Brooks Upset Over Devious Tennesseans

Kentucky Head Football coach isn’t a huge fan of those folks down south of the border. No, as far as I know, Rich Brooks hasn’t taken up border patrolling as a hobby, but he is pretty ticked off at the coaching staffs of two Tennessee football teams.

Brooks is accusing the Middle Tennessee State University staff of stealing Kentucky’s play calling signals. “They were either getting them from the field or the press box,” Brooks said of MTSU. “They might have gotten some help from Tennessee. Tennessee had them last year.”

     He is referring to last year’s 4-overtime thriller that Kentucky lost 52-50 to the Vols where the Wildcat coaching staff had to create a towel barricade around the signal callers to keep they’re calls hidden from prying eyes. Insinuating that Tennessee may have helped out the Blue Raiders (Fantastical & Magical Blue Flying Homoerotic Horses) of MTSU is definitely a possibility. But really? Did you not change your hand signals after Tennessee apparently figured them out? Are you athletes on par with the lowly Blue Raiders’ players? You should be fairly successful even if you told their coach exactly what you were going to do every play. Maybe that’s a little extreme, but do you get the point? Kentucky has a bigger problem than signal stealing. No more excuses, former Central High School standout Lones Seiber had the worst game kicking the ball, missing four FG’s, since Oregon State’s Alexis Serna missed three extra points in a 21-22 loss to LSU in 2004. Your receiving corps is comprised of Dickie Lyons and eight other former high school backups.

 

At least basketball season is almost here…

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Auburn and MSU Team Up to Create SEC History

If you were watching football Saturday and from the corner of your periphery you saw Auburn -3  Miss St -2 scroll across the bottom of your screen,  it’s likely you thought to yourself, “Strange, I didn’t know it was college baseball season already.” Nor do you need to run to Lens Crafters to get a free eye-exam. No, the only illusions here are that Auburn’s new spread offense is as exciting as previously advertised. The War Eagle D was stellar in shutting out an overmatched Bulldog offense, but they didn’t get anything to show for it, due to the offense’s overwhelming ineptitude the move the ball, and giving MSU its only points by way of a safety.

This offensive explosion went down in the books as the SEC’s first conference matchup to finish 3-2. The last time this happened at all in major college football is believed to be a Clemson win over Duke on Oct. 16, 1965. Preliminary research says that it is only the 7th time in college football this score has occurred.

 

We’ll see if Auburn can ride this wave of record-breaking momentum into their primetime clash with #6 LSU this weekend at Jordan-Hare Stadium.

 

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Expectations Shouldn’t Be Very High for Petrino, Hogs

 

When you look at Bobby Petrino, don’t you just kind of feel a little bad for him. Not that bad because he’s making millions of dollars, but you know he still wants to win. Unfortunately for him, we all know that Arkansas is a black hole that pulls in and crushes any hopes of winning championships. Some how Lou Holtz figured out so sort of scheme to avoid such a fate, and if Bobby P. can see through the lisps and spitting and somehow comprehend Holtz’s blathering, maybe… just maybe there is a way…

 

Not likely.

 

Arkansas is one of the worst in the country as far as recruiting thugs and players of the “Sans Reading Ability” variety. Why does nobody care? Because everyone knows they are not a threat to win anything. The Razorbacks look awful so far this season, requiring consecutive fourth quarter comebacks against perennial football power houses Western Illinois, and ULL Monroe. For this weekend’s matchup, I expect things to get brutally ugly… and don’t be surprised if Nick Saban causes Casey Dick to do his best Manuel Wright impression.

 

Get used to it Hog fans… this weekend’s prediction:

 

Alabama- 57

Arkansas- 13 (most coming against Bama’s 3rd string D)

 

Season prediction: 2-10

 

“But wait!!! We already won 2 games!”

 

That’s right, pack it up pig-sooie… you guys are done for the year. Take your beatings, but also take solace in the fact that its your own fault for running Houston Nutt (as well as any chance of anything resembling mediocrity) out of town.

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Don’t Take the Vols Lightly

Yes we all saw it… The second half collapse that disintegrated Tennessee’s hopes of riding the momentum of last year’s SEC East division championship and Outback Bowl win over Wisconsin to a 2-0 start as well as respect among the SEC crowd.

 

At least then, the thought was, “Well hey, UCLA must be pretty good”

 

Then BYU happened… to the effect of 59-0. That hurts.

 

Ok, so this isn’t Miami or Florida State… we football educated citizens of the SEC know that you can’t use past game scores like those proofs we had to do in high school geometry. The A > B, B > C, therefore A > C. Here’s what I’ve learned in Saturday School… Logic can be tossed out the window in the SEC.

 

I know that the Gators don’t give a damn how many points BYU put up on the Bruins. They only care about the task at hand. Beating their rival and getting a good start to their SEC season. The exact same can be said for Tennessee. How they played at UCLA, was less than impressive… A close game in the 4th quarter with UAB was equally as unimpressive. But these Vols will be pumped up. These are the games that matter. Don’t get down if Florida is down or playing a close game this weekend. Well, maybe if they are losing. But don’t be surprised. This is the SEC, everyone is solid. Anybody can beat anyone, anytime. Except Arkansas.

 

That said,

 

Gators- 41

Vols- 10

 

(I didn’t say it wont be a blowout, just don’t be really surprised if its not)