Tom Brady seems to have jumped into hot water with one of his patented witticisms.

Giving a locker-side interview, the star QB suggested that Patriots fans should come to the 4:15 p.m. ET Sunday game with the San Diego Chargers in a state of rowdiness, after consuming a few aperitifs.

Almost immediately, the sober-sided fan police charged Tom with disorderly conduct, inciting a riot and telling bad jokes.

Brady, whose car was hit last season on the way to practice by a negligent driver, is hardly likely to be an advocate for irresponsible drinking. He is captain of the Patriots, not Captain Morgan.

What the brouhaha indicates is that celebrity status means you can only do stand-up comedy when the audience is not filled with members of the humorless media.

As anyone with a sense of joking about sports can tell you, fans never laugh when it comes to supporting their home teams. We have personal information from writing humor sports pieces that the laugh you create incites violence in a dozen people who read it.

Tom should leave the light-hearted comments to the professionals who know how to deal with both hecklers and tacklers.

As Deion Branch once noted, Tom Brady thinks he’s funny when he’s not playing Jack the Ripper on the field. 

As Tom’s best friend Wes Welker can attest, you have to be careful with your words during a press conference, lest you put your silver foot in your tin-cup mouth.

It’s hard to eat your own words, and so the Patriots issued a clarification for Tom’s joke, saying the QB with the silver tonsils referred to whetting his whistle, not sloshing down booze in his remarks.

Oh, please, let Tom Brady be as mercilessly funny as Groucho Marx. He plans to shoot a Charger in his pajamas on Sunday. How he got into Tom’s UGG pajamas is anyone’s guess.

We lift our grog to you, dear Tom. Bottoms up!