Puzzle Pieces: Adventures in Student Journalism

"UF doesn’t play road games anymore. Each game seems to be a traveling show that’s a cross between a pep rally and a party as the Gators make their way to the raves that will take place later in Atlanta and Miami."

Oh, mercy. It’s like a five-game stretch in which UF has played two games on the road in cities more than 600 miles from Gainesville, one game at a neutral site with exactly half of the fans cheering for the other team, and two games in the Swamp somehow turned into Carnival.

Look, the knock on Florida in recent years when it’s come to national consideration during bowl season is the fanbase’s apathy towards traveling. That’s why Florida’s only been west of the Mississippi for a bowl twice since Steve Spurrier took over, traveling to Arizona for a national championship game on both occasions.

There are SEC schools that travel in droves. Florida is not one of them, unless there’s evidence of exodus from Gainesville that Hyppolite can see on the road. (And he does travel to road games, while I don’t).

It’s more plausible to believe the Orange and Blue’s hues have outnumbered the colors of depressed fan bases in Fayetteville and Nashville on their true road trips, and Gainesville’s proximity to Jacksonville fueled a great Gator turnout for the Florida-Georgia game.

Also, “raves” is probably not how I would describe UF tailgates.

"And you know no one parties like the folks in Atlanta and Miami."

I went to a Jay-Z concert in Miami. I’ve never been to Atlanta. But I’d wager that the denizens of New Orleans would take issue with this statement.

"After the past five games, which have looked more like matchups between the Harlem Globetrotters and the Washington Generals, I’m ready to say the Gators are the best team in the country.

"No team can match UF’s combination of flash (Percy Harvin, Chris Rainey, and Jeff Demps), toughness (Brandon Spikes), and swagger (the whole team)."

It’s true, the Gators have looked quite good, and perhaps good enough to be mentioned in the discussion with the behemoths of the Big 12. But the tired Globetrotters/Generals analogy? It’s like Hyppolite lives in a world where college students would appreciate that reference instead of a Seth Petruzelli/Kimbo Slice allusion.

Oh, and flash, toughness, and swagger are not quantifiable football statistics. The New England Patriots have those things, the USC Trojans have those things, and the Dillon Panthers have those things. Two of those teams have lost in part because of swagger, and the third is fictional.

Perhaps tabbing the offense’s potency and nodding to defensive tenacity, and then backing up both with stats, would be a better idea.

"They’ve made every phase of the game worth watching. I’m used to ignoring punts, but you can’t with Brandon James returning them for touchdowns or Demps racing past everyone and blocking the kick."

At the end of the day, we’re still watching punts. We lose. (Oh, and Carlos Dunlap had both of the blocks on Saturday.)

"It’s not that the Gators are blowing teams out. College football teams have been running up the score for decades. It’s the way it’s being done.

"UF is outplaying opponents in every phase of the game. What’s a team to do if you can’t stop the other guys from scoring, can’t score yourself, and can’t even get a punt away to at least make the Gators break a sweat on their way to the end zone?"

Capitalize on turnovers and blown coverages by a young secondary and win late thanks to a crucial special teams play? (Wait, this happened? This year?)

"The answer is not much. I’m at the point where I think only Texas Tech and Texas can possibly take down UF."

Good to know, considering UF will not be playing either until a potential national championship game. I suppose we’ll have to wait until after the Gators beat the consensus top team in the country in the SEC Championship to see a real challenge.

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