NFL Picks: Week Twelve
Now, why on earth would I pull a T-Murph picture off of Facebook and post it on this weeks picks column? Simply, to make a point. That point being that I was better off starting Terrence Murphy than I was Lee Evans this week.
I'm still quite pissed off about the fantasy week that was week eleven. Throughout the entire picks column last week, I agonized between starting Wes Welker or Lee Evans. I ultimately picked Lee Evans because of my ill-advised "Always start people that play on Monday night" rule.
The difference? Lee Evans had one pass thrown his way the entire night. Wes Welker had seven catches for more than 100 yards, and had I started him I would have won the week by one point.
The real tragedy? That I sat through an entire Bills/Browns game on Monday night.
1 points - Jacksonville over Minnesota
It's the Paper Champions Super Bowl this week as two teams that are always projected to be good meet up in week twelve. Winner gets to be projected as the real Super Bowl champions for next season, loser moves to L.A.
2 points - San Diego over Indianapolis
Speaking of Paper Champions, no matter how hard I try, I just can't pick against the Chargers. They have basically no shot of making the playoffs anymore, and the Colts are finally playing like the Colts, so I'm not sure why I'm going with the Chargers in this one. As you can see, it's this lack of reason why my picks column is regarded as one of the least accurate projection columns in all of sports.
3 points - Green Bay over New Orleans
I was going to write a mini-Packers preview here, but then I heard my dad sing this, to the tune of Red Hot Chili Peppers "Under the Bridge", and I thought it was funnier:
I'm stuck in this house....
I can't go nowhere.
Got nothing to do....
Except dry my hair.
These are the experiences you have when you are a 24 year old living with your parents.
Speaking of being 24, I just took a survey today for an advertising agency, and the final question was, "What age group are you in?" Well, just like I've been doing for the last six years, I clicked the button next to "18-24". But soon, I'll have to be clicking "25-34".
New goal: Move out of parents house before I have to click "25-34".
4 points - Tennessee over New York Jets
There is this girl I work with (you don't know how good it is to say that again) and her boyfriend is driving to Nashville to go to the Jets game this weekend, to see Favre. Look, if you want to be one of those d-bags that buys a Favre Jets jersey, then fine. But to picking driving to Nashville for a Jets game instead of a Packers game when they both play at Tennessee in the same season just lacks any sense of reason.
And in hindsight, why did Ted Thompson have to trade Favre to a team whose nickname rhymes with Brett. Does anyone even call them the Jets anymore, or have we all settled on New York Bretts?
I hate that I hate you, Brett Favre.
5 points - Atlanta over Carolina
If you didn't see this link at the bottom of this week's Winks Thinks, I have to share it with you again. Why wasn't this column posted a day earlier to ensure more people would read it? I was too busy watching this:
6 points - Philadelphia over Baltimore
"Rules are overrated. What we have here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback knows the rules of the game - black coaches and black quarterbacks knowing the rules about ties."
- Donovan McNabb quoting his inner Rush Limbaugh
Seriously though, McNabb legitimately has to be the most overrated quarterback of all-time, besides maybe Johnny Unitas (Have you ever seen him play? No? Me neither. So why do we always mention his name when we're talking about the top quarterbacks of all time?) Warren Sapp said it best when he said McNabb's NFL legacy will be puking in the Super Bowl, Rush Limbaugh, and not knowing about ties.
There was a time when McNabb used to be one of my favorite quarterbacks. I had a mini-McNabb bobblehead and jersey t-shirt. I collected McNabb football cards.
Then I realized he sucked and I burned those things.
7 points - Cleveland over Houston
Right now my Google Analytics says I only had 26 visitors come to The Bucky Channel today, and it's 10:07 pm. If that number is correct, I'm probably going to quit this blog.
8 points - Buffalo over Kansas City
I don't think it's fair to Bills fans to compare their missed field goal against the Browns last week to the field goal Scott Norwood missed to cost them the Super Bowl. This is a team that is three years away from Toronto, can't we cut them some slack?
9 points - Denver over Oakland
See? I told you couldn't watch that Tears For Fears knock-off video more than once. This one's not bad either, a new version of A-ha's "Take On Me".
I mean, that's better than a write up about the Broncos and Raiders, right?
10 points - Washington over Seattle
There are some teams that I don't really care for, but I like when they are good. The Washington Redskins are one of those teams. So is Notre Dame. I hate Notre Dame, but I think it's better for college football when they are good, just like it's better when Duke is good for college hoops, and the Yankees are good in a baseball.
The Seahawks, however, are a team I wish didn't exist.
11 points - Dallas over San Francisco
Terrell Owens during his interview with Deion Sanders on the NFL Network:
That shirt looks awfully similar to the former logo of the Philadelphia Eagles, doesn't it?
12 points - Chicago over St. Louis
I don't know if this is a game that deserves 12 points, but I'm at least 100 points back in this pick 'em league of mine, so I might as well take a few chances. Although this isn't really that much of a risk.
I mean, how are the Rams this bad? I know their defense sucks, but isn't their offense still pretty similar to the Greatest Show on Turf? I guess I am just overrating guys like Torry Holt, Steven Jackson (when he plays), and Marc Bulger. Here's a question. How much better is this team with Kurt Warner under center? Any? Much? Something to ponder.
13 points - New York Giants over Arizona
The Cardinals may have already wrapped up their division, but I'm pretty sure the Giants have already wrapped up the Super Bowl.
14 points - New England over Miami
You know, I'm not all that sure about this game, either.
Earlier I had said I used to be a pretty big Donovan McNabb guy, and I have to also admit that I used to be a fan of the Patriots. I proudly wore a Drew Bledsoe jersey in 1996, but that was before they would end up meeting the Pack in the Super Bowl.
What's harder to admit is that I liked New England for one of the worst reasons ever, a reason that no true fan should ever use to justify themselves. Yes, I like New England because I liked their colors.
After they switched from Pat the Patriot to "Flying Elvis", I just thought that was the coolest things. Although the jerseys they wore in the mid-90's look hideous now compared to their current kits.
When they won the Super Bowl against the Rams after the 2001 season, I was genuinely excited. Then they won another one, and another one, and kept winning. That got really annoying.
You know what else got annoying? Boston.
15 points - Tampa Bay over Detroit
Despite the joke of the franchise that is the Lions, I still think one of the Thanksgiving Day games should always be played in Detroit. As well as Dallas, of course. I'm still not sure how I feel about the new third Thanksgiving Day game. It rotates, it lacks tradition, and it's on the NFL Network. Even though I've always had a cable system which carried NFL Network, it still kind of cheapens the day.
16 points - Pittsburgh over Cincinnati
Always good to start the week off right.
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