It is nearly impossible to listen to this song without cracking at least a smile. Goldfinger muses, “I wonder what it would be like/ To have sex with the league's leading scorer.” The song continues, “Ah, it'll never happen, it's just a pipe dream/ Wait a minute -- I'm not even gay, I'm married!/ Pssh, whatever.”
Many express love and obsession with their favorite sport; Goldfinger takes it to a whole new (and delightfully humorous) level.
Tiger Woods, golfer
“The flow’s insane and the stroke is crazy
I stroke so good, like Tiger Woods
Then I ROAR like a Tiger would”
"Get Buck" Akon feat. Ludacris
Despite the sexual connotation these lyrics hold, I doubt Tiger would be too offended by the reference to his golf prowess on the green. With such an unusual name, it’s surprising there aren’t more songs or parodies based on the phenomenal golfer. Then again, if my real name was Eldrick, I’d think of using catchy, ferocious nicknames too..
Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers shooting guard
“Could you get me out of jail?
(Shawty im a rapper man. I am not a basketball player)
Could you get me out of jail?
(Man this some bullsh*t, man this some Kobe Bryant sh*t.)
Could you get me out of jail?
(Man she came here willingly.)”
"Get Me Out of Jail" Petey Pablo
This is the song that inspired the column. Petey Pablo has a clever sense of humor in this song, as he sings about different ways he landed himself in jail. He pokes fun at himself, as well as the past Kobe Bryant scandal.
He references the basketball player more quietly in between the chorus lines, in order to defend himself against getting arrested for his relations with a lady friend. The whole song is tongue in cheek, yet Kobe would probably not be proud of being included in these particular lyrics.
Magic Johnson, retired Los Angeles Lakers point guard
“Kareem Abdul Jabbar
All time great super super star
I hate to burst your bubble but triple double trouble
Is coming to your town and he's going to make rubble
Does anybody want some Magic Johnson
L. A. Lakers fast break makers
Kings of the court shake and bake all takers
Back to back is a bad ass fact a claim that remains intact”
"Magic Johnson" – Red Hot Chili Peppers
Though it’s hard to determine the lyrics simply by listening to the song, the Red Hot Chili Peppers do an excellent job composing admiring, cleverly written lyrics about the legendary Magic Johnson.
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