10 NFL Players You'd Want to Bring Home for the Holidays
'Tis the season to be jolly—and imagine how fun it would be if National Football League players were invited to your family’s holiday celebrations this season.
We, the good folks at Bleacher Report, believe in the power of playing “What if?”
Thus, the purpose for this article.
Forget bringing players to school or riding the bus with mascots and owners, this article is all about bringing your favorite NFL players to the dinner table.
Who would fit what roles and how would they fare?
There’s only one way to find out.
Here are the top 10 NFLers you’d love to bring over to celebrate the season:
Hannah Foslien/Getty Images
After all, isn't he the reason for the season?
The most religious man in the entire league has to headline this list.
It's a natural fit. There's no debating it.
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Should your family need an emergency Santa Claus, this Steelers defensive end just needs a quick application of beard dye.
And you thought that beard made him look funny. Psh.
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He's not quite an NFL player yet, but this future Colt would be a smart decision to bring to the Christmas party.
After all, this man's school mascot is a tree. It's like having a hybrid Christmas tree—not quite real, not fully fake.
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Naturally, every tree deserves a star upon it to shine bright for all to see.
Super Bowl champion. This season's MVP.
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It's always better to give at the holiday season than it is to receive.
Not many NFL quarterbacks are better at "giving gifts" than Kansas City's newest superstar, Tyler Palko.
Six interceptions in his first two weeks? Only touchdown of the season coming on a Hail Mary?
His interceptions might as well come wrapped with bows.
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The total opposite argument can be made for the best kick and punt returner in NFL history.
Devin Hester would be fun to sit next to under the tree.
When your aunt gives you that disgustingly ugly sweater or your brother gives you that gift he thought was funny, Hester would be the ideal man to return them and quickly.
Peyton Manning and Eli Manning
Perhaps no NFL players could amuse and entertain the family quite like the Manning brothers, Eli and Peyton.
They've done commercials together. They demand media attention because of their family history. They're dynamic when it comes to licking Oreo cookies.
The Manning brothers are obvious choices to share a glass of eggnog with this December.
Any Dallas Cowboy
This could pertain to Cowboys owner Jerry Jones as well.
The only NFL stadium that gives publicity to the Salvation Army by hosting a giant red kettle is the Cowboys Stadium.
After dinner when it's times to exchange Girl Scout cookie and candy fundraising forms, any Cowboy with access to the kettle will ensure that part of the proceeds go to charity.
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My argument for Michael Vick's attendance: If wrangling dogs in your basement is a cinch, how hard can it be to watch some reindeer?
Every family has that one, odd cousin that everyone tolerates but no one looks forward to the return of.
Brett Favre, folks.
Brett Lyons is a featured columnist for Bleacher Report. Unless otherwise noted, all quotes were obtained firsthand or from official interview materials.
Follow Brett Lyons on Twitter @BrettLyons670.