Bleacher Report - Articles by NBTT

DGUSA Welcomes "The" Brian Kendrick

NBTT — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 01:46:24 -0400

Well B/R, let's get to it. It would seem that Brian Kendrick's talent will not be going to waste. As you already know, he was probably on his third strike with Vinny Mac and was "future endeavoured," like so many others this year.

Imagine my surprise to find out that the newly established Dragon Gate USA has signed him. I'm really happy for him and for Dragon Gate. I was looking at the roster and while it's pretty small, these guys have the potential to do great things.

Dragon Gate USA is actually an extension of the well known Dragon Gate Japan. If you kept up with JLB's articles before he left, you will know that he covered the promotion for a bit along with a few other lesser known wrestling promotions.

The wonderful thing about DGUSA is that the matches won't always feature the guys listed on the site. They tend to bring in guys from Japan from time to time to mix it up with the current roster. Change is always good and you just never know what to expect.

I checked out the official DGUSA site and I'm really impressed. I also took some time to look at some of the roster and even looked up a couple of matches on youtube. These guys are no joke and in my opinion, I think this is the best thing that could have happened to TBK.

From what I've seen so far, most of these guys are high flying, technicians that could really help TBK develop his skills. I personally thought Kendrick was already pretty good, but there's always room for improvement.

I've been to several house shows and have seen him wrestle guys like R-Truth, Jeff Hardy and the latest being Evan Bourne. Kendrick was no pushover in the ring and had better mat skills than a lot of overrated superstars that I know. He wasn't half bad on the mic, either, but I think his weakness was his build.

TBK is a little guy, much like Rey Mysterio and I knew the day he was drafted to Raw that things would not go so well for him.

I'm not saying he should have been in the running for a big one, but he's skilled enough to carry one of the smaller belts.

The explosive matches we're sure to see in the future should help him in the long run. He is set to wrestle his first match on Sept. 6 in Chicago at a DGUSA event. For more information on this and anything DGUSA, check out their website.

If he can stay clean, I'm sure we'll see him back in the WWE (or TNA) in the future but for now, I wish him much success with DGUSA.

~Nef

DGUSA Fan Tribute Video

*Note: Sources include DGUSA official website and wikipedia.

WWE DVD Spotlight and Review: The Greatest Stars of the 90s

NBTT — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 20:27:27 -0400

Hello B/R and welcome to the first of many DVD reviews from yours truly. Most of my reviews will consist of WWE DVD sets but only because I don't own any TNA or RoH stuff...yet.

The reason for my reviews is to help you all decide whether or not it's really worth buying. I'm sure you can look up reviews on Amazon or somewhere else but not all of them will give you what I'm giving you.

You see, lately the WWE has been dishing out DVD sets like crazy.

I think they put out at least one a month so I'm always in Wal-Mart staring at the wrestling section with a contorted look of my face. Most people think I'm staring angrily at the section but the truth is, I'm always wondering which is the best buy.

I plan to collect them all for the most part but until then, I want to purchase only the very best and work my way backwards, you dig?

So...I'm going to break it down as best as I can in the hopes of either persuading or dissuading my fellow wrestling fans to purchase said DVD. Now without further ado, first up on the list is the "WWE's Greatest Stars of the 90s."

Summary

As you know, this DVD highlights what the WWE believes are the top stars of the 90's. Of course you know that means the Attitude Era and the New Generation movement so if you're like me, they pretty much have you sold on that alone.

Disk 1 goes through all of the featured stars with commentary from several current WWE superstars. Each highlight is done with a video package of the featured star as well as a bio that speaks of the superstar's most notable accomplishments. Commentary from other stars is to help support why that star is featured.

Disk numbers 2 and 3 are all matches that span throughout the 90's (Yes, that includes matches that feature Hunter Hearst Helmsley). Most of them are from pay per views, but not all of them.

The special features can be found on Disk 1 and in my opinion, definitely worth reliving.

List of Featured Stars:

Shawn Michaels
Yokozuna
The Rock
Kevin Nash
Owen Hart
Ric Flair
Mick Foley
Hulk Hogan
Triple H
Bret Hart
Lex Luger
Sting
Razor Ramon
The Undertaker
Stone Cold Steve Austin

They also include sections about some of the worst stars or gimmicks of the 90's. That includes several CvC stars. (Ha! The Shockmaster.) A small section is dedicated to the women of the 90's which is highlighted through a short video package featuring women like Sable and Terri Runnels.

The surprising section was another short video package spotlighting the three greatest promoters of the 90's: Eric Bischoff, Paul Heyman, and Vince McMahon.

Featured Matches

I'm not going to list them all because you need some surprises in life. But just so you know, I've watched them all and none of them disappoint. Then again, you're talking about the 90's. These guys today couldn't hold a stick to some of these vets.

Hogan vs Flair - Madison Square Garden - Nov. 30, 1991

Bret Hart vs Shawn Michaels - Survivor Series - Nov. 25, 1992

Bret Hart vs Owen Hart - Wrestlemania 10 - Mar. 20, 1994

Sting vs Vader - Slamboree - May 22, 1994

Diesel & Shawn Michaels vs Yokozuna & British Bulldog - In Your House - Sep. 24, 1995

Mankind vs Hunter Hearst Helmsley - SummerSlam - Aug. 3, 1997 [Steel Cage]

Hulk Hogan vs Lex Luger - Nitro - Aug. 4, 1997

Stone Cold vs The Undertaker - SummerSlam - Aug. 30, 1998

Triple H vs The Rock - Fully Loaded - July 25, 1999

Conclusion

I would probably give this DVD set 5 out of 5 stars, but I have my own reasons. Most of you know that I'm a huge fan of the 90's wrestling programming, so that alone makes me biased.

I have no issues with the chosen stars but if I was a bigger WCW fan, I'm sure I would have loved to see more WCW stars featured.

Also, I didn't have an issue with match quality. All of the featured matches are really good, competitive matches but I will warn you.

If you are not a fan of Shawn Michaels, then get ready to skip a few matches. I left off about six matches or so but just so you know, Shawn Michaels is featured in at least four of them.

ECW is barely mentioned and I'm just guessing here, but I'm thinking Vince's obsession with everything "PG" is the reason ECW doesn't have any featured matches.

Other than that, I think this is a must have for all 90s wrestling fans. Even if you aren't one you should still pick it up and see what real wrestling looks like.

In the meantime, keep a lookout for more DVD reviews by me. Since Vince is making a killing off of all the DVDs I buy, I might as well let you know if it's worth the hype. Until next time...

~Nef

Coming up next, a review of "John Cena: My Life."

WWE Raw House Show Live From Macon, Ga.: A Recap and Review

NBTT — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 20:08:53 -0400

Hello B/R. I am back from my short vacation and now it's time for me to get back to business. I attended the house show in Macon on July 17 and had a really good time. So without further ado, here's how it went down.

Match 1: Evan Bourne vs. THE Brian Kendrick

The first match of the night was scheduled for one fall and it pitted two young superstars that I've never seen fight each other in a match. I'm talking about Evan Bourne vs. THE Brian Kendrick.

The match started off with Kendrick getting massive heat from the crowd. There was even a guy who got himself ejected from the show.

I have no idea what he said to TBK or how TBK responded, but the guy tried to jump the railing which resulted in him getting removed from the show.

It's too bad too. He missed a great match. TBK and Bourne of course, delivered with their fair share of high flying moves.

But believe it or not, most of the match was classic, old school mat wrestling. Hip tosses, head locks - that sort of thing. Bourne won the match but TBK made a great effort.

4 1/2 Stars

Why? Because it had great wrestling, TBK got massive heat, Bourne was so over and everyone was so into it. Would have been a 5 star match but TBK took too long to actually get into the ring. He may have wasted 10 whole minutes arguing with the ref and people in the audience.

Match 2: Primo vs Carlito

Primo made his way to the ring first to a fairly decent pop. He grabbed the mic and called out his brother for a fight.

Carlito came out to a very mediocre pop. I mean, it was almost sad to witness. You would think he'd be drawing more heat than TBK, but I guess not.

Anyway this match had some pretty good wrestling. It took the crowd a while to warm up to the match but by the end of it, Primo was getting a good pop. Primo won the match and got standing ovation. Good for him.

3 1/2 Stars

Because the crowd seemed bored for the better half of the match despite the good wrestling. Carlito's mediocre pop brings the rating down some too.

Match 3: Maryse/Alicia Fox vs Mickie James/Gail Kim

One of my favorite matches of the night. And not because I want Maryse as a pet. Maryse got a ton of heat (could probably rival the heat Orton got later on) while Mickie easily had the biggest pop.

I thought this was one of the better Divas matches. Alicia Fox really surprised me. She did some power bombs (no lie), hip tosses and took a fair share of hits from Kim and Mickie James.

Maryse spent most of the match slapping Kim around and hiding behind Fox when up against Mickie but it only added to her heat. Fox got the pin for their team and the arena practically booed them out of there.

4 Stars

Fox actually wrestled a good match. They get a point boost because of Maryse's hotness and the Mickie mark who was so loud that Mickie actually hugged him after the match. Lucky bastard.

Match 4: Kofi Kingston vs Chavo Guerrero

Kofi got a good pop, but I think Chavo got more heat. Ahhh well...This was a really good match. I mean Chavo wrestled his best match in...well, never mind. Kofi took quite the pounding from Chavo and we even saw some old school Chavo moves. (Or maybe they were actually Eddie's moves).

Either way I was happy to see The Three Amigos (triple rolling verticals) and an almost Frog Splash. Kofi picked up the win due to interference from Hornswoggle. Chavo was getting ready to do the Frog Splash when Hornswoggle appeared pushing him off the top rope.

4 Stars

Not much else to say about this one. The crowd loved seeing Hornswoggle and really got into Kofi and Horny's dance-off at the end. Great wrestling and it was nice seeing Chavo able to stretch his wings a bit proving that he's still an actual Guerrero.

Match 5: Jack Swagger vs. Santino Marella

Well...this was pretty much a squash match though Santino had his moments. The highlight of the match came when Santino was "hulking up."

Swagger decked him with a few rights but Santino pulled a Hogan on him. He did his little run across the ring only to fall victim to a really hard clothesline. Poor thing.

It was a pretty good match though. It gave Swagger some time to show what he can do. And just a side note, Swagger's really cute in person. TV does him no justice at all.

4 Stars

Because Santino was funny as hell. His little speech about Swagger being an "All-American American" in in a country with people who hate him was just too funny. Also, it looked as if Swagger was fighting hard not to laugh, either.

Match 6: MVP vs. The Big Show

Believe it or not, this was a decent match. First of all, MVP got the biggest pop he's probably ever received in his career. I mean, you just had to be there. I was shocked as hell. As for Show, it was no surprise that he got big heat.

The match had a good start. MVP used his speed to get a few cheap shots on Show. After a while though he was hit with a chop that sent him flailing to the mat. After that it was pretty much over. Show tossed him into a few corners and hit a few side slams on him.

MVP tried to make a comeback but ended up "ballin" his way into a chokeslam. Show picked up the win but MVP was definitely way over with the crowd. (I'm inclined to think that we Georgians are strange anyway.)

3 1/2 Stars

It was good but not great. MVP really needs a new look but he gets half a star for being way over with a partially drunken Georgia crowd. (And do all arenas sell alcohol for wrestling matches? Just wondering...)

Main Event - Mark Henry/HHH/Superman (Team Super Friends) vs. Legacy

Well...yeah. You can pretty much imagine how this one went down. Still the crowd loved it, even though I've seen it too many times to really care all that much about it.

But nothing can take away the awesomeness of having Triple H stand over you. He just oozes power.

Cena...the kid sitting in front of me got the wrist bands that could have been mine had he not had a lame sign that said "It's My Birthday."

Cena was right fricken in front of me. But I have let it go and have decided that I didn't want them anyway. Besides, I spent half the night staring at the "Sex on Legs" that is Randy Orton and Ted Jr.

Triple H, Henry and Cena were in the corner closest to me but my camera thought the other corner was much more interesting. Oh well...

Team Super Friends picked up the win and that was that.

4 Stars

Because I've seen it too many times to care. They get 4 instead of 3 since Randy actually dominated the match...er...Triple H. No one dominates Cena, which led to this thought: Could Cena possibly be the new Chuck Norris?

Overall the show gets 4 stars. It was really good and had very few dead spots. The kids got a chance to win autographed copies of 12 Rounds (ha ha) and they let some kids throw a few shirts into the crowd.

Personally, I think every WWE House Show that I've attended has trumped everything they put on Raw these days. The matches are better and the environment is too.

I certainly think it was time well spent. If only I can take back the two hours I wasted watching Potter...

Speaking of Potter, Alan Rickman was bloody brilliant.

Well, that is all folks. I'll be back soon with another serious piece. Probably 200 pages on why I think HBK trumps all and why Jeff Hardy's over rated. Until next time...

~Nef

*Note: The house show attended was the one in Macon, Georgia on July 17, 2009. I sat four rows from the ring and typed this from memory. One or two of the matches may be out of order but I think I got them all.

The Midnight Rockers: Underrated, Yet Often Imitated

NBTT — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 13:27:12 -0400

Hello readers and welcome to another Nefatiri Spotlight. Since I will be spending the remainder of the week getting ready to attend my next WWE house show, I have decided to leave you with a good read. Since everyone seems to be spotlighting tag teams, I thought I'd do the same.

I'm a huge fan of ESPN Classic because late at night I can watch wrestling. To be specific, I watch AWA wrestling; and in my opinion, some of the best wrestling you can watch if you, of course, don't count the international wrestling leagues.

Well, last Saturday night, the AWA spotlighted one of my favorite old school tag teams: The Midnight Rockers. They were making a big return against the formidable team of "Slick" Nick Kiniski and Mr. Magnificent. The two teams would put on an awesome bout, not the greatest match ever, but it was done well enough to showcase the talents of The Midnight Rockers.

Who Were The Midnight Rockers?

The Midnight Rockers or just plain "The Rockers," were a tag team made up of two very talented men: Marty Jannetty and, future Hall of Famer, Shawn Michaels.The two men just happened to meet in a small Kansas territory in 1985. They struck up a partnership after Marty and, then partner, "Bulldog" Bob Brown parted ways and became an official nameless tag team after working a few matches.

The two wrestled a few more matches and even managed to win the NWA Central States Tag Team Championship on May 15, 1986. Their reign was short lived, though, and they lost the belts seven days later. Shawn and Marty parted ways briefly, only to find out that they had both been signed to the AWA because of the AWA's desire to sign as much young talent as possible.

They would end up teaming together, once again, because of booker, Greg Gagne. They wrestled a few matches and it wasn't long before people started noticing how good they were. They got a big push when they were booked to feud against one of the top teams in the AWA: Doug Somers and Buddy Rose. They had a good long feud with Somers and Rose, even managing to tag with Curt Hennig, also known as Mr. Perfect, who is another WWE Hall of Famer.

Shawn and Marty finally won the AWA Tag Team Championship from Somers and Rose after a really long, drawn out feud. During this time in their careers, they managed to catch the attention of Vince McMahon. They signed a contract with the WWF even though they were still AWA Champions. They dropped the AWA belts on May 25, 1987 and left to work for Vince.

The Rocky Road to Success

Shawn and Marty were fired shortly after signing with Vince. I know, tough break for them. Shawn stated on his "Heartbreak and Triumph" DVD that he and Marty liked to party too much. They were unprofessional, according to Vince, and as a result, he let them go.

Shawn and Marty ended up back in the AWA, but it was not doing very well at the time. The WWF was becoming very successful and Shawn knew that it was only a matter of time before the AWA folded completely. After a short stint in the AWA, and an even shorter run in the CWF, they were given a second chance to prove themselves in the WWF.

They would not disappoint.

The WWF fans got a preview of things to come in 1988 when The Rockers made their Pay Per View debut at Survivor Series, winning a 10-Man Tag team match that lead to a feud with The Brainbusters. The feud received rave reviews from the lucky fans who got to see them fight since they were mainly working the house shows.

In 1989, the feud with The Brainbusters was halted for a feud with The Fabulous Rougeaus. This feud resulted in the introduction of the Iron Man Match, and though at least five of these matches took place between the two feuding teams, none of them were ever televised.

In 1990, The Rockers spent the year and then some months feuding with The Orient Express. The Orient Express went through some changes when Akio Sato, one half of the original Orient Express, decided to leave the US. Despite the change, The Orient Express continued feuding with The Rockers, their most memorable match taking place at the Rumble in '91.

The Rockers were one of the best tag teams in the WWF, second only to the reigning tag team champions, The Hart Foundation. There was only room at the top for one team, which meant the start of a new feud. The Rockers and The Hart Foundation—Bret Hart and Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart—wrestled several great matches. Shawn and Bret even wrestled a few singles matches during the feud, giving us a preview of great things to come from the two of them.

Eventually, The Rockers proved to be "better," if only by a few small technicalities and eventually earned themselves a shot at the belts. They wrestled a Two-out-of-Three Falls match on October 30, 1990 and "won" the belts. However, it was not the way that they envisioned.

The match would have probably been an instant classic had the top ropes not broken. When that happened, it made it harder to put on a good show. Shawn even stated on his DVD that it was "terrible." They still got the win, but by WWE records, it never happened. This great, innovative team never won the belts and sadly they never would.

Shawn and Marty split up after Shawn decided that he wanted to take part in singles wrestling. In what would be dubbed the famous "Barbershop Incident," Shawn super-kicked Marty through a window, making him bleed. At the time, it was considered very controversial. The two would not survive on-screen after that and went on to feud, ending their partnership for good.

Why They Were Great

I know. After reading all of this you're probably thinking that I must be crazy. They never won the belts and some of their feuds were average at best so what makes them great? They're great because they were innovative.

Vince McMahon enjoyed The Rockers because they were always coming up with something new. Sherri Martel, former manager of HBK among others, used to watch Marty and Shawn play with action figures. According to Shawn, if he and Marty could do it with the toys, then they could do it in the ring.

The Rockers were responsible for several aspects that are important...uh...were important in tag team wrestling. For example, they did a lot of combination moves. Double drop kicks, enzuigiris, elbow drops—you name it, and they probably did it. They were also high-flyers which later played key in the success of future tag teams like The Hardy Boyz.

They had a strong, coordinated offense but their defensive tactics weren't that bad either. Marty and Shawn dressed alike, except for the hair, so it was easy for them to get away with things that would be considered "dirty tactics." For instance, Shawn might have someone lying in the ring trapped in a headlock. If the ref turned his back for even a second, Shawn and Marty would switch places without the official tag.

This particular tactic, in some form or another, has been used by other tag teams such as The Basham Brothers. Though The Basham Brothers aren't around anymore, tactics like this can still be found in the current product, though slightly modified. Right now I'm thinking about Edge and his "look-a-likes" in the form of Hawkins and Ryder.

Another defense that they used totally caught me off guard when I discovered it. I saw it for the first time the other night when I watched them in action. Shawn was being Irish whipped into a corner but before his back could hit it, Marty threw himself on the turnbuckle taking the brunt of the hit. It happened so quickly that I wondered if I even saw it to begin with.

That. Was. Awesome.

Setting the Bar

The Rockers may not have won any gold during their time in the WWF, but they certainly left their mark. Chris Jericho, the first ever Undisputed Champion, has gone on record saying how much he loved The Rockers. He complimented their look—which gets an eyebrow from me—charisma, and their high-flying style as part of the reason for his success having started off in his career imitating Shawn.

While The Rockers didn't have much success, Shawn certainly has enough accomplishments to make up for it. I would list them all, but, seriously, I'd be here all night. He has had several nods from PWI for Match of The Year, Feud of the Year in 2008, winning the big one at Wrestlemania 12, and of course, being the center of controversy. Shawn has done it all despite the lack-luster success of The Rockers.

Marty has done some wrestling since the break-up but nothing that can compare to the huge list Shawn has accumulated over the years. I find it quite heart-breaking considering Marty was just as good in the ring as Shawn. Watch the videos and I dare you to say otherwise. He even made an attempt at a come-back.

On the March 14, 2005 edition of Raw, Marty made an appearance which resulted in a Rockers reunion for one night only. The two did very well, especially since it had been years since they stepped in the ring together. That very same week on Smackdown, Marty wrestled in a match against Kurt Angle. Marty lost the match but he showed that he could still move in the ring.

Several things happened with Marty, some personal problems that landed him a release from the WWE. He would return again in 2006 to work an angle with Shawn and the McMahons, but he was a no-show during one of the tapings and you know what that means.

Though each former Rocker chose separate paths—one successful and the other not so much—it doesn't take away the impact that they had together on the evolution of the WWF.

Because of the bar they set, we got teams like The Hardyz, Edge and Christian, and London and Kendrick. Their high-flying style, even after disbanding, led to Shawn being the highlight of the "first" ever ladder match; something that was so unbelievable it led to the creation of Tables Ladders and Chairs matches and Wrestlemania's own Money in the Bank Ladder match.

The Rockers may never crack the top ten of anybody's list but they'll certainly never be forgotten - at least by those in the industry who imitated them.

In the meantime, get comfortable and watch the vids. I promise you won't be disappointed. The things they did were innovative for the time but even I couldn't help but pick out moves I've seen superstars of today rip off from them. I'm sure they're both flattered. Until next time...that is all.

~Nef

The Rockers Return to the AWA

Part 1

Part II

The Rockers Reunion in 2005

The Rockers vs La Resistance

List of Accomplishments

Two-Time AWA World Tag Team Champions

NWA Central States Tag Team Championship

Two-Time AWA Southern Tag Team Champions

1989 Tag Team of the Year - Wrestling Observer Newsletter Award

PWI Ranked No.33 of 100 Tag Teams "PWI Years" in 2003

*Note: All of the following information can be found on Wikipedia, "Heartbreak and Triumph: The Shawn Michaels Story", and in the WWE Encyclopedia.

Meeting With the Boss [III]

NBTT — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 00:02:41 -0400

Because people have been sending me countless e-mails, blowing up my Blackberry, stalking my Facebook page, and camping outside my house, I have no choice but to share my secret information with all of Bleacher.

So without further ado, I have the recordings of the last couple of meetings I sat in on with the boss.

For the record let me just state that I really don't understand why so many people are down on Vinny Mac. I'm just not completely convinced that Vince is a terrible boss.

I happen to know first hand that he's a great listener and is very understanding. Hell, he only wants what's best for his company and is constantly changing the way he runs his business to cater to all demographics.

But you people aren't convinced but after reading these next couple of sessions, I'm sure you'll see things my way.

Meeting 1 - Divas

Vince is currently sitting behind his desk with his feet propped up and a huge cigar in his mouth. There's a knock on his door and several voices can be heard outside of it. Vince rolls his eyes and after a few seconds yells for them to enter.

The door swings open and in walks Maryse, Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim, and Michelle McCool. All of them look angry except Maryse. Then again, it's hard to tell when she's angry.

Vince: *raises his brows* What can I do for you all? And hurry it up. You're ruining my "me" time.

Maryse cuts everyone off by talking loudly in French which earns her quite a few confused looks.

Vince: Wait a sec. What the hell, woman? Speak English! Only English in my presence!

Maryse: *blinks several times then flicks her hair* Mr. McMahon, I cannot take dis eenymore. I am terribly...how you say? Unhappy wit my current role in dis company. I want to do something else.

Vince: *annoyed* You're the Divas champion. What more could you possibly want?

Maryse: *cuts Mickie James a disgusted look* I cannot work wit her. She is making me look bad. Just look at her! She eez fat!

Mickie: *shocked* WHAT?!? HOW DARE YOU! I AM NOT FAT!

Maryse: *grins* I think she eez eating a bit too many of the french fries az you call them here een Emerica.

Vince: *studies Mickie for a few seconds then frowns* You know Maryse, you've got a point. She HAS gained some weight. Mickie, until you lose about 20 pounds, then I'm afraid you cannot possibly wear the Divas belt.

Mickie: But-

Vince: *raises his hands* I'm sorry but you can't. This belt is for Divas only and until you look like a diva then no belt. Therefore Maryse will retain the belt at Night of Champions and move on to work with Gail Kim.

Mickie James curses loudly before storming away, screaming something about Victoria having the right idea. Meanwhile, Maryse makes another annoyed sound rolling her eyes in the process.

Vince: What now, Maryse? I know you're beautiful and all but there's only so much I can do ya know.

Maryse: *smiles* Well sir, I wuz just wondering eef I could work weeth Kelly Kelly. She eez, no doubt, the most fit person here. Next to moi, of course. I'm sure we could get along just well. *flashes Kelly Kelly a smile*

Kelly Kelly just stares at Maryse with a blank look on her face. I'm not sure she knows what to think of the suggestion. Vince looks over at Kelly Kelly and shrugs.

Vince: Whatever. What are your plans?

Maryse: *laughs* Oh well. I'm sure we will come up with something. *grabs Kelly Kelly's hand* Come along Ms. Kelly Kelly. We have things to do.

Kelly Kelly: Uh...does this mean I get a title shot soon?

Maryse: *grins* But of course.

The two leave hand in hand with Maryse yapping happily in French. Meanwhile, Gail Kim and McCool are the only Divas left.

Gail Kim: *clears throat* Uh...sir? I...I was wondering if I could actually win a few matches now. I've been back for quite a while now and unlike some people, I can actually wrestle.

Vince: You were on TNA. TNA is for losers. Therefore you must lose like a loser until I decide you're a winner.

Gail Kim: Um...But I'm 1 and 14. Can I at least-?

Vince: You're dismissed. Oh and by the way, I'm moving you to Raw.

Gail Kim: But what about my title shot? Teddy Long promised me a shot at McCool's belt at Night of Champions.

Vince: Not going to happen since you're moving to Raw. Besides, I called McCool in here to tell her that since The Undertaker is one of my favorite superstars, I've decided to let her keep the belt for the next four months.

Gail Kim: But that's not fair! She's keeping the belt just because she's dating some creepy old guy?

McCool: That's right and you better watch your mouth about what you say about my man! He's the best thing that's ever happened to me. Not my fault no one wants you.

Gail Kim: Can't see why he wants YOU. *mumbles* Sex changes can do wonders for some people.

McCool: What did you say?

Gail Kim: Nothing.

Vince: Well I've had enough Divas for one day. You're both dismissed.

Both ladies leave Vince's office though I can't help but over hear something that sounded strangely like "maybe I should kill off Stephanie McMahon" coming from Gail. I also thought I heard McCool say something like "Shawn's next on my list," but maybe I was hearing things.

Meeting 2 - Matt Hardy

Vince: What can I do for you?

Vince is currently sitting at his desk going over some paperwork. Matt walks in but Vince hardly looks up from his work.

Matt: Well boss, I was hoping I could convince you to give me push towards the big one now. I think I've earned it.

Vince: *as he scribbles something down on paper* What makes you think I'd want to do a silly thing like that?

Matt: Well...I have dedicated my life to this business. All I do is go out there and give 200 percent every time I step foot in the ring. I job when you want and I even go out of my way to look after Jeff.

Vince: And you keep doing that. I need Jeff.

Matt: Uh...right. *nervously* So um..how about it, boss?

Vince: How about what?

Matt: The title push.

Vince: I'm already pushing Jeff. I don't need to push you too.

Matt: *looks hurt* But why not boss? He's on Smackdown. I'm on Raw. It could work. Plus, I'm not asking to win it just yet. I just want to get in on the hunt so I can get better. I'd like to work with Shawn before he retires. I could learn from him just like Jeff learned from Hunter.

Vince: *lazily* Because no one cares about you. You should know this by now Matt. Ever since you and Jeff were The Hardy Boys, it was clear even then who was destined to become a star and sadly it wasn't you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have paperwork to finish.

I watch as Matt Hardy leaves with blank look on his face. He has his Blackberry out and appears to be tweeting about something or another. I'm really feeling bad for him right now because I personally like him better than Jeff. But that's just me.

Meeting 3 - The Hart Dynasty

Vince is on the phone with some very important people. Apparently they are telling him bad news because all kinds of obscenities are escaping his lips. I don't think I should repeat what I heard. He finally slams the phone down and there's a knock on his door.

Vince: *growls* Get in here and make it quick!

The door opens and in walks Nattie, Tyson, and Smith. Tyson and Smith look a little nervous but Nattie seems angry.

Nattie: Vince, I want to wrestle. What good is all my training if I can't use any of it?

Vince: Lose 30 pounds and then get back to me.

Nattie: But...But I can really wrestle! I can really move in the ring! I know tons of submission holds and-

Vince: Get OUT of my office unless you want to end up like Bret - screwed.

All three members of the Dynasty look highly insulted but rather than argue with Vince in his bad mood, they quickly left the office.

Of course, Nattie made sure to mumble "Savage for Hall of Fame" before slamming the door leaving a distraught Vinnie Mac to brood. I wonder who was on the phone with him? Ahh well... Guess I'll never know.

Well that's all I have for you. I don't know if I'll be sitting in on any more meetings. Seriously. What's the point? I don't see anything wrong with the way he runs things...Not really.

Okay. So maybe Mickie James doesn't need to lose weight but when you think about it, she doesn't really fit in the "Divas" category. Most of those chicks can't really wrestle but Mickie can. Same goes for Nattie.

And Matt...well, I really don't know what to say about him. His brother Jeff has always been the more popular of the two so I'm not really sure why he hasn't realized this by now.

However, I do believe he should have a title shot because like it or not, he has been more loyal than Jeff. At least he actually signs his contracts and never takes time off to work for the rival company.

Until next time...if there's a next time. FREEDOM! JUSTICE! TRUTH!

~Nef

*Note: You know full well none of this ever happened...not to my knowledge anyway. I have my own opinions about said superstars but this was written in a non biased way. This was really all in good fun using all the rumors that you hear on the net about the the things that go on in the wrestling business.

So take that for what it's worth. If you take this, seriously then you need to get a life. Also, I realize there are spelling errors but I did it on purpose to fit Maryse's accent.

John Cena and the Era of PG: Going Beyond in Search of Truth

NBTT — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 02:18:33 -0400

Yes. I'm going there because quite frankly I am tired of hearing it.

There are several people that like to post articles telling adults like me that I should stop bashing John Cena so much because blah, blah, blah.

Most of those people love to use the same arguments, and they go a little something like this:

1. Most of you people who hate Cena are living in a dream world. Most of you are probably all Attitude Era lovers, but get over it. The Attitude Era is never coming back.

2. Put yourself in the kid's shoes. You were a kid once.

Those are the main two, which gives me plenty to work with here later on.

So I think it's high time I clear up the issues about John Cena and this PG Era of wrestling. I'm going to discuss the evolution of Cena, and from there I'm going to tell you why I hate, but love Cena.

I'm also going to set the record straight for Attitude Era lovers, because quite frankly, the arguments against the Attitude Era are getting old.

I'm sure some people won't agree with everything I have to say, but that's fine. We can debate the issue until the Apocalypse, but I highly doubt you will change my mind. Just ask Ray.

Part 1: Who Is John Cena?

John Cena made his debut on WWE TV wrestling Kurt Angle on Smackdown. While he didn't win the fight, he certainly raised a few eyebrows and had everyone talking.

Just who is this nobody who almost beat the Olympic Gold Medalist? With a little change in "Attitude" and a new dress code, John Cena was born.

A cocky tweener who had rhymes for every opponent, his hip-hop mentality drew in a whole other demographic.

Finally there was someone outside the Triple Hs, JBLs, and the Hardyz.

He was by no means a great grappler or mat wrestler, like Hunter, nor did he fly around the ring like a Hardy. And he certainly didn't look the part of a wrestling god, like JBL, but that didn't stop Cena from pushing his way to the top.

Pretty soon his pumps, rhymes, and attitude caught on and he found himself facing JBL at the biggest stage of them all, fighting for the WWE Championship.

I, myself, was proud of Cena when he won the big one.

He made me laugh each and every night on Smackdown when he was doing some childish antic, such as smacking Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley on the rear or telling Michael Cole that no one likes him.

Cena was by no means a kick-ass wrestler, but what he lacked in the ring he made up for on the mic. Anyone who watched Cena prior to his move to Monday Night Raw cannot honestly tell me that Cena didn't have you cracking up.

Heck, even after he was put on the so called "A" show, he still managed to make me laugh.

One of my favorite raps from Raw started with a really bad Carlito's Cabana gone wrong. Several superstars, including Angle, HBK, The Big Show, and Edge all got on the show, bragging about why they deserved a title shot.

Cena got tired of hearing it and thus responded with this.

I was going to type it out since I had it memorized, but it's rated TV-14 so I don't want any trouble. It's not for the PG era and I'd hate for the kids to see the real John Cena. It would just ruin them.

That being said, I was a huge fan of Cena. He was funny, unique, and had a charisma that was fun to watch unfold on the screen. That was Cena circa 2005. So what happened?

The Marine happened.

The Marine happened and it was a hit. Kids and people everywhere loved it (I'm assuming) and so they never dropped the gimmick. After Cena filmed his first movie, he became even more popular. Kind of like The Rock after filming The Scorpion King, but unlike him, Cena came back.

And so with more fans than ever, Vince took notice. How could he not when Cena's shirts, caps, and wrist bands were topping the best seller's list week after week? And parents were even buying more of the really expensive (IMHO) replica spinner belts.

Cena was a gold mine and because of this, things started to change.

Part II: The PG Era Begins

The changes were gradual. For instance, I think the first thing that I noticed was that there weren't many chair shots used. Edge didn't do the con-chair-to as often as he used to.

They stopped using so much foul language and there was very little blood spilled. Then I noticed Cena's title runs were really long...

It never used to bother me when he was spitting rhymes every week, but for some reason I grew frustrated seeing him win at PPV after PPV to retain the belt.

The last straw for me was Wrestlemania 23.

For the record, unlike most people, I absolutely hated the main event. Not because Shawn lost, but because Cena had his ass handed to him for a majority of the match only to "overcome the odds" and win again.

That was the moment I realized that everything was so...wrong.

Just what the hell is going on? I watched people like Batista, Edge, and Orton rise to the top. It wasn't that bad, but then when things started to get a little repetitive and predictable, I found it easier to pick the shows apart.

For instance, I noticed that 90 percent of the time, if Hunter's in the run for a belt, he'll win it.

I noticed that Cena would always overcome the odds.

I noticed that all the Divas were getting tinier and tiner with each coming year.

I noticed that the entire WWE programming became centered around key people with others getting little to no time to shine. This includes, but not limited to, Matt Hardy, Shelton Benjamin, Carlito, Victoria, and London/Kendrick.

I didn't have a problem with Edge or Orton because they were younger and deserved some spotlight. Their feuds with DX and Shawn/Cena were actually pretty good, so I was really impressed.

But after a while the shows started getting staler and staler, to the point where it hurt to watch. Then I find out that the WWE was slowly making everything "family friendly" which pretty much explained it all.

So why blame Cena?

I blame Cena because of his fan base. I have the right to blame him because, like it or not, it's the truth. Cena sells tickets and merchandise to little kids and celebrities everywhere so why shouldn't I blame him for making me watch pointless antics every week?

On the other hand, one can't really blame a great businessman like Vince for taking advantage of the situation. He capitalized on the things that were making him money so you can't really blame the guy.

So what's the problem with Cena?

Part III: Cena vs Cena

The problem is not necessarily Cena the person.

You see, a lot of people absolutely despise John Cena right now. Hell, can you REALLY blame them? The wrestling that a lot of us grew up watching is no longer there.

Hell, the tiny glimmer of hope that should be found while watching ECW each week has been ruined by the PG Era started by Cena's movie success.

That is why he is hated.

But get it right. Most of us true wrestling fans understand that there are two Cenas. There is the Super Marine character that's portrayed on TV each week, and then there's John the person; a spokesperson, future humanitarian and lover of all WWE fans.

How can you possibly hate that guy?

While I despise Cena's current character like I despise PG wrestling, I do NOT hate Cena.

John Cena the person was best described by Paul Heyman in an old blog of his.

"While I would dare suggest that Shawn Michaels is a superior in-ring performer, or that Edge has more range, or that Triple H understands 'The Game' better than Cena, none of them can even hope to compare to his ability to serve the needs of World Wrestling Entertainment."

I couldn't agree more and he continues by explaining why this is so.

"He doesn't mind being away from home for weeks, indeed months on end. He doesn't mind getting up at 5 a.m. to do media call-ins. He doesn't mind flying to several cities on his rare days off to promote the upcoming shows. He doesn't mind flying to the set of a WWE Films-produced movie, doing his job there, and then flying directly to make every booking, in every city, at every event WWE Raw promotes. Cena is a workhorse. He's a tireless promotional machine. And the project, event, DVD, pay per view, film, CD, and merchandise he promotes are all branded 'WWE'."

This is also why John Cena is Vince McMahon's dream come true.

You can read the entire piece by Heyman here but I tell you he's on to something. A guy that dedicated to the business... Who am I to say he doesn't deserve to be where he's at?

When you look beyond the character on screen, you realize that Cena's just as passionate about the business as we are.

This is why I cannot hate him. I can hate his character all day (and I do) but I'm not one of those people that go around bashing him for all he's worth.

I respect the guy and I wish others cared as much about the business as he seems to.

I like John Cena.

Part IV: Clearing Up the Myths

There seems to be a myth around here that says Attitude Era lovers are the ones who hate Cena.

That is not entirely true.

I have friends that just started watching wrestling a year ago. They all dislike Cena because he's too "perfect." He never does anything wrong and his whole character is "inhuman." (The whole searchlight thing made them laugh.)

There's also a big myth that Attitude Era fans hate wrestling today. Again, that's another lie. Yes, I grew up watching wrestling during the Attitude Era, but I also watched prior to that era.

That era of wrestling is better known as The New Generation Age.

In my opinion, The New Generation trumps the Attitude Era simply because of the performers. Shawn, Bret, Diesel, Razor, Taker...Vince did great to push those young stars because all of them turned out to make history and revolutionized the business in ways we never thought possible one person at a time.

All of them will be emulated, but never duplicated or outdone.

But even without the antics, the New Generation had something to keep you wanting more each and every night. I doubt you can find a single person to dispute that watching Shawn Michaels or Bret Hart main event a Monday Night Raw during their prime wasn't great TV.

Hell, those guys were so good that they didn't need gimmicks to get the audience's attention. The Attitude Era just took it a step further to help a failing company. They had the New Generation wrestling with the "attitude" needed to bring WCW to its knees.

My point?

My point is that most lovers of the Attitude Era also appreciated the actual wrestling and not just the crazy antics put on by DX, The Rock, and Austin.

We often times feel gypped while watching today's wrestling because while it has all the crazy antics, it lacks the better half which is wrestling. Sure you have a few exceptions to the rule, but that doesn't cut it. You need a good combination of both to make a great show and these days its failing.

Either way, it doesn't mean we hate today's product. We just expect more.

Is it really the PG rating that's causing the problem? You tell me.

The New Generation wrestlers are proof that you can still have a great show each week with just plain old fashioned rivalries minus the crazy antics. However, the Attitude Era proved that you could have both.

So what's happening today?

It's clear to me that we're not getting that golden balance of the two. For instance, Raw seems to be the more story driven show while Smackdown is all about the wrestling. ECW is just there.

Part V: Change

No one likes change.

I, myself, find change to be a pain in the ass, but it's inevitable. Everything goes through periods of change—evolution, so to speak—and it's most common in the entertainment industry.

When I was in college, I took a literature class titled Critical Theory. In this class, we talked about something called paradigms. A paradigm is defined as "a set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that constitutes a way of viewing reality for the community that shares them, especially in an intellectual discipline."

In other words, it's basically the way the people of the world perceive things at the time.

This is the perfect word to describe the entertainment industry, because what's perceived as popular today may not be that way tomorrow.

The same can be said about sports entertainment. It is constantly evolving to fit the needs of today's paradigm.

The New Generation evolved into the Attitude Era because the paradigm shifted. The people were no longer happy with just good old fashioned wrestling. They wanted real life drama mixed with violence, sex, and comedy to entertain them.

This is what they wanted and eventually they got it.

In 2005, we saw the business slowly start to evolve again, eventually leading us to this PG era of wrestling. I credit Cena for it because he's the biggest star of this time, just like Austin is credited for the Attitude Era (NWO arguably for WCW). We are still in this period, but for some of us, it's no longer as popular as it used to be.

There are some adults who love this new age of wrestling. (I don't know any, but to be fair, let's just pretend that this is true.) And of course the kids love it. Cena, Santina, Jeff, Bourne...The kids love them.

I respect these guys, but to say that I love them would be going a bit too far.

Part VI: The Truth, My Truth

The truth is, I'm sick of the "character" Cena. I'm sick of Jeff, who is highly over rated in my opinion, and Santina is beyond a disaster.

These are just my opinions and I feel this way because I want more.

"Put yourself in the kid's shoes."

I do and have discovered that wrestling is the best thing ever when I pretend that I'm nine years old.

But I am not nine years old.

I am a 22-year-old adult who is not happy with everything that's happening today in wrestling. That includes TNA.

I've been a huge part of three eras of wrestling; four if you count the Monday Night Wars as an era. This is why I get angry at Raw. I get angry because I KNOW they can do better. I've seen it...four times!

In my opinion it's getting time to evolve again. It seems that Vince is only thinking to cater to his young viewers more than his older ones. I understand that, especially since he has grandchildren. I'm sure he wants them to be able to watch mommy and daddy on the big screen from time to time.

I understand, but it's not fair.

It's not fair to the older viewers who have been loyal to the business for years. Most of us stood by the WWE every week, even when the New World Order was kicking our ass night after night.

I get angry, like so many others, because we're starting to feel left out. Why can't he cater to both demographics like he used to in the past?

And don't tell me it can't be done, because I've seen it done before. Back in the day, there was Raw and then there was the Raw Zone. They tended to do the more adult things during the second hour of Raw.

Kids should be in bed by 10 p.m. anyway, especially during the school year. So, yeah. Damn right I get angry, and I'll probably continue to be angry until they get it right.

So in conclusion, you should have learned from this ridiculously long piece the following 10 things:

John Cena is responsible for this PG era of wrestling.
There are two John Cena's, but only one is to blame for today's PG rating.
All Attitude Era lovers are not just haters of Cena and everything PG. If anything, they learned to appreciate good drama and good wrestling before and during that era.
We can't get mad at Vince for doing what's right for his business. At the time, PG was probably a good move for him even if we hate it right now.
The New Generation/Attitude Era still pwns the Age of Cena and Orton. It will continue to trump this era until things are done differently.
Don't assume you know why people hate the wrestlers they hate or love the ones they love. You know what assuming can do for you.
John Cena is John Cena. He is no Rock, Austin, or Hogan. He is the leader of his own generation and is HoF bound.
The current product has several directions it could go. The New Generation was mainly young talent tearing down the house every night in main events. The Attitude Era focused on the drama and comedy. Both worked for their particular paradigms.
A new paradigm will come. Change is inevitable. You can't stop it and I'm not about to try.
This was the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

~Nef

*Note: The definition of paradigm can be found here. Most of my information came from various sources including wikipedia, the official WWE archives, John Cena's DVD, and from my head because I grew up watching it all.

Meeting With the Boss: What Really Goes on at Headquarters [Part 1]

NBTT — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 03:36:11 -0400

Have you ever wondered what goes on in some of those mandatory meetings that Vince and the other WWE Superstars attend? You know, the life-altering meetings with creative that decide who does what and who goes where?

Well, I had the privelege and honor to sit in on one of these meetings so I am here to share my expierience with you all. Mind you I taped the entire meeting just so I can replay everything just as it happened.

I hope this will clear up any rumors about Vince and the creative team being tyrants. Really. They only want what's best for us and the company, so here's part of the proof.

All of the wrestlers are sitting in a huge room at corporate headquarters. Most of the creative staff, as well as Vince and Paul, are seated at a long table near the front of the room. The meeting began with an intro from the Billion Dollar Princess herself and continued as follows.

Stephanie: Good evening, my fellow entertainers. I know some of you probably wanted to go home for some much-needed rest, but it can wait. This is more important. I just wanted to take this opportunity to let you know that--

Vince: *coughs* Ahem. Excuse me. Stephanie. Princess. Uh...where exactly are you going with this? What's this meeting all about?

Stephanie: *startled, blinks several times and forces a smile* Well father, if you just hold on a second. I was getting to that.

Vince: Oh. Yeah. Sorry. Continue. *takes a loud slurp of his iced coffee and nods*

Stephanie: As I was saying, today's meeting is about all the changes that are going to be taking place in the months to come. We at creative feel that we need to change it up a bit. I think we need to be more...edgy. *laughs nervously* That being said, I really want to start pushing that TV-14 rating. We need more violence and bloodshed and--

Vince: Uh...Princess? Just what...in the hell are you talking about?

Stephanie: *winces* Well father, I just...I've been hearing things lately about our show and well...quite frankly people don't like.

Vince: But we're selling a whole lot of merchandise! How the hell do you explain that?

*cough* Cena *cough*

The office erupted into laughter and I spotted Cena lowering his hat over his eyes, his face turning red with embarrassment. I almost felt sorry for him...almost.

Vince: ALRIGHT WHO SAID IT? WHO THE HELL MENTIONED CENA?

*sustained silence*

Vince: Alright then. Fine. But you know what? I don't give a damn because John Cena is a *bleep* hero! *pounds fist on the table* He is the best thing that ever happened to this business!

Shawn: *mumbles* You said that about Austin and DX just a few years ago.

A couple of guys laughed at him. Even I couldn't suppress the chuckle that escaped me after that one. I suddenly realized that the room was deathly silent so I went back to my note taking. Vince continued.

Vince: Anyone else says anything about John, and you're fired. I have no problem firing any one of you. Hell, Cena's the one drawing all the money so I could give a damn about the rest of ya.

Shawn: *prays silently* Lord help me. Please help me to think only of my family back home because I am two seconds away from walking out that *bleep* door. Oh *bleep* I just cursed. *bleep*! I need to pray. *closes his eyes and starts reciting something in Latin*

Bob: So uh...what were you saying about being "edgy" Ms. McMahon...er...Helmsley...Levesque...ma'am?

Stephanie: I was just thinking that maybe some of you could change up your acts a bit and maybe we can do more on the shows. We tend to save all the specialty matches for pay per view, but in the past we never thought to do that so much.

Tables, chairs, cages...we used to do it all on Monday nights but now we've gotten slack. I say it's time we spice things up a bit. I'll start with you Cena.

Cena: *hopeful expression on his face* Yes maam?

Stephanie: How about we lose the whole "Marine" thing? It's not working for us anymore and--

Vince: *sputters almost incoherently* I beg your pardon, young lady! Did I not just say to leave Cena out of this?

Stephanie: Yes, but father he really needs to--

Vince: Keep doing what he's been doing because he's making me richer than rich! Move on to somebody else.

Stephanie: *sighs* Alright then. Uh...Benjamin. It's high time you stop being a jobber. I want you main eventing in two years. I was thinking you could win the Money in the Bank--

Vince: Like hell he will! I think Kennedy should win it.

Benjamin: KENNEDY! But sir...I've been here longer than him and--

Vince: And haven't had a decent match since you've been here!

Shawn: *whispers to Mark* Is he serious? * Mark nods* Oh hell, guess I need to pray harder. *mumbles* Decent match?! What the hell was he doing the night I almost got my rear end handed to me?

Kendrick: *raises hand nervously*

Stephanie: Yes, Brian?

Kendrick: Since we're going for a more edgy approach, do you think London and I can maybe--

Vince: Oh! Thank God you opened that mouth of yours. *Brian blinks looking slightly confused* Yeah. About London...HE'S FIRED!

Kendrick: *squeaks* But why!?

Vince: Because I didn't think much of him...Or the tag team division for that matter. *shrugs shoulders* Kendrick, I guess that means you're fired too.

Kendrick: *blinks then bursts into tears*

Shawn: ALRIGHT! THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOU! KENDRICK STAYS! YOU WILL NOT BE FIRING MY STAR PUPIL! HE HAS PLENTY OF POTENTIAL TO BE GREAT SOMEDAY AND I BE DAMNED IF I'M GOING TO LET YOU FIRE HIM LIKE THAT!

Vince: *chuckles softly* As if you have any say so on the matter.

Shawn: *growls* You fire him and I'll go. I'll walk out here today and call Jarrett tomorrow. Imagine the kind of match I could have with Styles, Angle, or Sting.

Vince: *shrugs* Go. Have fun on the second-rate show. I don't really need you that much anyway. Besides, it was Paul's idea to bring you back. I personally agree with Bret because you were a pain in the ass. Still are, actually.

Shawn: I'm out of here. *gets up and storms out of the meeting slamming the door as hard as he can while shouting things in Latin*

Cena: Hey. Wait...boss...sir...I don't think...*hesitates*

Vince: *suddenly interested* Hey! Speak up, son! Whatever you say I'll listen Mr. Money...I mean Cena. *grins his creepy grin*

Cena: Well...sir...I think you are forgetting about Mania which is only three months away. Hunter...Er...Paul is injured so--

Vince: Oh yeah. You'll be needing an opponent for Mania. How about JBL?

JBL: *scoffs* This Wrestling God would rather burn his cold hard cash than to job to Captain America again.

Cena: *suddenly embarrassed* Uh...I wrestled him two years ago.

Vince: Oh. Well how about Edge?

Edge: Hell no! I'm not rolling around the mat with him! The last time I wrestled him he tried to kill me! I almost died but does anyone care? No!

Cena: Isn't he supposed to be in the MITB? Besides he's on Smackdown.

Vince: Alright then. Jericho. How about Chris Jericho?

Jericho: I haven't even made my official return yet. Besides, I refuse to defile my perfect body rolling around the ring with a misogynous egomaniac who is literally sickening to look at. The sight of his wrestling matches borderline parasitic in nature because--

Vince: SHUT UP!

Chris: Fine. I'll shut up but mark my words, Vince. The only one you need to worry about is me. Chris Jericho. The only person to ever beat both--

Everyone: THE ROCK AND AUSTIN IN THE SAME NIGHT!

Vince: Fine! *turns to Cena* Well you know anyone?

Cena: The guy that's about to walk out the door sir. Shawn. I'd like to wrestle Shawn.

Vince: *scratches his chin* Well...I suppose you two can wrestle. I'm sure you'll make him look really good for his old age.

Patterson: *his body's practically shaking at this point* I could just-- The nerve of him to say things...Wrestlemania 12...

Mark: *nudges Pat in the side* Calm down. You know Vince is off his rocker. I figured that out a long time ago after seeing the Lex Express in my neighborhood.

Vince: I think that's all the time we have for today.

Stephanie: But dad, I haven't even--

Vince: I have to get my hair cut and you're not going to make me late. Cena's situated so that's all that matters. You're all dismissed.

Stephanie: *mumbles under her breath* I can't wait until you're old enough to be put in a home. Senile old...

Vince: Did you say something, Steph?

Stephanie: *forces the world's cheesiest smile* No sir. I was just...leaving.

Vince: Come on and ride with me sweetheart. I have major plans for you to outline in the next meeting.

I sat quietly and watched as people filed out of the room, most of them dropping f-bombs all over the place.

I scoffed. Are they serious? How dare they question the chairman! He knows what's best for the company and has made it his business to give us our money and time's worth week after week.

So what's the problem?

I decided that I needed to sit in on a few more meetings in order to figure it out. I talked with Shane over the phone and he has given me a pass to sit in on every meeting that they have, even minor ones.

The next meeting will take place exactly one week from today and I will return to give you the inside scoop because I have made it my mission to give the people what they want and that is justice! Er...the truth. Until next time people.

~Nef

*Note: None of this ever happened. (Go figure.) But in the slight chance that it did then wow. Poor Stephanie. I am not expressing my personal beliefs about any of the superstars. I am merely using rumors or common misconceptions about each person/wrestling persona to make you guys laugh.

Oh yeah. And Bob's just a lowly, underpaid intern who may or may not exist. You'll be seeing him a lot.

The Truth and Nothing But The Truth

NBTT — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 01:00:58 -0400

I am usually posting rants about everything that's wrong with wrestling, but I felt so good after watching this week's Smackdown that I decided to post my first uh...well, it's not a rant. It's more like I am going to shower Smackdown with praises because it made my day.

I'm not really sure where they're going with Punk's character, but who cares? I loved his opening speech. He pretty much said that he didn't care if it was Hardy or Edge. He was going to get his, despite the outcome of the ladder match. I loved it. Punk still got a pretty good pop, at least until the Hardy boy made his entrance. Hardy got a huge ovation, as usual, and really got in Punk's face. I like the aggressive Jeff. It works for him.

Edge was great as well. Edge is the reason some heels are fun to hate. His speech to Punk about how he was trying to figure him out made me laugh. But you know what? I did notice that Punk seems to be the guy who thinks things through and takes the simple way out. I would say easy, but a match against Edge or Hardy would not be easy in the least. It was an excellent start for the night and it kept me glued to the screen.

There were too many things right about the tag match featuring Truth and JoMo against "The World's Greatest Tag Team." First, Truth and Hardy, and now Truth and JoMo. This was a great match that showed the athleticism of all four athletes. Truth and Benjamin were just amazing while JoMo really put it to Haas. I hope Vince was watching. At least two of those guys should be main eventing next year.

"I have set Rey Mysterio free." Those were Chris Jericho's words ringing in my ears as I laughed until I cried. I swear Jericho is a Wrestling God. I know that was JBL's title but Jericho has risen to the throne and has taken his place as Jibble's successor.

Say what you want, but JBL was freaking gold on the mic.

I cannot tell you how many times I've muted the television when Randy Orton was given a mic, but for some reason I cannot bring myself to mute Jericho or Edge. Edge is amusing, and with Jericho...I just seem to hang on to his every word. Narcassist or not, he has got the best persona in the WWE right now.

Let me move on, because I seriously could be here all day sharing my love for the new Wrestling God.

Jericho and Punk had a really good match. I was happy that Punk was able to wrestle a good, long match because it helps him look better in the eyes of the Wrestling Universe. People see him as a fraud because a lot of people never saw him wrestle for RoH. I'm not the biggest Punk fan but I realize he's pretty good.

Having him ringside for the Hardy-Edge match was good too; and let me just say that I applaud those two guys for even wrestling a match at all. I'm pretty sure they weren't just putting on either. They're part of the reason why I get pissed off at people who say wrestling is fake.

The entire Smackdown show was phenomenal. You may not think so and maybe it wasn't, but I've seen so many bad episodes of Raw that Smackdown seemed like Heaven to me. Great show and if you didn't watch, you should.

"That's the truth. The whole truth and nothing but the truth." ~ R-Truth

~Nef

I've Had It: The Cena/Orton Era of Doom II

NBTT — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 02:32:06 -0400

It's no secret that WWE's Extreme Rules sucked but I was hoping that everything that happened last night happened for a good reason. Apparently not.

Therefore, I guess this series of rants will continue and I will get right to it. (In case you missed part one, you can read it here.)

Nothing about the Extreme Rules pay per view made any sense to me at all. I'll start with Tommy Dreamer winning the ECW title.

Most people are generally happy that he finally won the belt, but I'm not one of them. I've seen Tommy Dreamer job so much that it's really hard for me to even consider him a credible champion.

To me, it's like they slapped the belt on him just so he can tell his grandchildren someday that he held the belt.

Moving on...

Chris Jericho winning the Intercontinental Championship for the unprecedented ninth time is just amazing right? Yeah...right.

It's no secret that I am a mark for Chris Jericho. I love that guy. I think he should be running the whole damn show and then some but I am not happy that he won the belt.

The credibility for the belts is already at an all time low so why give the belt to Chris when Rey is capable of keeping it a little while longer?

Rey is back on Smackdown where he belongs. People like JoMo, Truth and Ziggler are a few of the people he would have been facing in the future to defend his belt.

Those are guys he could have easily had great matches against, so giving the belt to Chris made no sense at all to me.

It's a pretty safe bet that Chris won't be keeping it very long because it's only a matter of time before he is in the running to face CM Punk for the big one.

This whole throwing the belt around is not the way to go if it's not necessary which brings me to Batista and Orton.

How much sense did it make to take the belt from Orton? As much as I think Orton's a complete snooze fest, he is drawing quite the heat as a heel, so why? I suppose someone of a higher power feels the same way because Batista is now injured.

How serious is it? I have no idea as I'm no medical expert but that just means the belt swapped hands for nothing. Nothing at all. Just so they can put it back on...never mind.

The big ladder match between Edge and Jeff Hardy resulted in Jeff Hardy winning the belt again. Wow. Congratulations to the Enigma.

He certainly deserved his win considering he's going to be sticking around for quite sometime. Uh...right.

So why did Punk choose to rain on his parade by taking the belt from him? I have no idea considering a PG-rated program isn't going to make Punk any better as a heel champ if he doesn't have the room to act as a heel.

As for the rest of the show, no one really cares so I won't waste my breath.

Moving on to Raw...

I'm not sure if I'm just living in the dark ages or Raw really is quite terrible these days. I mean, I thought it really couldn't get any worse than last week's Raw but boy was I ever wrong.

The opening segment consisted of a "healthy" Batista coming out to address his audience of screaming fans. (Said with heaps of sarcasm).

I mean really, did you guys hear that pop he got? I didn't think so.

It's really sad when the champ doesn't get much of a reaction from his loyal fans that Vince seems to think that he has following him every week.

Anyway, since the Internet is the fastest news source on the planet everyone just knew Batista was hurt but we were all wondering how they would take Batista out of the title picture.

The whole scene with Legacy supposedly "taking him out" would have been way more believable had the chair shot from Cody looked real. I swear Orton's sidekicks cannot act. They are terrible. Nothing they do these days is remotely believable.

So Raw was off to a disastrous start. Am I really supposed to believe that Legacy took out Batista? You know, the really big guy who calls himself "The Animal"?

Next up was one of the shortest non-title matches ever. Probably not, but it wasn't nearly long enough for me to enjoy it. And to make matters worse, it was supposedly featuring the Intercontinental Champion.

I know. We all make mistakes but I couldn't just over look it. Anyway, I don't know how I feel about the match. Regal's a great veteran while Kofi is a great up and coming star.

However, it did not sit well with me that Regal had to lose in such a short, crappy way even though they are trying to build Kofi to a high status. It doesn't make him look good if he's not in long enough matches to show off his athleticism.

Moving on...

The Divas match. I'm still confused as to why Kelly Kelly is wrestling every week against the Divas champ because she never wins. What are they doing? Are they trying to make Maryse look like this deadly Diva assassin?

If they are then they're going to have to do a lot better than that because Kelly Kelly jobbing to Maryse every week isn't good enough.

On the plus side, it's looking like Mickie James will have another chance to prove herself and revive the Divas division. Maybe all is not lost.

Matt Hardy faced off against MVP after the "ballin" star told the Universe that he would be inserting himself in the running for a shot at Randy's...er...Batista's...er somebody's WWE title.

As much as I like MVP, I'll be going against everything I stand for if I say his match was greatness. It was not greatness, which is sad considering we know what both men are capable of. But it wasn't terrible, either. It was just...dead.

Very anti climatic and once again the audience failed to connect. Whose fault is that? Well, I'll let you decide.

The six-man tag match wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I have to look at this as an attempt by the creative to at least do something with a random group of guys that don't even belong on Raw. So good job, creative.

Now all you need to do is give them a name and you'll have a fresh but weird-ass stable to use to your liking. I vote "The League of Extraordinary Jobbers". Throw in TBK and you're practically unstoppable!

Vickie Guerrero. The fact that she had some block buster announcement was scary as hell. In fact, any announcement that Vince or any of the GMs have these days can have you sweating bricks but I decided to be optimistic.

Hell, I was so optimistic that I went so far as to hope for an announcement regarding a new WWE Draft to make up for the crap one they had this past April. Boy was I wrong...again.

She quit. She was so devastated after her humiliating pig pucky match that she decided to do everyone a favor and quit. While I hated VG as a wrestling "fan", I did not hate her as a person who understands that Vickie was valuable to the company.

She drew about as much heat (probably more) than Jericho or Edge. As a fan of wrestling, I looked forward to hearing her say "excuse me" every week so I can hate her for it. (Of course, "heel mark" Jerry Lawler would have been in tears after the speech.)

I will admit that it was worth it to watch Edge prove why he's one of the top heels in the business. His speech to Vicki was probably the most entertaining part of the night unless you count The Miz's speech about Cena.

Edge got such a huge pop that I'm wondering whether or not he's in the midst of a face turn. Maybe...maybe not but you never know these days. The creative team at WWE is just full of surprises these days. Found that out watching their last pay per view.

The main event was a joke but it was worth it to see the return of someone who can at least carry the show for a while. Triple H. I figured he'd be back sooner or later but glad it was sooner rather than later.

His interaction with Legacy only proved why they are completely useless as a stable. How much sense did it make for each of them to try to take on The King of Kings and Mr. Sledgehammer one at a time?

Wouldn't it have been more effective for all three of them to just jump him? And because of this, Randy gets his ass handed to him for the second week in a row; this time by a former 13-time WWE/World Champion rather than a 60-year-old retired champ.

Once again, Randy proves that he is not a coward. He is a "viper" ready to strike at any moment. He is the very definition of a champion ready to take any one on at any cost. Yeah. Something like that.

John Cena and the Big Show. It's no secret that people are tired of Show and Cena's feud. Hell it's been going on for so long that I can't even begin to explain why they started feuding in the first place.

Their submission match will stand as a testament as to why this feud should end NOW!

Their match from Extreme Rules should have put an end to it but apparently not since once again, Show interrupted Cena's match against Miz in order to lay out the former champ in the middle of the ring...again. Same crap. Different day.

In a surprise ending to the slaughtering of John Superman Cena, The Miz retaliated by popping each one of them with a chair.

So what now? We have a Miz/Cena/Show feud? I'm confused as hell but that's nothing new. I've been confused ever since Extreme Rules ended.

So what have we gained from a weak pay per view and an even weaker Raw? Uh...I don't know. We got Trips back but there's only so much he can do.

ECW is going to be interesting to watch. I can't wait to see how they make Tommy Dreamer look like a worthy champion.

As for Smackdown, I'm sure it will deliver. I know Jericho's speech will be worth hearing even though the credibility of the IC belt has gone down a couple of notches since April. (JBL...Rey...Jericho. Who's next?)

In conclusion, I can't even come up with a good conclusion because I'm confused as hell. It all goes back to my first rant about all of the mistakes they've made that got us to this low point in the first place.

However, here's my attempt at a summary for this entire rant in the form of a list.

1. End the Cena/Show feud, which should have ended Sunday night.

2. At least let Jericho keep the belt for a while. It will make up for you stupid people taking the belt from Rey, and Jericho can put someone over big time at SummerSlam.

3. Do not give the belt back to Batista. No reaction = bad champ.

4. Get rid of the PG rating. I cannot stress this enough if CM Punk is going to make a decent heel.

5. Let Jerry Lawler go back to being a heel mark.

6. Get rid of the Divas belt.

7. Tommy Dreamer needs to actually win matches if you want someone to believe he's worthy to be champion.

8. Matches should be longer than three minutes.

9. Give Lillian a vacation.

10. Make Legacy watch old tapes of DX circa '97-'98, The Four Horsemen, The New Age Outlaws, and the NWO. Unless they learn how to be an effective stable, then people will continue to take them as a joke each and every week.

I'm Nefatiri and that's what I think. Stay tuned for part three of this series because at the rate they're going, this will be a 50-part series.

I'm sure the publicity stunt of a three-hour Raw next week will have me seething with anger. (Though for the record, my expectations aren't high at all.)

~Nef

WWE Superstars: A Breath of Fresh Air

NBTT — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 14:30:27 -0400

A lot of people here on B/R probably watched the first episode of WWE Superstars and decided it wasn't worth watching every week, but I can assure you that it is.

In fact, I am convinced that it's one of the best "wrestling" programs that the WWE has right now.

Last night's Superstars had three great matches and the main event was explosive. The first match put the team of Goldust and Hornswoggle against The Brian Kendrick and Jamie Noble.

The match was full of comedic moments at the expense of Brian Kendrick but it gave Goldust a chance to show his athleticism. Behind that shiny gold suit of armor lies a man with good wrestling skills.

I was very impressed and Goldust really showed he's actually a good wrestler and not some nut job in drag. He certainly has more skills than a certain Legacy member.

Moving on...

The next match featured a guy from my favorite stable right now. David Hart Smith, accompanied by the rest of The Hart Dynasty, made his way to the ring to face off against Tommy Dreamer, one of the opponents facing Christian for the ECW title this Sunday.

Christian joined Striker and Mathews for commentary to elaborate on Hart and Dreamer, which was pretty hilarious.

The match was full of old school mat wrestling. While Hart had the upper hand for the first few minutes of the match, after the commercial break it is Dreamer that's all over him.

Dreamer, in my opinion, wrestled one of the best matches I've seen in quite sometime. The crowd was really into it and the presence of Christian and the other Dynasty members made it even better.

The match ended when Christian stopped Natalya from getting a chair in the ring to Hart. While Christian was occupied with the ref, Tyson was able to slide in the ring and help Hart get the win. Great match over all.

The main event was just as good. It featured everyone's favorite enigma Jeff Hardy and my personal favorite, rising star R-Truth against Dolph Ziggler and Chris Jericho. This match exceeded my expectations and turned out to be explosive.

Jericho and Ziggler exchanged a few words in the ring before the match. Ziggler extended his hand to Jericho but he hesitated.

After several seconds, Jericho gave him the nod of approval and it occurred to me at that moment how so much alike they are in a weird way.

Hardy and Truth...Jericho and Ziggler...Coudn't have been a more perfect match on either side. Both of these teams worked together like they've been partners for years.

Ziggler could very well be a young protege of Chris Jericho while Truth could easily replace older brother Matt. (No diss to Matt. I just call it like I see it.)

Truth has an incredible athleticism that I fear goes completely unnoticed...until last night.

Truth and Hardy did several combo moves that included one that Jeff and Matt did all the time, Poetry in Motion. It was sweet, especially since it was Truth doing the leaping.

Overall it was a great show. I gave it five stars despite the use of a little green guy and his Tadpole splash.

The Goldust match was the comic relief but unlike most Monday nights, there was plenty of actual wrestling and the crowd was into it all the way through.

If you have been giving WWE Superstars the snub each week, I really encourage you to check it out. This is probably the only show where you're going to get good solid wrestling matches featuring stars from each brand.

I have been watching each week since its debut and I've seen Ted Dibiase outwrestle Cena and I've seen Jericho and JoMo bring down the house, so check it out. Until next week, folks...

~Nef

I've Had It: The Cena/Orton Era of Doom Is Killing Us (Part I)

NBTT — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 03:41:06 -0400

I have had it! I can't believe I even made it through all of Raw last night, but I'm glad I did. I'll get to that in a second.

People all over B/R have been posting their own takes about Orton, Kennedy, and Raw's future so it's my turn to tell you all what I think because let's face it, what I think matters more. (Take note that I'm only kidding for those of you who tend to take things too seriously.)

Also, I am ready to defend everything I say in this article so by all means feel free to try me. I'm not one for holding my tongue but some of you wouldn't have me any other way. You know who you are.

Moving on...

I've managed not to post any articles complaining about Raw every week. Why? Because there's no point in complaining. It won't change a thing. Trust me. I complain in the WWE Universe forums all the time and not a damn thing has changed.

But after watching last night's Raw, I feel the need to add my two cents for what it's worth.

Raw had the potential to be absolutely the best it's been in ages, but they failed. They failed miserably and it's sad which is why I am about to call them all out.

I'll start with the Divas match. I don't understand why they insist on pushing Kelly Kelly. The chick is hardly a wrestler. I understand why they feel the need to push her. The Divas division is lacking in every way possible so they are trying to make wrestlers out of models.

The first mistake they made was starting that stupid Divas search. I say stupid because the only result of it was creating more useless talent to be used as eye candy for the male WWE audience. (In the defense of most of my male friends, they tend to actually enjoy the wrestling women like Mickey James rather than the eye candy.)

The second mistake was the creation of that stupid Divas belt. What the hell were they thinking? (Said in a true Bischoff like tone.) I think its really sad that they even created the belt to begin with. It only confirms to the WWE audience what we already know which is none of the Divas can hack it in the ring like Lita and Trish used to do.

So to make up for hiring a bunch of useless talent, they slap a another belt on them to make it look like they have something going for them. (Although in the defense of Michelle McCool and Maryse, I've seen a ton of improvement. Maryse really works her heel role and so does McCool.)

But I'm not marking for either of them. I feel like its so sad that people like Gail Kim, Mickey James, and Beth Phoenix get reduced to jobbing while the 'Divas' get all the attention. I feel especially bad for Mickey since Trish passed the torch to her in a way when she retired from the ring.

I also feel bad for Victoria but she's where she needs to be. TNA may have lame story lines but their knockouts are fun to watch. Even Kong with her brute strength puts on a good match.

Now for Cena.

We've had this discussion various times over the course of several articles but I feel the need to correct a few people. For starters, I don't believe that Cena is universally hated by the entire Attitude Era marks like me. I am pretty certain that it's his character that is disliked.

I mean seriously. So what if we cheered him as a 'rapper' or a heel? At least during that time he wasn't made out to be this unstoppable force that everyone was supposed to love. His feuds with Angle and JBL is what made people like him to begin with. Now he's so lame.

They've turned him into this All-American Super Power who can overcome everything. His character is almost straight out of a bad comic book series. Here's a preview of the next issue.

John 'Superman' Cena, former U.S. Marine and all around good guy has to face the biggest challenge of his life. The Big Show, standing 7 feet tall weighing over 400 pounds has threatened to turn Raw into TV-14 so that little kids everywhere have to go to bed at 10 pm. Oh no! Can Cena overcome the odds once again and defeat this 500 pound monster? Or will all the kids in the world be sent to bed at a decent hour so that adults can enjoy quality programming? Tune in next week to find out!

Now I don't want you Cena marks out there to think that I am bashing him because I'm not. I know that its probably not his fault that he has to keep his lame ass 'Marine' character, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.

Cena's been shoved down my throat one too many times and Sunday will prove my point. Cena has to constantly remind his viewers that he has to "overcome adversity" and they do this by making sure that the "odds are against him".

In the end, it leaves a lackluster, predictable program because we all know Cena will prove the haters wrong and come out on top.

My hatred of the Cena character has absolutely nothing to do with his 6 Moves of Doom or the fact that most of his promos consist of childish screaming. My hatred of Cena runs deep into his character and how he continues to dominate ALL THE TIME! (Most recent example being his defeating Jack Swagger.)

Moving on...

The next popular subject of discussion around here is the "future stars of the WWE". Great topic for me to hammer next and I'll kick things off with a quote by HBK.

"The ones I like best are the 'futures of the WWE', or the 'stars of tomorrow', or my favorite of all time is the 'greatest in ring performer of his generation'. I am STILL waiting to face that guy!"

I'll start with the recent marking of stars like The Miz, John Morrison, CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, MVP, Mr. Kennedy, and Randy Orton. There are others but these are the main ones that I will pick apart like an old car.

The Miz, formally known as just the side-kick of John Morrison, has managed to increase his popularity in less time than it took for the DX reunion to establish Triple H as a solid face again. And all he's done in the last five weeks is insult John Cena with every fiber of his being.

And you know what? I've found myself falling victim to his charisma on the mic because let's face it, he's saying what I've known all alone. He's calling Cena out for the corporate lap dog that he is. It's all scripted but it's all true.

In a nutshell, The Miz is talented enough to become great someday but he's got a long ways to go. As for his former tag team partner, he's way ahead of him.

John Morrison is the single most talented of the younger superstars. His biggest rival right now is Shelton Benjamin but let's be real. Benjamin is ahead of the game. Hell, he's so great that he should be competing against the likes of Super Cena and Triple H and not jobbing every week to put others over him.

Its a noble thing to do when you're a veteran like Flair. I realize that Benjamin has been in the business a lot longer than some of the others, but he hasn't the stats like Michaels, Taker, or even Edge to be considered a veteran. Stop making him job, Vince. He's the best you have right now with JoMo running a close second.

Punk. Punk's not one of my favorites, but I give credit when it's due. This guy has a lot of appeal and is a superstar already if they use him right. I am happy with his performance in the ring.

His straight edge character is what it is. He's not trying to be superman or anything like that. He just goes out there and puts on a 'wrestling clinic' as JR would say, slowly establishing himself as WHC material. (And just a side note. He's not diving off of titan-trons to get attention either.)

He deserves all the hype that he's getting and I wish him the best in the future.

Last night, I watched Kofi Kingston win the U.S. title. I am happy to see that this kid is about to get a potential push. I say potential because you never can tell these days. I like Kofi a lot. I think that putting him on ECW was a great start because he got attention on a third rate show and his popularity has given him a loyal fan base.

While he may not be epic greatness right now, he's charismatic enough to keep the fans entertained and put on a good show. I feel like over time, he will improve a lot. Having that belt should earn him some great feuds with hard workers like Regal, Matt and maybe even HBK.

The fact that MVP dropped the belt tonight makes me wonder whether or not the WWE will put him in the running for a feud with Randy Orton. He should have been in the running a long time ago.

His feud with Matt Hardy established him as a solid performer and by carrying that U.S. Belt around for so long, we knew he could do bigger and better things. Let's just see how this plays out.

Mr. Kennedy. No doubt everyone's ready to storm Vince's corporate office in Connecticut with pitchforks demanding to know why he was released. Why do something so rash when you already know the answer? Well...maybe you don't so I'll tell you what I think happened.

Mr. Kennedy is and has always been a little over rated. I'm pissing some of you off but deal with it. I'll back it up.

When Kennedy first gained his popularity it was on Vince's second rate show, Smackdown. He wrestled "great" matches against MVP, Matt Hardy and even The Undertaker.

After defeating the Deadman, Kennedy was hoping to be placed on Raw during the draft in order to take on current champion John Cena (or maybe it was Hunter. Either way, I'm sure it's a logical guess considering things).

It didn't happen.

But, he did finally manage to win himself a MITB ladder match only to be forced into giving it up to Edge after injuring himself in a match. Kennedy comes back sometime after his injury and re-establishes himself with the fans as Mr. Kennedy.........Kennedy (said loudly with lots of feeling).

But when he returned that time, I hardly found myself getting excited about his matches. Sure his whole 'mic-falls-magically-from-the-ceiling' gig was cool, but what else? In my humble opinion, his matches were no better than the ones put on by MVP yet he was getting the push.

They try again. He once again starts wrestling, gains appreciation from the fans for his gimmick and then rushes off to film a movie. He makes his return later only to suffer another injury at a house show thus ending another potential push.

In conclusion to the Kennedy saga, I don't think he was all that great in the ring. I think his gimmick is what attracted a lot of people because let's face it. Most wrestlers with great gimmicks can get away with a lot of half ass moves in the ring simply because their marks are too blind to see the areas in dire need of improvement.

I never thought Kennedy to be careless in the ring, but if he was then he slipped up one too many times and got called out on it.

As for the argument about his health, you can't blame Vince for getting rid of him. What use is Kennedy to Vince if he can't perform? You all saw how the media hammered Vince when Beniot died.

Marc Mero (stupid idiot) and all of the world news programs tried to pin this incident on steroid use in pro wrestling or lack of a good wellness policy. So...quite naturally Vince is going to take better care of his wrestlers. With business the way it is today and wrestlers dying left and right, he's going to make sure his actors are in good health.

And in fairness to everyone who swears Batista is taking steroids, I'm sure his backstage "politicking" is the reason he's still around which leads me to my final victim of the day, Randy Orton.

Man, if I had a dime for every time I've had to listen to speeches or read about why Randy Orton is a God, I'd have enough money to take that trip to Japan I've always wanted. What the hell is wrong with some of you people? And the funniest one I've come across is where someone actually compared him to Bret Hart. What...the...hell?

And if you're reading this then I am sorry but I'm letting you know now before someone else does in a mean way that Orton cannot touch Bret Hart.

In fact, half the wrestlers wrestling today, with the exception of Angle, Sting, Shawn, and Benjamin couldn't last ten minutes in the ring with Bret during his prime.

Orton's hardly what I'd call a great "technical" wrestler. When I hear the word technical in wrestling I think of four people: Bret, Angle, RVD, and Benoit.

Orton is one of the leading heels today and a future superstar. I won't deny that but let me point out that it was much more entertaining watching him climb to the top. Now that he's there, he's having a hard time convincing me that he deserves to be there.

It took a retired, 16 time World Champion to bring out the intensity I expect from someone who has deemed himself a "legend killer". Ric Flair... I really didn't want to see him wrestling or 'fighting' as they call it now, but I'll be the first to admit that the most entertaining parts of Raw involved the Naitch.

Flair's screaming at Orton, telling him to "grow a set" led to some great, intense words from Orton.

Normally Orton bores the hell out of me on the mic but I noticed a change in him last night. His chemistry with Flair brought out an intense, yet highly entertaining heel/face promo that had me eagerly awaiting the demise of Flair in the parking garage.

I didn't expect the 'fight' to be worth watching but it turned out to be the best part of the night. I really felt Flair's dislike of Orton and their dislike of each other played out really well. Even Batista's role came off better than it has in the past few weeks.

I will add to this that Orton is coming off as a "punk" because he never wins anything without the help of his two lackeys. And let me further add that while Edge doesn't always win fairly, his character is the Ultimate Opportunist. He can get away with it.

People will say that I'm wrong about Orton. That's what you think. I happen to think I'm right. Just because he makes a few intense facial expressions and pleases his servants every week with an RKO does not make him greatness.

Edge is by far a better champion and has been through hell to get there. I mean really, have you ever seen Bob Orton Jr. in a TLC match? I didn't think so.

Edge has been through a lot to get to where he is and is more deserving of his position than Orton. I'll even go as far as to say that Randy has probably engaged in a bit of "politicking" (Kennedy firing theory) but what big name hasn't?

As for the rest of Raw, I am no more looking forward to the next pay per view than I am to next week's Raw. And you know things are bad when they have to get Michael Cole (who's a complete bore) and Jerry (who needs to go back to being a heel mark) to literally beg people to buy the pay per views.

The Santino/Vikki feud is absolutely horrid and is another reason why I want to throw my TV out of a window sometimes. While I realize that they've done pig pucky matches in the past, can someone please tell me how the hell that match qualifies as "extreme"?

Or maybe my definition of extreme is extremely different.

This age of wrestling programming is killing me slowly. The only things that are keeping me glued to the tele each week are HBK (when he's around), Flair (sad huh?), Smackdown, and ECW. Yes, I said ECW but that's an argument for another day.

Whether you agree or disagree, it doesn't matter one way or the other to me. In the end, nothing will change anyway unless Vince or whoever is "politicking" backstage deems it necessary.

I'm complaining because of the First Amendment and will return to complain more next week with a part II. Why? Because I fear the Age of Doom is going to be around for a lot longer than we'd like.

I'm Nef and that's what I think.

CvC: Oz Is the Worst Gimmick Ever. No, Seriously, It Is

NBTT — Sat, 30 May 2009 07:50:28 -0400

I just could not pass up an opportunity to talk about a gimmick I happened upon while watching my very own copy of the WWE's Greatest Superstars of the 90s DVD set which can be bought on wweshop.com.

Anyway, I've come across quite a few interesting gimmicks but this one made my chest hurt as I laughed.

Oh, the pain!

Oh, the horror!

And to make matters worse, he was actually a pretty talented wrestler in his day; still is actually if you count TNA.

My nominee for worst gimmick of all time? "Oz"!

For those of you who haven't the slightest clue as to who or what an "Oz" is, allow me to explain. (And for the record I am in tears trying to type this right now.)

First of all, before there was "Oz" there was "Steel", who was one half of the tag team called the "Master Blasters". (Dude. I'm not making this stuff up. It really happened.)

Sporting a really bad mohawk, "Steel" would go on to do much of nothing and would eventually be forced into singles wrestling a year later after the team disbands due to the lack of reliable partners. Go figure.

His third attempt at a persona would eventually earn him a ticket to the WWE. Just his luck, he ends up catching the eye of one of the greatest superstars of all time. But before there was "Vinnie Vegas," there was "Oz".

The "Oz" character was supposedly based on the (you guessed it) - children's book dating back to the 1900s titled The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. The silver-haired, modern day (but not really) Dumbledore from Harry Potter-ish persona, led to big things for "Big Sexy" Kevin "Oz" Nash.

No. Just kidding. The whole idea sucked.

For starters, if your character is based on some old guy from a children's book that's nearly 50 years old then it's probably a bad idea. Not to mention old guys shouldn't be swinging people around the ring merry-go-round style. It's not logical and it doesn't look right.

Secondly, I don't know if it was bad because it was Kevin Nash as "Oz" or if it was the really bad lime-green wizarding robes of doom. Then there was the entire entrance itself. The theme song...

I was eating a bowl of cereal and letting the song play on youtube and the longer the song played, the harder my laugh got until I eventually had to put away my cereal for fear of getting milk all over my laptop.

The wrestling? Pretty good. Nash has always been a decent wrestler. The promos? Mehh...not so much.

I mean, how seriously are you going to take someone whose wearing a horrible mask in desperate need of plastic surgery while saying hocus pocus-like things under really bad neon lighting?

I didn't think so.

Okay. So maybe "Oz" isn't the worst of all time, but he's getting my vote. Shawn Michaels, I'm glad you spotted "Vinnie Vegas". I shudder to think where he'd be today if it wasn't for you. Probably dressed as the Tin Man since the "Oz" thing didn't work out.

References

*Information on the Evolution of Kevin Nash can be found on wikipedia or on the DVD WWE's Greatest Superstars of the 90s.

Theme Song and Robes of Doom

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jDPydDvceE

Really Bad Promo of Doom

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3k_9YLGhgTc

~Nef

Enjoy!

One More Match and My Life Would Be Complete: The Evolution of Two Icons

NBTT — Thu, 28 May 2009 22:00:55 -0400

I have been following WWE programming for 17 years, although I must admit to the short hiatus I took following Wrestlemania 14.

I was so distraught about Michaels' and his back that I just couldn't bear to watch anymore. Or so I told myself that and ended up experiencing one of the coolest times in WWE history.

Anyway, I've seen quite a few big matches during my 17 years, the first major history-making matches being Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart and Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon from Wrestlemania 10. I'm sure there were others before that, but those are the ones that stick out in my mind.

Owen's match against his older brother Bret was a fantastic match that to this day I believe is one of the greatest of all time.

I've always thought Bret to be the better technical wrestler of the two, but Owen hung in there and showed that he was a rising superstar in the WWE. Their strong story-driven rivalry certainly helped the anticipation of the match.

In a way, I feel kind of bad, because most people don't really talk about the match. It's not that they don't remember it but Wrestlemania 10 has always been known for another match on the card; a match that revolutionized wrestling and featured the person who would become Bret's biggest rival in less than two years time. That match was the first-ever ladder match in the WWE.

The ladder match concept originated in Canada. Most people don't know this but the first ladder match to ever take place in the WWE was actually wrestled as a trial between two of the biggest rivals of all time, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels, at a House Show in Philadelphia.

Vince loved the concept and after a whirlwind of real life issues that took place between Shawn, Vince, and Razor, the perfect scenario was created for two men to change wrestling forever.

Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon put on quite the show. They did things in that match that people had never witnessed before. I used to think that the match was overrated. "What's the big deal about a splash off the top of a ladder? Jeff Hardy does moonsaults now!"

I didn't understand that during that time period, a splash was a big deal. Most of the high flying that Shawn did was quite the experience and he was doing things that would only inspire others to revolutionize someday.

From 10 I'll skip to 12, Wrestlemania 12 to be exact. This was the pay per view that featured two of the best ever in the business pitting them against one another in an Iron Man Match for the WWE title.

This match was another match that I enjoyed at my young age, but again, at the time I had no idea why it was such a big deal. As a young wrestling fan, all I knew was that in my heart I was torn between my two favorite wrestlers battling it out on the big stage.

I wasn't against Michaels but I wasn't entirely against Bret either. I loved Bret. I loved how he catered to his fans but I also couldn't help but stare at my television in awe every time Michaels stepped into the squared circle.

I'm sure that part of the reason I catered to him so much was because I thought he was drop-dead gorgeous, but I really did love his fast-paced, high-flying style in the ring.

Watching those two battle it out for an hour as a child was good but watching it again as an older, wiser wrestling fan made all the difference in the world.

It wasn't until then that I understood the significance of this match or why Bret and Shawn were two of the greatest of all time.

Shawn would go on to defend his belt with a vengeance, earning props for his gutsy performances and cut throat promos.

Most people tend to blame Michaels for WCW crushing Vince in the ratings. He was after all, the WWE Champion and should have been able to draw.

Others say he was "the glue that held the company together" (Jim Ross). Either way you look at it, Shawn would still prove why he was the best.

He would wrestle little guys like Owen Hart to even the biggest of guys such as Yokozuna, Diesel, and Vader proving why he deserved to be number one but never having another rival quite like Bret "The Hitman" Hart.

In 1997, their rivalry exploded wide open leading to a match that would sadly be branded to both Shawn and Bret forever. That match would take place in Montreal, Canada on Nov. 9, 1997.

So much happened after that match took place leading to a sad departure by Bret to the rival company WCW. I'm sure I don't need to explain what happened as it was a critical moment in wrestling history.

I wish Bret would have stayed. I wish things would have been different, but I've always believed that things happen for a reason and with Bret out of the picture, it left room for other stars to shine brighter than ever.

Austin, DX, Sid Vicious, The Undertaker...those are just a few that come to mind when you think about the next era in wrestling. Austin and DX were responsible for launching us into what is known as the Attitude Era of wrestling.

It was a no holds barred, take no BS era of wrestling that helped Vince crush his competition after several weeks of being killed in the ratings by WCW.

While stars like Austin and Triple H were constantly in the spotlight, another future star was just spreading his wings.

That guy was Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.

As Rocky Maivia, there was nothing really special about him except his great wrestling ability and smile. He barely stood out as anything special at the time because let's face it. No one liked the "good guy" during the Attitude Era.

A quick change of style, persona, and a heel turn gave Rocky "The Rock" Maivia just the push he needed to get the attention of the WWE fans.

Feuding alongside the The Nation of Domination in the spring of '97 against the most popular faction at the time, Degeneration X, gave The Rock the exposure he needed to connect with the fans.

As a heel he drew massive heat only heightened by his quick tongue and charisma. He used terms such as "jabroni" and "Smackdown hotel" in his speeches that soon became trademarks of the "The Great One".

As a heel, The Rock drew massive heat but like everything during the Attitude Era, being a heel wasn't always a bad thing. The Rock's promos were funny and cutting edge; not your typical good guy, bad guy smacktalk. The Rock's style was unique and referring to himself in the third person made him stand out even more.

Between the years of '97 and '99, The Rock would go on to have exceptional feuds with Triple H of DX for the Intercontinental belt as well as feuding with the likes of Mick Foley and Austin: two of the biggest names in wrestling at the time and of all time.

The Rock's face turn happened when he and Foley came together as a team forming the famous Rock 'n' Sock Connection. The duo were complete opposites in every way possible from personality to style of wrestling.

However, the two worked magic on the screen and drew one of the highest ratings in WWE history for their famous This Is Your Life segment.

From Rock 'n' Sock to winning the Royal Rumble in 2000, The Rock's career would soar to new heights. He would be screwed by Vince McMahon in a Montreal-styled ending at Wrestlemaina 2000 and Triple H would retain his belt.

Screwed or not, by now The Rock was beyond a superstar. He would go on to have classic feuds with Triple H, Austin, The McMahons, and even a few guys from the "Invasion" such as Chris Jericho who, to this day, still brags about defeating The Rock and Stone Cold in the same night to become the first-ever Undisputed Champion.

Many could argue what the high point of The Rock's career was but I am inclined to think that most would agree that his match with Hogan at Mania 18 was the biggest match of his career.

The events leading up to the epic encounter only added to the anticipation of the match. A stare down would take place of epic proportions giving WWE fans a taste of what was to come on the big stage.

And they delivered.

I'm not a big Hogan mark but even I know that The Rock gave him another great match to tap onto his already encyclopedia-like book of career-making matches.

Not that he needed it, but Hogan is Hogan and there will never be another one like him. (I say this now but just look John Cena. I'm saving that argument for a rainy day.) Defeating Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania earned The Rock another title: icon.

The Rock's career had reached its peak and now was the time to aim higher. He would stick around to feud with guys like Angle, Lesnar, and even *gasp* Goldberg.

Pretty soon though Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's WWE career would lead him permanently to Hollywood and the last time he would ever grace a WWE ring was in 2004, returning in 2008 to induct his father and grandfather into the Hall of Fame.

It is now 2009 and we have yet to get Dwayne Johnson to step foot inside a squared circle again. However, someone else has taken his place as an icon among wrestling fans.

No, I'm not talking about John Cena, though I'm sure he's well on his way. I'm talking about the guy whose career was "ended" in 1998 after an epic match against the leader of the Attitude Era. That guy is Shawn Michaels.

Some would argue that he was already an icon before his return in 2002. I certainly think so considering his list of achievements. First ever Grand Slam winner, winner of back to back rumbles and the first guy to ever enter at number one and win.

Intercontinental Champion revolutionizing wrestling in the first ever Ladder Match at Mania 10 and participating in other firsts such as the Hell in a Cell from Bad Blood in 1998. That's quite the list already but things would only get better for the icon.

At SummerSlam 2002, The "Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels made his official return in a non sanctioned match against current World Heavyweight Champion and long time best friend, Triple H. Shawn Michaels pulled out all the stops in that match from diving through tables to elbow drops from 16-foot ladders.

He would go through his fair share of tables and take shots to the back reassuring Vince McMahon that he had what it takes to hang around for a little while longer.

He would get another first by competing in the first-ever Elimination Chamber match at Survivor Series 2002. He would beat out the likes of future rival Chris Jericho and current rival Triple H to capture the World Heavyweight Championship.

Those matches reestablished Michaels as a WWE star but could he do the same on the biggest stage of them all? He would get a chance to prove it against a new "rival" and one of the biggest stars in the WWE at the time.

Chris Jericho was everything Shawn Michaels used to be and didn't have a problem telling the world how much he admired Micheals but was better than him. The feud was build around Jericho's obsession with proving how he'd surpassed Michaels as the greatest of all time.

The two would go on to wrestle one of the greatest matches of all time, stealing the show at Wrestlemania that year. Jericho didn't win the match but he proved that he was more than worthy to be compared to Shawn Michaels as well as helping show the world why Shawn was such a big deal.

And he was.

Following Mania 19, Shawn would have epic matches at every Wrestlemania that some could argue stole the show every year. He'd even end up facing arguably the biggest star in the WWE today at Wrestlemania 23.

Though not his greatest match, it certainly was one of John Cena's establishing him as a future icon in this business.

As for Shawn, one of his biggest matches would take place the following year at Wrestlemania 24 where he would go one on one against his childhood hero, the 16 time World Heavyweight Champion, The "Nature Boy" Ric Flair.

Flair was in the midst of a feud with the McMahons and was told that if he lost one more match he would have to retire. Everyone knew that it was coming.

We just didn't know when or who would end it until the night Flair approached Michaels. I don't know why we knew. We just knew. And it happened.

Wrestlemania 24 had several great matches on the card including a great main event for the World Heavyweight Championship between Edge and The Undertaker, but Wrestlemania 24 will always be known for the emotional match between Michaels and Flair as well as the words, "I'm sorry. And I love you."

And just when we thought Shawn couldn't do it again, he mesmerized us in a match that will go down as one of THE greatest matches of all time. This past Wrestlemania 25 put the two oldest veterans in the business against one another in a match that pitted The Streak vs Mr. Wrestlemania.

With The Undertaker being 16-0 at Wrestlemania many hardly thought Shawn had a chance but the build up to the match left some wondering whether or not the Deadman's days were numbered.

While Shawn didn't win the match, he has reassured that he will not be forgotten. Ever.

And since Wrestlemania, we haven't seen Shawn on television lately. Of course after a month's hiatus it spurred rumors that he was planning on retiring next year. Others say he's not and his status as of right now is that he's just taking some time off to rest. Whatever the case, I'm sure he won't be around forever.

While I wish it were possible, I've been forced to swallow this pill and it's going to be even harder to swallow when he really does say good-bye.

Of course when there's talk of retirement, there's also talk of "the last match". Who will be the one to get "The Heartbreak Kid's" last match? This has been debated and will continue to be debated.

However, until that time comes I believe that my life would be complete if two of the biggest icons to ever grace the WWE ring would come together for one night to compete against each other. By now you should know where I'm getting at.

Shawn Michaels vs. The Rock. Icon vs. Icon.

I believe that this match has the potential to surpass all other wrestling matches ever wrestled in the WWE.

Just thinking about what the two men have done to revolutionize the business alone speaks for itself. Not only that, but both share some professional similarities that would only heighten the anticipation of the match.

For starters, both men just ooze charisma. Shawn Michaels during his prime got a huge pop every time he stepped foot from behind the curtain. The Rock was so popular that he earned the name "The People's Champ."

Both The Rock and Shawn Michaels have a talent for the mic and cutting edge promos. Whenever I think about Shawn's promo in Canada building up to his match against Hogan in 2005, I cannot help but chuckle.

For over 10 minutes he worked the crowd, drawing massive heat. Not everyone could cut a 10-minute promo and keep the crowd interested at home.

The Rock was the same way. Whenever he spoke on the mic, you were sure to get a great laugh.

The first memory that comes to mind is the first "Rock Concert" and various segments that he did with Shane Helms known as "The Hurricane" at the time. Calling him things like "The Hamburgler" always drew laughs from the audience.

And now we move on to in-ring style.

Both The Rock and Shawn have similar styles in the ring making the match hard to actually just call based on in ring ability. Shawn has amazing stamina and endurance, especially for his age now, and so does The Rock.

While Shawn tends to use a series of Flair chops to wear his opponent down in a corner, The Rock uses a series of cocky punches. And let's not forget the kip-up, a move that both are known for doing.

Can you imagine the tension, the excitement in the arena if both men were to kip-up at the same time into a stare down? Just thinking about it gives me chills.

These two men are two of the most charismatic, hard working individuals to ever grace a WWE ring. Both men have contributed greatly to the world of professional wrestling establishing legacies that can never be replicated.

While Shawn and Dwayne both have chosen different paths, I'll never stop hoping for this match. This match would unite generations of wrestling fans and I, Nefatiri, could die a happy woman.

Thanks for reading.

*Note: My sources for stats and match outcomes can be found on the WWE website. Other sources used include wikipedia, "Heartbreak and Triumph: The Shawn Michaels Story", "WWE's Greatest Superstars of the 90's", as well as other various sources. Also, the photo was found on wikipedia. I don't own it and I have no idea who photoshopped it.

Into the Depths of a Stale Raw

NBTT — Tue, 26 May 2009 19:19:14 -0400

Last night was probably one of the worst episodes of Monday Night Raw I've seen in quite sometime. Yes, I said "episode" because that's what it felt like.

It felt like a really bad sitcom that was supposed to be a combination of stand-up comedy and an episode of Seinfield. Let me take a moment and break it down.

You know it's bad when you can barely remember any of the matches on the card. But I think the first hour of Raw consisted of two matches, a sad attempt at stand-up comedy and a decent promo between a "retired" Hall of Famer and the current WWE champion.

We all knew Vince was going to take a few stabs at Stan "Enis" Kroenke but I think it was a big waste of time. The people at the Staples Center seemed to enjoy it but the rest of us at home were cringing at the sight of it.

The jokes fell flat and I think Vince would have been better off having somebody like Big Show throw "Stan" through the announcement table to call it even.

Next we had a Divas match. Or at least I think we had a Divas match. The match was for the WWE Divas championship (wow), one of the most prestigious belts in WWE history.

While I usually can't bear the sight of a Divas match anymore, I was impressed by Kelly Kelly's performance. It would seem she has improved and it was enough to keep me watching, only to be disappointed by the ending. Go figure.

Moving on...

Flair is later seen backstage pumped and ready to call Orton out to the ring. Oh, but wait. Batista seems to think Flair should wait until after he kicks Orton's ass inside a steel cage.

Of course the "Naitch" turns him down so now we have the set up for Flair's in ring promo, which wasn't half bad.

I'll be one of the first to say that I don't mind listening to a riled up Flair. I personally think his mic skills are a lot better than some of the main eventers. *cough* Dave Batista *cough* Jeff Hardy.

Randy Orton usually bores me half to death but I think Flair brought out the best in him. I think that was probably my favorite segment of the night. For the first time since Orton RKOed Stephanie in the ring, I believed he was "The Guy".

And then it happened.

The return of Mr. Kennedy...Kennedy. And man, wasn't that crowd ready to tear the roof down! Not really, but we'll go with that until the reality of an epic fail of a return eats at my brain.

A good match between Kofi Kingston, William Regal, and Matt Hardy took place. By now though the crowd was half dead to the world. Dead crowds can make or break a match even if it is a good one.

I thought all three did well in the match and Kofi winning surprised the hell out of me.

Not that he doesn't deserve a push, but I thought for certain that we would see a Regal/MVP feud. And the fact that Matt Hardy was part of the match and MVP sitting ring side had potential to reawaken an old rivalry. Oh well...

The next hour of Raw...I'm not really sure what happened. I think a pig pucky match between the current GM of Raw and a guy who is experiencing a serious identity crisis was announced.

That happened after a mixed tag match that made as much sense as making everyone a face on Raw.

A plug for the Extreme Rules pay per view was inserted into the show through a conversation between Vikki, Chavo, and Santino.

Apparently they've already given us clues as to how "extreme" they're going to get giving potential matches that included the infamous "Paddle on a Pole" match. How extremely exciting! (This is the point in which the pig pucky match won out.)

Some other stuff happened including a segment with some twins and "Jack" that featured a really bad attempt at "A Few Good Men" before the highly anticipated main event followed.

The most memorable parts of the main event:

1. Kennedy's Mic Check

2. Randy's RKO

Now to sum all of this up somehow with some analysis.

In a two-hour wrestling broadcast, there should be more than four matches. When an actual match is going on, wrestling fans should be on their feet supporting the superstars who scar their bodies just to entertain us.

Sad excuses for women wrestlers should not get bigger pops than returning potential WWE champions and Goldust should never be allowed to wrestle with Hornswoggle and actually win the match.

On a story-driven show, the writers must book or rather 'script' matches that make sense pertaining to whatever ridiculous storyline they've shoved down the superstars' throats.

In the event that nothing makes sense anymore, a superstar should at least aim to put on a botch-free match or promo.

That is all.

Breaking News: TNA, Are You Serious?

NBTT — Sat, 23 May 2009 19:59:48 -0400

Okay. For the record, let me just state that I think Vince McMahon did right by moving his show to LA for this Monday night. After everything that's happened, I don't blame him for choosing to return to LA.

Now to business. According to wrestling-radio.com, TNA is offering all WWE fans with tickets to the former Monday Night Raw at the Pepsi Center a discount if they bring the tickets to their TNA show. In a press release, the president had this to say.

“Some of the biggest pro wrestling fans in the nation are in Colorado,” said TNA Wrestling President Dixie Carter. “It was sad to see the WWE pull out of all their scheduled shows in Colorado recently because of the scheduling conflict with the NBA playoffs.

"I want everyone in Colorado to know that TNA Wrestling is coming and we hope to see you at our first shows ever in your state. For WWE fans that paid for any of these cancelled events, we are offering you $10 off the purchase of tickets to come see us and enjoy the best fan experience in pro wrestling.”

What...the...hell? Are they for real? While some may call it smart, I just call it stupid because I know if the shoe was on the other foot, Jeff Jarrett would have been pissed off too. But then again, Vince is quite the billionaire while others only wish they were.

And who the hell has time to drive to do a show in LA then turn around and go back to Denver? The point of taping two shows in one state is to save time and gas. Who can really blame the guy for staying in LA to tape Smackdown since clearly he was going to stay in Colorado to tape the other shows to begin with?

And "the best fan experience in pro wrestling?" Is he mad? The last segment of last Thursday's TNA made me sick to my stomach. I watched Mick Foley wrestle a card board box. Well, it was a card board cut out of Rocky Balboa but that's not the point.

TNA, I understand you want to get in on some of this free press but I can assure you that you are no more ready to take on a genuine WWE audience than they are ready to pay $60 for your show.

I'll kindly send my ticket back and get a refund so that I can attend a WWE Smackdown in the near future, clearly 10 times the show TNA is, and get on with my merry life.

Two things, TNA:

1. Get the belt off of Foley unless he's going to actually wrestle a real person.

2. Stop hatin'. You know full well if you had the kind of money Vince has you wouldn't set foot in Denver again until you were good and ready.

While I do feel bad for the Denver fans, clearly everyone knows it wasn't Vince's fault he got kicked out. He had the place booked for almost a year in advance. I don't see how that makes him the bad guy.

TNA, try again when you can put on a show to rival Raw, which technically should be a breeze these days.

SOURCES: wrestling-radio.com

Spotlight: Shelton Benjamin and What I Think of Him

NBTT — Thu, 21 May 2009 20:05:02 -0400

The WWE is currently full of rising young talents but the fact of the matter is this: none of them can touch Shelton Benjamin. I'm sure you'll say this is debatable but I say, "No way!" This guy is the best of the best and has the skills to back it up.

Why am I writing about Benjamin? Because I'm tired of seeing people like Dave Batista and John 'Super' Cena getting all of the attention. Sure Cena's a big draw for Vince's PG rated Monday nights, but Shelton Benjamin is the very definition of a good wrestler.

Just look at this kid. Young, talented, and can do just about anything in the ring.

And let's not forget about his performance in the Money in the Bank ladder match every year. The kid has been in all but one of those matches since they started it in 2005 and has never won one. What the...?

Ahem.

And he's usually the guy that puts on the biggest show in the match.

Tsk. Tsk. Vince McMahon.

What else does this kid have to do to prove to you that he has what it takes to wear the gold? Plus-and I'm sure I'll get lip for this but like I care-I think he deserved the briefcase more than a certain CM Punk.

Buried. That's what happened.

Or maybe not buried. We'll just have to examine this for a minute.

The date is May 5, 2005. The current General Manager of Raw is Mr. Eric Bischoff and he has come up with a brilliant idea.

A Gold Rush Tournament to determine the #1 Contender for the World Heavyweight Championship. The match of the night? Shelton Benjamin versus Shawn Michaels.

That. Match. Owned.

Benjamin may have lost the match but he put on one hell of a wrestling match. Cena, Dave, I hope you were watching.

Or maybe you weren't. If you did watch I'm sure you would have learned something. Guess not.

My point is this. Wrestling fans all over the world watched Shelton Benjamin wrestle arguably the best performer in the WWE of all time and gave him a run for his money so why the heck is he still a mid card performer jobbing to random people? (In Vince's defense, it seems that his current feud with John Morrison will put him back in the spotlight a little bit.)

So why is Benjamin, who's been a part of the WWE longer than a Kennedy or a Punk, continuously getting pushed aside? Kennedy... I think eventually, he would have made something of himself had he not been injured.

Accidents happen so I won't down him much. I will say that his wrestling skills are standard at best and he's pretty good on the mic. As for Punk, can someone please tell me why the hell he won the briefcase two years in a row?

Ah yes.

The WWE realized its mistake when they gave Punk such a crappy reign as champion the first time. That's an argument in itself that I don't care to open for discussion right now.

I really hope that Benjamin gets his chance this time. I know he may not have the best mic skills (and that's the only flaw I see) but that can be overlooked. Hell, Jeff Hardy doesn't have the best mic skills but that did not stop him from becoming the WWE Champion.

I'm Nefatiri and that's what I think.

Stan, Stan, Oh, Stan. And So Ends the "Denver Debacle"

NBTT — Wed, 20 May 2009 20:37:31 -0400

And so it ends. The great "Debacle" between Vince McMahon and Stan Kroenke has officially been settled.

Word has spread that Vince McMahon's show will be taped from the Staples Center in LA and not at the pre-booked Pepsi Center in Denver.

If you did not see Vince's response on Sportscenter, check it out.

My thoughts?

I think Stan's an idiot. That's right. I said it. He's an idiot. Plain and simple.

Who throws billionaire Vince McMahon out of a building? Only someone who doesn't want his business ever again. And you know what? I wouldn't be surprised if Vince decided not to ever grace Denver with his presence again.

Not to mention all the money Denver would make if Vince decided to host a 'Wrestlemania' there someday. Hmmm...maybe out of Stan's reach now.

How much trouble would it have been, really, to just play the game a day later? I can't think if a single argument to justify Stan not doing this, but I do stand by the decision to keep Game 4 in Denver. Call me a hypocrite but there's nothing like home court advantage.

So what now? A bunch of pissed off wrestling fans who purchased tickets months ago only to find that they have to send them back for refunds? Shame on you, Stan.

Now these angry wrestling fans will have to watch an epic Monday Night Raw from the stadium of their current rivals. Pretty sure they won't be happy about that.

I personally would love to see Vince and his wrestling fans storm the arena during half time to tell Stan that they've got two words for him. Meh. But that's just me.

Such a shame it had to end this way but I'm sure LA fans aren't complaining. But there is a lesson to be learned from this.

Denver wrestling fans should move to LA.