What The Hell? Evander Holyfield Edition

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What The Hell? Evander Holyfield Edition
You have to be kidding me!  Valuev/Holyfield and Klitschko/Rahman? You must be bat crap crazy to have ever even pictured these fights happening!  I must be in a nightmare because there is no way that these fights would ever fill a high school gym, let alone an actual venue.  Please wake me up!  Why have the boxing gods forsaken me!

Let me break this down for you and explain why these two fights are the worst matchups possible in the heavyweight division at this time:

Valuev/Holyfield: May the gods strike down the dumbass that made this fight happen.  Valuev, the monstrosity that awoke after a glacier in northern Russia melted, has never actually beaten a decent opponent (and don’t you DARE say Ruiz). 

And Holyfield, the man who walked with Moses, is seriously one punch away from being in a wheel chair.  I am guessing Valuev wants to beat him so he can have a “Marquee” name on his list of wins, but how much value does his name actually have anymore?  None, if you ask me, and when he loses, and he will, it just makes it worth less. 

If anything, Valuev should be facing someone like, oh let’s say, David Haye.  That’s right, I said it!  I think someone needs to knock that cocky brit out and send him back to cruiser weight!

Klitschko/Rahman: Klitschko is probably wishing Alexander Povetkin didn’t have to back out of the fight.  If Klitschko was fighting Povetkin, at least people would watch it.  So they pick Rahman as his replacement?  Why the hell is Rahman getting another shot at a title?  How many times can this guy get title shots for beating Lenox Lewis eight years ago! COME ON PEOPLE! 

This is almost as sad as aforementioned fight.  The only difference is Rahman isn’t slurring his words like a wino after a case of Kettle One, and Klitschko, at least to my knowledge, isn’t a descendent of a line of mammoth men who once ruled the earth.

All sarcasm aside, this is not good for the sport of boxing, but thankfully The Valuev / Holyfield fight will not be televised in the US, which is fine with me.  The other night, I was watching ESPN Classic and they were replaying Holyfield/Bowe II and it was awesome to see Evander back in his prime. 

But gone are the days of being able to take punches and even speak without sounding like a stroke victim.  Please Real Deal; hang them up, so we can at the very least keep those memories of who you used to be.

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