Tis' the season to be jolly; The UFC is giving us three events this December, two of which are on free on spike. So in honor of this giving season I am putting together a list of 30 gifts for 30 fighters in the UFC. Just in case some of you want to surprise your favorite fighter on Christmas.
Brock Lesnar: Bright Yellow Rain Poncho
This gift would allow people to, "See Him Now!" If they still don't after he wears the poncho, they are clearly in denial.
Randy Couture: Acting Classes For One Year
He needs something to do after his time in the octagon is over. If you've seen "The Scorpion King 2." You'd know why this is the perfect gift.
Antonio Rodrigo Nogueria: A Typewriter
An old school typewriter would make it easy for him to write an auto-biography. He's had a crazy life, and I want to read about it!
Frank Mir: A Lifetime Supply Of Hair Gel
This guy cares more about his hair than training his team. He probably spends thousands of dollars on hair gel per year, this would surely help him out.
Forrest Griffin: A Natural Loofa
Yes, a loofa, it's been proven to help toughen skin. We all know Forrest bleeds a lot, maybe he can prevent that by toughening his skin.
Rashad Evans: A Chuck Liddell Poster
For motivational purposes, he has six decision victories, most by split decision. He needs this poster to stay motivated to knock people out, to remember how it feels.
Quinton "Rampage" Jackson: Money
I know he has money already, but with all those kids and lawyer fees, he's gonna need some extra help.
Wanderli Silva: A Baby Name Book
I hope he gets this before he has any more kids. His son's name is Thor, I don't even wanna know what his daughter's name is.
Chuck Liddell: An Air Hockey Table
It's said that an air hockey table can help improve you reflexes. With Chuck's deteriorating he could really use this.
Tito Ortiz: A Parenting Book
When expecting twins you never know what to expect. This would help him out a great deal.
Lyoto Machida: Five Hour Energy Shots For Life
He's too damn calm, he needs to be more energetic to win over fans. This would help him, maybe then we'd seen the Lyoto Machida that ko'd Rich Franklin.
Anderson Silva: English As A Second Language Classes
He needs to learn English to do interviews alone, and maybe he'd be more popular. He's been a star for three years now, it's about time.
Patrick Cote: A Four Leaf Clover
With any luck at all he'll be back in seven months, and possibly a fight away from a title shot. He'll need the clover for any of that to come true.
Yushin Okami: Kathy Keeton's Book (Longevity)
It helps you to improve bone density. After all he did break his hand and lose out on a title shot, this will help to prevent that from happening again.
Rich Franklin: A Life Sized Anderson Silva Figure
15 comments Last one added 7 months ago — Leave a Comment
Uncle-Joe S 7 months ago
Good stuff man, I got a good laugh out of this one (not that I even needed it so much after watching the NFL today). I have one to add for Joe Rogan; a hot cup of tea, something has got to help that voice.
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Sean Schimling 7 months ago
LOL good idea, man im stuck at work all day, i can't watch the NFL...I guess i'll have to wait for sportscenter
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Uncle-Joe S 7 months ago
Don't bother, the whole league has gone to hell. Best part of the day was Polamalu laying out Welker.
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Sean Schimling 7 months ago
NICE!!! Who won? Pats or Steelers?
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Uncle-Joe S 7 months ago
Steelers, I got that and most of my other picks wrong this week.
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Sean Schimling 7 months ago
That sucks, Did Hines Ward do anything? I got him on my fantasy team.
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Uncle-Joe S 7 months ago
I'm not sure, I didn't see a lot of that game.
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Joseph Lupoli 7 months ago
For Joe Rogan: a thorax transplant.
For Dana White: a pink slip. (Both kinds)
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Dorothy Willis 7 months ago
For Rogan a Roget's Thesarus. Patrick Cote--an authentic PIMP cane like Shonie Carter's. Anderson Silva--Taz jammies and a robe to match his slippers. GSP--Dolce & Gabbana thongs. Matt Serra--a little gi for his baby (due in the spring). Dana needs a dictionary to increase his f'n vocabulary to include more words consisting of more than four letters and begin with letters other than "F" or "M." A secretary or ghost writer to help Nog write that book, typing is way to slow and I want to read it in my lifetime. Roger Huerta--the UFC contract he was wishing for before the Florian fight. Florian --a case in which to put his future new LW belt. BJ Penn--a 2009 UFC callendar with fights scheduled every four months from January 31 on.
Love this creative article; wish I had thought of it first, you clever rascal you! ***** and POTD!!!
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Sean Schimling 7 months ago
GSP--Dolce & Gabbana thongs??? Dorthy, get your mind out of the gutter! LOL, thanks for the POTD...
I love the dictionary for Dana White, he F'n can't F'n make a Mother F'n comment without usin the F'n F word.
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Joseph Lupoli 7 months ago
If Big Nog is willing to sign a lawyer's contract, I'll ghostwrite his book.
I'm already ghostwriting a book for some one. As soon as it's done, I'll ship an e-mail to Big Nog.
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CJ Daconta 7 months ago
Thaigo Alves should get an Xbox 360, then he could play gears of war 2!
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Sean Schimling 7 months ago
LOL, I have a PS3 myself, so I'm a little bias. But Gears Of War 2 looks sick. He could always play Dead Space,Fallout 3,Resistance 2, and LittleBigPlanet for PS3!
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Jon Grilz 7 months ago
The KenFlo and BJ Penn comments were pretty good.
I know it was a joke and all, but Sherk got his nickname when he was fighting over in Japan.
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Joseph Bonsignore 7 months ago
Indeed he did. The Japanese katakana for Sherk is the same for shark. As for the muscle, well look at him.
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