"Someone once said that the most important thing was not to look like a geek. Do you have any idea how geeky all this is?"—Daria Morgendorfer
In a couple of my articles from recent weeks I explored the flashier side of the WWE. The attires and entrances that captivated the WWE Universe for multiple reasons.
This week we will switch gears a little into the worst outfits from wrestling history. Infamous for being poorly put together, or just plain awful looking.
So read on my friends, and wonder with me, "What were they thinking?"
These individuals make the honorable mentions slide because it is in the collective consciousness of ALL wrestling fans that these characters were simply ridiculous:
The Gobbledy Gooker
Now, I don't really have a problem with Cena's look per se, but it's pretty bad as wrestling gear. When you make fun of the "jorts" you have on, that's a problem.
Sheamus is a big menacing guy...let's have him win King of the Ring and then drape a big green piece of felt over him!
I think apart from Booker T trying to speak with an English accent, unless you're Jerry Lawler, you won't be able to pull off a crown very well...
Three guys in matching cargo pants at the height of the boy band era to capitalize on that craze's popularity? Check.
Too Cool was a lot of things, and cool was not one of them. Hip-hop gimmicks can work well (see John Cena's Doctor of Thuganomics, Cryme Tyme), but when you dress up two guys to look like hip-hop stereotypes, it doesn't work.
WCW was really good at trying to cash in on the popularity of someone else idea, weren't they?
Yup. They sure were.
The 1999 debut of Chris Jericho in the WWE was one of the best moments in wrestling history. So why the hell did he come out looking like Pebbles from the Flintstones?
Hm...Gregory Helms was a pretty successful cruiserweight in WCW...since he's no stranger to crappy gimmicks (see Three Count), let's put him in a superhero outfit to bury him! Then let's give him a big guy with no personality and have him wear a similar outfit! Yeah! Then let's put Molly Holly in ANOTHER similar outfit!
Isn't WWE creative great?
Here we are again at another WCW attempt to cash in on another property. With WCW hemorrhaging money like crazy, they paid KISS to perform at an event, and this short lived gimmick was what spawned from it.
I admit, the large shears were pretty cool, but what is going on with those pants?
The man who would become The Rock kinda had a rough start. Not only did the fans not buy his blue, chipper, good guy demeanor, he started out with a horrible haircut and...whatever those tassels were supposed to be...
Isn't it cute when horrible gay stereotypes dress alike?
Huh. Looks like this might have been the brainchild for The Hurricane.
Throwback 70's clothes and an Elvis-esque haircut. We have a winner.
Is it just me, or is he someone who looks like he smells bad? With the pig slop and the farmer look in general...just sayin'...
Yet another WWE Superstar who had a bit of a rough patch. The man who would become Kane had to wear a dentist outfit...man old school WWE characters were really cartoony weren't they?
Bright. Orange. Singlet. I think that's all that needs to be said.
I wonder how much material they needed to make those pajamas...
I'm sure no one would have minded if someone like Shawn Michaels or John Morrison did something like this, but Mideon was not the best guy in the world to look at...
WWE, making your childhood nightmares come true since 1992.
That mask he wore always freaked me out when I was a kid. Looking at it now, it really doesn't serve a purpose. Speaking of masks...
In another attempt to bury CM Punk, after losing his hair via a match stipulation WWE decided to have him wear something akin to a gimp mask to the ring. One of the worst attire choices ever.
Not so much now, but those half pants or whatever you'd call them he used to wear both confused and infuriated me.
Thanks again for reading guys! If you have any others I may have left out feel free to add them in the comments section and I'll post em on this slide if the case is good!
Until next time, I'm Merlot Williams, and that's my opinion.
The Spirit Squad - Thank you to Kevin Berge for the suggestion!
The Red Rooster - Thank you to Kevin Berge for the suggestion!
The Boogeyman - Thank you to Kevin Berge for the suggestion!
King Harley Race - Thank you to Kevin Sherman for the suggestion!
Greg Gagne's Rambo outfit - Thank you to Kevin Sherman for the suggestion!
That 70's Guy - Thank you to Kevin Sherman for the suggestion!
The Mean Street Posse - Thank you to Alex Smith for the suggestion!