Bleacher Report - Articles by Caleb R.

The 2009 Celebrity NFL Draft

Caleb R. — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 14:33:17 -0400

ROUND ONE
1. Detroit(0-16) WR Jonathan Davis, KoЯn. Finally, the Lions have a stand-out receiver from my NFL Street Team (The Lancers). And, believe me, he catches everything near him.
2. St. Louis(2-14) RB Beavis, Beavis And Butthead. Wow. THE BIGGEST ever surprise taken this high. Beavis completely flunked the I.Q. test and the drug test. So, why take the risk?
3. Kansas City(2-14) QB Sully Erna, Godsmack. Now, Matt Cassel may be good, but Erna was too good to pass up, now, here. He will bomb passes to all of Kansas City's star receivers. Oh, oops.
4. Seattle(4-12) FB Oprah, The Oprah Winfrey Show. Oprah is the highest fullback to ever go in the draft. Now, let's hope that she can back her title up.
5. Cleveland (4-12) RB Megan Fox, T.V.. Who cares? They made a smart choice here.
6. Cincinnati(4-11-1) WR Tom Cruise, T.V.. Cincinnati needs a lot of help, and hopefully, Tom Cruise can help them with his witchcraft.
7. Oakland (5-11) RB Paris Hilton, ????. Al Davis says that his team has a lot of needs and that Hilton should fix the biggest one. Wow, I actually agree with A.D., here.
8. Jacksonville(5-11) WR Michael Phelps, Swimming. Serioously? Phelps didn't go friggin' first. He's a complete beast, out there.
9. Green Bay(6-10) OL Josey Scott, Saliva. Yes, he's a dude, that, for some reason, is just a nickname for him. So, finally, the best offensive lineman goes. And, luckily, as he said in ClickClickBoom. You won't hear no cryin' *** b*thcin' from me (him), like there seems to be on everbody's C.D..
10. San Francisco(7-9) RB Butthead, Beavis And Butthead. So, the other running back from this dream-team running back attack goes. Good luck.

Debate: 'Sheed Or Ron Ron

Caleb R. — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 23:07:36 -0400

Ty Says Ron A.: Ron Artest is obviously the best of the best here. He hits (his) and twos. He plays great defense. He is a winner. Come on. Can you get any better that? Please.

John Says Who Cares?: They're both old and worn-out and worthless. Neither of them should be playing right now, anymore. I can't believe that The Celtics would even sign this friggin' loser. Anyways, I could care less about stupid old basketball.

Dan Says Rasheed: He is a big guy who hits his threes. I love that. He is the beast of the court out there, people. No one (that has been signed, yet, of course) is better than this guy. I win.

Josh Says Artest: He, as Tyler said, hits his threes and twos. He plays defense (Once Again) and he is, still, one of the best (NBA (Basketball)) players out there. Any comments, ya'll.

Jordan Says I Quit: This has gotten stupid because you benched me. Bye.

Yes, once again, Josh, you're not black. Jordan and John are obviously out. I am also sending out Josh. And the winner is,............... Tyler. Sorry, Dan. And our two new guys are........ Ryan W. and Dylan. Say "Hi" to 'em, ya'll. This is your host, Jack, signing out, here, people.

The Top 10 Active NFL Quarterbacks

Caleb R. — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 15:37:26 -0400

(Joe Montana). This is The Top 10 Quarterbacks In The NFL (Currently) List.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... So let's get going, okay??................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Begin Slideshow

Boston Celtics: 2009-2010 Free-Agents

Caleb R. — Fri, 29 May 2009 17:36:59 -0400

Leon Powe—RFA. Back or not?

Yes. I like that Powe brings youth and size to the lineup. He also brings the ability to score to the table he is a three-star at least.

Glen "Big Baby" Davis—RFA. Back or not?

Yes. Another vital three-star on Doc Rivers's team and HE SHOULD BE BACK. Especially over Kendrick Perkins.

Mikki Moore—UFA. Back or not?

No. I think that he was just a fill-in for Kevin Garnett. He cannot score very well (which we need in a player) but he is a decent defender (which we have in our players). Even though he's a Husker, I think that he has to go.

Eddie House—UFA. Back or not?

Yes. Oh, of course. We CANNOT lose one of our BEST three-point shooters out there. He has to come back and I think that he will.

Stephon Marbury—UFA. Back or not?

Yes. This was a VERY CLOSE one but I think that because of what Doc Rivers said about him that he will be back. Remember?, It was about the whole him learnin' to be a team player thing?, Wow. StarBury a team player?> No ******' way!!

Tony Allen—UFA. Back or not?

Yes. Another close one but I think that (his) youth comes to play AGAIN. Allen is not the BEST shooter out there but he is a decent defender and passer and he sould be back next year. But who knows?

Bye,