Fakes. Frauds. Imposters.

I can think of a few other things to call the Winnipeg Blue Bombers this morning, and none of them would be complimentary.

I mean, when you soil the sheets as badly as the Swaggerville 12 did in a 45-23 homefield spanking at the hands of the rejuvenated Saskatchewan Roughriders on the Sabbath, you don't put lipstick on a pig and hope no one will notice that it's still a pig.

You tell it like it is.

And it's like this: Not since the days of crazy Professor Mike Kelly, when the Bombers were an off-field circus and an on-field nightmare, has the Winnipeg football club performed this poorly. Even while conspiring to lose 14 games last season, they at least looked like they had a bit of a clue most of the time.

But against the 'Riders...where does one begin?

Let's start with the quarterback, Buck Pierce, who looked dazed and confused and kept tossing the ball to the guys in green-and-white linen. Five times his deliveries landed at the wrong address. Yup, five interceptions. Until Sunday, he'd never tossed that many picks in a game at any level of football.

I doubt very much that his agent will be approaching the Bombers about a new contract for his client today.

Having said that, the buck doesn't stop at Pierce.

His offensive line provided him with about as much protection as Abe Lincoln had in the theatre. The 'Riders rag-dolled Pierce and one hit in particular, by Saskatchewan safety Craig Butler in the first quarter, was such an earth-trembler that his kinfolk in California likely felt it. Pierce's lid flew further than some of his passes. But at least it wasn't intercepted.

Meanwhile, it's about the defence, aka Swaggerville. Still having fun, boys? Still flapping your gums?

Until the Labor Day weekend, people had been tossing compliments at the Bombers defensive dozen like confetti at a wedding. They were a bunch of riotous, ransacking rogues who walked as good as they talked, and they were the main reason the Bombers rang up seven Ws in their first eight assignments this Canadian Football League season.

But against the 'Riders...ugly. The secondary had more leaks than the people at Wiki. It's hard to believe the Bombers actually led the game 10-0 at one point.

It's also fair and appropriate to bring the Bombers' character into question this morning. It's one thing to lose a football game in Regina, but it's quite another to be humiliated in your own bailiwick by the same outfit eight days later.

Quality teams don't let that happen.

I direct your attention to the Calgary Stampeders and Montreal Alouettes. Both were thumped in the front end of their home-and-away twinbills with the Edmonton Eskimos and Hamilton Tiger-Cats, respectively. Then the Stampeders marched into Commonwealth Stadium and rapped the Esks' knuckles. The Als, meanwhile, licked their wounds then laid a good and proper licking on the Tabbies.

The Bombers, on the other hand, caved in the back end of their two-game showdown with the 'Riders, who had been 1-7. They caved badly. On both sides of the football and on special teams.

All of which tells me their 7-1 record was fraudulent. Yeah, they still sit atop the CFL tables, with a 7-3 log, but they are the Winnipeg Bogus Bombers.