Tips For Being a Manchester City Footballer

I found this on the "King of the Kippax" blog.  Had to post it here as it is simply brilliant!

1. City are always notoriously slow starting up, so try and imagine that the game has been playing for some twenty minutes when you kick off, this will mean that you are not 0-2 down by the time you get into gear.

2. Whatever you all may think, with the exception of Robinho and possibly SWP, you are NOT a group of Galacticos who always steam roller the opposition, so do NOT fanny around pretending you are by attempting to play a superior passing game. We all know that you haven't a clue and the opposition will soon sus you out too.

3. Try getting stuck in to the opposition for a change. The WBA players will be playing out of their skins for survival, try and remember that you are too.

4. Avoid going a goal down in the opening 10 minutes (see point one).

5. Do not play the ball into the direction of Richard Dunne's right foot as he is prone to making silly mistakes or scoring an own goal with it.

6. Do not play the ball into the direction of Richard Dunne's left foot as he is prone to making silly mistakes or scoring an own goal with it.

7. Avoid playing the ball in the air near Richard Dunne's head as he is prone to making silly mistakes or scoring an own goal with it.

You're currently logged into Facebook

Do you want to share your Bleacher Report activity on Facebook?