Bleacher Report - Articles by Thomas Kettler

Charlie Weis Vows to Restore Notre Dame to Gerry Faust Heights

Thomas Kettler — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 21:57:10 -0400

In a press conference, Charlie Weis indicated he will restore Notre Dame to the level of competition seen when Gerry Faust was head coach from 1981 to 1985.

"Consider that in 1984, Gerry Faust led the team to a bowl game in Hawaii. I did the same last year. Also, while I can't recruit in the same manner as Gerry Faust (who can?), I'll coach this team in such a manner that people will say, 'Even Gerry Faust wouldn't have considered such a play in that situation," Weis said.

"Likewise, when I am done here, I'll demonstrate what Gerry Faust could have done with the program if only they had given him a ten-year contract such as I received."

After the press conference, Charlie Weis took all the reporters to the local Pizza Hut, saying, "I do my best thinking while eating an X-Large with double pepperoni and double sausage."

The waitress denied comments regarding how well Weis' tip was received.

There's No Place Like Home? Not True in NFL Playoffs

Thomas Kettler — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 14:18:16 -0500

Pittsburgh and Arizona had best be prepared. This year has demonstrated that homefield advantage is not as valuable as it used to be. Home teams are 3-5 in the playoffs with neither No. 1 remaining. However, both No. 6 seeds (Eagles, Ravens) are playing to be the first set of wild cards to make the Super Bowl.

Another maxim which has decidedly not proven to be true is that you should clinch a playoff spot early so you can rest your starters and prevent injuries. After all, of the five teams that only clinched a playoff spot on the last day of the season, two (Eagles and Ravens) remain. Another, the San Diego Chargers won a playoff game. The final two (Minnesota and Miami) lost to Philadelphia and Baltimore, respectively.

Whether this continues next year or is a just fluke, we'll just have to wait for next year.

NFL Playoffs Are for The Birds

Thomas Kettler — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 17:09:33 -0500

In case you didn't realize it, there are five teams in the NFL that use birds as mascots.

They are the Seattle Seahawks, Arizona Cardinals, Atlanta Falcons, and Philadelphia Eagles of the NFC, while the only birdbrains in the AFC are the Baltimore Ravens.

Of those, only the Seahawks failed to make the playoffs.

Of the four that made the playoffs, three are still alive. The Falcons were the only ones that lost, ironically to another bird team—the Cardinals.

The NFC representative shall necessarily be for the birds and the AFC team may also be.

It would be especially funny if the Super Bowl featured the Eagles and Ravens since both were No. 6 seeds that only made the playoffs on the last day of the season.

Thus, this year's NFL really took flight!

Montreal Expos/Washington Nationals All-Time Lineup

Thomas Kettler — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 14:43:55 -0400

This is the all-time lineup for the Montreal Expos/Washington Nationals. I'm doing this with the following rules:

1) It only considers how they played as a member of the Expos or Nationals so I'm not including Rusty Staub or Ken Singleton since they only played for the Expos for a few years or Pete Rose who only played for the Expos for a few months.

2) I'm also requiring that the OF's actually played the position so I'm not putting Larry Walker as a starter since both he and Vladimir Guerrero played RF.

3) If players were traded for each other, they both can't be used. Thus, Delino DeShields is not included since I'm taking Pedro Martinez as a SP.

Here they are:

Starters:

C Gary Carter (first Expos HOF, hopefully not only)

1B Andres Galarraga (1B has been a weak position for the Expos and Nationals as Nick Johnson can't stay healthy enough to overtake the Big Cat, Al Oliver was only an Expo for two years, Tony Perez an Expo only for three years and they gave up on Cliff Floyd way too early)

2B Jose Vidro (I chose Vidro over Delino DeShields for the reason indicated above and his overall career has been better)

3B Tim Wallach (a solid if unspectacular player, likely to be overtaken by Ryan Zimmerman in a few years)

SS Hubie Brooks (had 100 RBI's one year for the Expos while playing SS)

LF Tim Raines (quite deserving of the HOF, most people never recognized his real value since he was overshadowed by Rickey Henderson)

CF Andre Dawson (underrated as a member of the Expos, overrated while with the Cubs)

RF Vladimir Guerrero (more valuable than Larry Walker, both while with the Expos and after leaving the Expos)

Bench

C Darrin Fletcher (LH-hitting catcher, steal from the Phillies for Barry Jones)

1B Cliff Floyd (played at 1B for the Expos originally, moved to the OF by the Marlins)

IF Wil Cordero (OK player, horrendous human being)

OF Larry Walker (1997 NL MVP although his 1994 season was better)

OF Moises Alou (deserved 1992 ROY over Eric Karros)

PH Wallace Johnson (best PH in Expos/Nationals history)

Pitchers

Starters

RHP Pedro Martinez (nothing needs to be said, had nine-innings of perfect pitching but lost it in the 10th since Expos didn't score in the game, only RHP besides Walter Johnson to have a season with 300+ K's and ERA less than 2.00)

RHP Dennis Martinez (only Expo with an official perfect game, did it against Dodgers at Chavez Ravine)

RHP Steve Rogers (underrated pitcher, didn't get the notoriety he deserved)

RHP Javier Vasquez (Charlie Lea unfortunately was too injured to get a nod)

LHP Bill Lee (somewhat better than Ross Grimsley, Expos/Nationals have never produced LHP other than Randy Johnson who they traded unwisely but his career wasn't with the Expos)

Relievers

Closer John Wetteland (started his career with the Expos after never really doing anything with the Dodgers, traded to the Yankees in 1995)

RHP Mel Rojas (Felipe's nephew, very useful while with the Expos)

RHP Jeff Reardon (overrated although OK as a closer but nothing special)

RHP Chad Cordero (shall hopefully return in 2009)

RHP Woody Fryman (closer prior to Jeff Reardon in early 80's, Reds traded Tony Perez to get Fryman)

LHP Jeff Fassero (started as a reliever for Expos, converted to starter later)

Manager Felipe Alou (Gene Mauch and Dick Williams better overall but Alou best with Expos)