. These little kids are our future NFL stars; make sure they are getting the proper training. And remember, there is NO crying in football—that little seven-year-old needs to man-up.
Spend gametime in the bedroom: Four quarters, timeouts, beer, and a halftime show. Could be more exciting than that 10-7 overtime loss this season. Be creative, but remember—melted nacho cheese is hot and some balls are not to be spiked.

Please keep in mind that there is no shame in suffering from O-Sad; support groups are forming all over the country.

Someday, there will be additional football worth watching. Until then, try the above suggestions and thank God for the NFL Network and Court TV.

Giants True Shot at Glory

Shari Toomey — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 13:45:11 -0500

Super Bowl fever is spreading like a California wildfire, and even people who don't follow football feel confident enough this year to make a prediction—Patriots by a landslide.

"Not so fast," I say. I think the Giants have a shot at this thing.

Mind you, I also thought the Chargers would upset the Patriots and the Packers would annihilate the Giants. Uh, not such good picks. Does not instill very much confidence in my ability to prognosticate, does it? Truth be told, I have been terrible at picking games all season. But, I really feel good about picking the Giants...I think.

Don't bet the ranch on my advice, but I have placed a nice little bet on the Giants. They are such underdogs, if they pull out a win I can brag for months. And I will. Believe it.

However, I am not simply picking them in blind and fervent hope of an upset. There is statistical evidence that proves there is a reason for Strahan and Co. to buckle their chinstraps on Sunday. (I sure hope they are one of the better teams in the league—having made it to the Superbowl and all.) It's not like the Patriots are playing the Lions...

Anyway, the Giants performed well against the Patriots earlier in the season, and as long as Eli Manning holds it together they can do so again.

Eli is a huge key to the game. His playoff performance thus far has been solid and that's what the Giants need from him again this Sunday. New England's pass defense is ranked No. 6, so don't expect Eli to pass for 300 yards (not that he would have anyway). When he does pass, he needs to make sure it goes to his receivers. By minimizing mistakes and playing efficiently Eli can let the No. 4 rushing offense set the tempo.

The Giants will need to get more than their season average 134 yards from Brandon Jacobs and crew in order to control the clock. If they can rack up the miles, Eli doesn't have to be spectacular.

It's a formula that worked for Pittsburgh in Super Bowl XL. Ben Roethlisberger, another green quarterback, did not play extraordinarily well. However, he didn't make any huge mistakes, allowing the Steelers' running game and defense to seal the deal.

Speaking of defense: The Giants' defense is ranked No. 7 overall while the Patriots' is No. 4. Although Tom Brady has been a freak this year (the Patriots' offense is No. 1 as a result), the Giants' defense is not going to collectively step aside and let him blow up the field. They're No. 11 against the pass and I am sure they've watched some film this week. They might not know how to shut Brady down, but my good money says they just might be able to neutralize him enough to win.

So I look forward to kickoff. I think there is an actual game to be played and, win or lose, I think the Giants deserve a little more respect from the world of football. Yeah, Monday morning I might wake up and wish I hadn't put my money where my mouth is. The Patriots might destroy the Giants, making history along the way.

But if they don't...I, for one, will not be surprised.

Super Bowl Update: All Hail the Free Press!

Shari Toomey — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 03:58:38 -0500

In this time leading up to the Super Bowl the First Amendment is hard at work. We must thank our forefathers, having possessed the insight to provide for such vital measures as the free press.

We need the free press to go rooting through Eli’s trash. It is imperative that we know if he uses Tinactin or Micatin, drinks Coke or Pepsi, and if he REALLY eats just the filling out of Oreos.

We also need to know what Matt Light was doing driving someone else’s car at 2:00 PM on a Thursday, and why Randy Moss was seen in a grocery store. If Tom Brady eats Buffalo wings, we need to be informed. The hot bathroom call the next day could affect his performance. Las Vegas odds depend on this stuff.

Photos of Bill Belichick’s home, out of focus, taken from a tree three blocks away, revealed that he DID NOT clean up his dog’s doo after taking the little guy for a walk. What kind of coach is this guy? Will he be this sloppy getting his team ready for the big game? Thank goodness the press is on the story.

And thank The Maker the media spotted Michael Strahan leaving a dentist’s office, then reporting that his gap was un-repaired. Gapgate could have ruined the Giants’ chance at victory for sure. They certainly don’t need that distraction.

Wait a minute. This just in—the point-spread is changing again due to a report accompanied by a photo (again, blurry—almost unrecognizable) of Tom Coughlin smiling in New York.

Rest assured, there are at least one hundred reporters digging away at the story.

Eli Manning: Peyton's Little Brother Makes a Name for Himself

Shari Toomey — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 15:28:07 -0500

Let's play word association.

I say the name "Manning." First thought? Probably Peyton, right? Be honest.

Now what's that other Manning's name? Not Archie...

Draft day, 2004. The Chargers drafted Eli Manning with the No. 1 pick. Problem was, Eli didn't want to be a Charger.

So, he painted a stupid smile on his face as he held the jersey, but not before the cameras revealed his chagrin. He said he'd rather finish his law degree than play for San Diego.

Eventually, he got himself traded to the Giants for Phillip Rivers and some future draft picks. This was not the best way to start a career in the NFL.

By the time the outrage died down over Eli's antics (except in San Diego, where I'm sure he'll always be despised), the season was set to begin. 2004 was a learning year for him, but he did show potential in the time that he played.

When he got the starting job from Kurt Warner the next year, he delivered fairly well. In his first full season as a starter, Eli led the Giants to the playoffs, where they lost their wildcard game to the Panthers.

The 2006 season, however, was not viewed as a success for Eli.

Although it began 6-2, the Giants' record collapsed in the second half of the season—they finished with an 8-8 record. Losing again in the wildcard round of the playoffs, critics of Peyton's little brother were plentiful.

Meanwhile, Peyton was lighting up the league. Pro-bowls, most valuable player awards, playoffs, and even a Super Bowl victory (with Super Bowl MVP honors as well.) Every time you turned on the television, he was there. It's kind of hard to forget him—but that other one; I still can't quite remember his name...

This season, Peyton's little brother decided to throw himself a coming-out party. He latched onto a couple of Peyton's commercials as he tried to demonstrate some charisma. But more importantly, he decided to step up and become a leader on the field.

After being criticized by a member of the Giants ownership, Eli stepped up and drove the Giants into the playoffs—where he finally won the wildcard, and then the divisional.

Last Sunday, in the third-coldest playoff game ever, Eli really showed his stuff.

He calmly managed the game, and he made no mistakes. He was not spectacular—he didn't have to be. As a matter of fact, throughout the Giants' three playoff games, he hasn't been amazing. But he has been pretty darn good.

Mistake-free football wins championships. Just ask his big brother...what's his name?

On Super Bowl Sunday, Eli has the chance to make history. He can be the quarterback who rises up and defeats the mighty Patriots. His name would be emblazoned on trivia cards for all eternity—Eli Manning, Defeater of the 2007-08 New England Patriots.

Sunday dinner bragging rights at the Manning home would be his as well, because his brother—that other Manning—couldn't even beat those Pats.

'Twas the Night Before the Super Bowl...

Shari Toomey — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 06:00:04 -0500

‘Twas the night before the Super Bowl, when all through the plain, not a camera was snapping, no mics in the stands.

The helmets were hung by the lockers with care, for the equipment manager to polish with flair.

The players were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of Super Bowls danced in their heads.

And coach with his playbook, and I with my plays, were planning on putting the other team in a daze.

When out on the turf there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.

Away to the field, I flew like a pass, ran through the doorway and onto the grass.

The moon, on the crest painted on our midfield, gave great illumination to our team’s sacred shield.

When what did my mystified eyes seem to see, an unbeatable team playing in front of me.

With a quarterback tossing so perfect a throw, I knew in a moment his name must be Joe.

More rapid than lightening, his teammates they came, and he huddled and tapped them, and called them by name:

“Right, Jerry! Left, Irvin! Bus, straight through the line! Block, Munoz! Guard, Ogden! Gates, a catch would be fine!

To the midfield line! To the red zone, we go! Now run for the end zone, a touchdown I’ll throw!”

As practice balls before the big game fly, when players are warming, they launch through the sky.

So, into the end zone, the players they flew, high-fiving and dancing, with Super Joe, too.

And then in a moment, I heard a coach’s voice, “Bring on the kicker, one point is my choice!”

I blinked my eyes, and turned to stare, as sure-footed Anderson was jogging out there.

The coach was dressed in a suit, well tailored and pressed, his spectacles on, I was truly impressed.

A fedora he held loose in his hand, his bearing made clear this was no common man.

His eyes, how they crinkled! His face looked so merry, his winter complexion was red like a berry.

His generous mouth was split into a grin, you could see he was a man who was ready to win.

The end of a cigar he held firm in his jaw—a living rendition of the pictures I’d saw.

He had a kind face, yet a gamer’s visage, and I drew in my breath; I was totally awed.

He was forthright and brilliant—a hero to all—with him behind me, no way I could fall.

With a nod of his head, and a wink of his eye, I knew I’d succeed just as long as I try.

He said nothing more, as he turned to the game, congrats for the players as toward him they came.

And raising his arms in game winning glee, and grinning so wide, as the team lifted he.

They carried him off in victory celebration, as silence once more filled the ears of the Nation.

But I heard him proclaim as his wishes he rendered, “The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.” *

*Quoted from a speech given by Vince Lombardi

Where'd the Patriots Park the Bandwagon?

Shari Toomey — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 05:23:56 -0500

The New England Patriots sure did shut me up on Sunday. It's not the fact that they won; it's how they did it...

"What's the big deal?" you may ask. "Everyone knew they were going to win." But the fact is, the Patriots actually HAD to win the game.

Tom Brady did not execute a good performance, the team appeared flat at times—and yet still they won the game. It wasn't 52-3. It was close. As a matter of fact, one almost wonders how the results might have differed if good ol' Coach Norv-someone get this garrote off my neck-Turner had called a better game.

The fourth quarter of Sunday's AFC Championship game was as exciting as they get. The Chargers were actually threatening to do the undoable, beat the unbeatable. I could hardly talk by the end of the game. But the Patriots toughed it out, weathered the storm, and took one step closer to what they feel is their destiny.

I was hoping for the upset (I love the underdog), but braced myself for the thrashing. What I did not expect was a less than perfect, close, competitive game. What the heck? I didn't want to see the other side of the mighty New England Patriots. I enjoyed hating their perfection. Many of us did (I know there are others...). Now, like at the end of every Rocky movie, I can see NFL fans all over America clapping rhythmically, chanting, "Brady, Brady!"

One more win and the Patriots will finish the season undefeated and assume their place in history.

I use the term "undefeated" in place of "perfect," because I think more respect is due the Patriots by looking at their adversities. It's easy to hate perfection, but the Patriots have not been perfect. They are human, just like us.

This demonstration of mortality also makes me wonder if perhaps the commercials won't be the best part of Super Bowl XLll after all.

Pointless Peptalk For Peyton Manning

Shari Toomey — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 07:01:10 -0500

It is my responsibility to give something back to the NFL superstar who has comforted and advised me in my various times of need.

You see, I wanted rock-hard abs. Peyton set me straight. I bought some bigger shirts and I have become more comfortable in my own skin. Thanks to Peyton.

I drive a plain old white minivan. Peyton encouraged me to jazz it up. The flames did not turn out so well, but at least it stands out in a parking lot. Thanks to Peyton.

I have no social life. Peyton suggested that I learn some dance moves. I look like Elaine from Seinfeld, but I am now the talk of the party. Thanks to Peyton.

I was having trouble sticking to my diet. Peyton recommended that I hang out with some linemen. The buffets seem to close earlier than they used to, but I am now the tiny one in the group. Thanks to Peyton.

So to Peyton, I ask:

Bummed about the premature end of your season? Taking your divisional playoff loss to the Chargers a little hard? Can you at least blame it on the kicker? No? Oh wow, that's pretty rough.

Here's what you're gonna do: You're gonna go buy a Giants jersey—maybe with a #10 on it—and you're gonna cheer for that other Manning...

What...sibling rivalry? Looks like this could become a series.

Why Someone Must Upset The New England Patriots

Shari Toomey — Fri, 18 Jan 2008 04:06:17 -0500

Here we go again: The Patriots are great.

Flawless. Undefeated. Perfect.

Oh really?

Then why is it that Bill Belichick had to resort to espionage and point stacking to prove his team's dominance? And why did the stigma that should have followed them through the "greatest season ever" disappear?

I will admit that they played well this season, but so did Shoeless Joe Jackson in the 1919 World Series. Rules are rules.

Drug scandals, personal behavior issues, and criminal activities are tainting the world of professional sports. Young children idolize professional athletes, and lately, there have been way too many negative influences in sports.

There are two ways the bad juju in the NFL can be temporarily repaired: The first is a Chargers victory.

What a great story. Back-up quarterback Billy Volek leads the underdog Chargers to the Super Bowl (perhaps to face the quarterback who might have been?) That would be an upset for the ages, and one I would love to witness. Watching Bill Belichick sulk off to the locker room would almost make his weekly (slight exaggeration) appearances on the cover of Sports Illustrated tolerable.

But fear not. If the Chargers have no rabbit in their helmets, the season can still be saved. How, you may ask?

There are two types of players in the NFL: The first type forgot how much they loved the game when they received their college scholarships; football just became their ticket to fame and fortune. They play well and succeed, but it's all about the show. They hop from team to team, searching for the most money or the best record. The Pats have quite a few of these players.

The second type, however, just love to play. They give it their all, every practice, every down. They usually make a career in one town, on one team. They're the players who stay late at training camp signing autographs, and they'll probably come to your banquet to speak if they're available.

For those of us who love the whole "good versus evil" story line, there is a good chance that Mr. Type Two could be in the Super Bowl this year. Who is this hero on a white steed? (Really? You don't know?)

Two words: Brett Favre. Yeah, baby.

Nothing says wholesome Americana like a thirty-eight year old professional athlete running around in circles, hopping, skipping, laughing, and crying. He's had his own struggles, but he's been honest about them. He is the positive role model you want for your budding NFL star.

This guy loves football. Because it's a game. If you love the game, you can't help loving Brett Favre. How fitting that it could rest on his shoulders to right the negative images suffered by the league this season. He's had a good year, and he plays best under pressure.

Superman always beats the forces of evil. So, we just need him to beat the Giants. He MUST beat the Giants. He deserves another ring. We deserve loyalty, hard work, and good old-fashioned love of the game to persevere.

The NFL needs this season to finish with the picture of Brett Favre–tears in his eyes, arms raised over his head in victory, running amok all over University of Phoenix Stadium–imbedded in our memories.

Then, all will be right with the world.