Sexy in the South: Power Ranking the Hottest Coeds of the SEC

Timothy RappFeatured ColumnistMay 23, 2011

Sexy in the South: Power Ranking the Hottest Coeds of the SEC

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    Sadly, the chances of losing an entire NFL season seem to be increasing by the day. But thankfully, college football lives on.

    Which means that another year of SEC dominance may be on tap. But more importantly, another season of sexy SEC coeds is assured for football fans everywhere.

    Let the NFL players take a sabbatical—with the smoking-hot SEC ladies on the following slides, we'll have plenty to keep us occupied in the fall.

    Let's take a trip to the scintillating South.

12. Mississippi State

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    I hate to burst the momentum Mississippi State created for themselves last season, having defeated Georgia, Florida and Michigan (a 52-14 trouncing in the Gator Bowl), finishing with an AP ranking of 15.

    But sadly, in the Sexy SEC Coed Power Rankings, they finish dead last.

11. Vanderbilt

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    U.S. News & World Report ranked Vanderbilt 17th in its 2011 study of universities, tied with Rice University. That makes Vanderbilt a pretty darn good school.

    It is unclear if that ranking coincides in any way, shape or form with its ranking of 11th on this slideshow.

10. Kentucky

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    We head to Kentucky, also known as the Bluegrass State.

    Here's a fun fact about Kentucky Bluegrass, from a "Letter to the Editor" that appeared in the June 3, 1993 edition of the New York Times:

    Bluegrass is not named for its leaves, which are always green without a hint of azure, anil or topaz, whether they grow on limestone, granite, sandstone or igneous substrata. The grass is named for the seed heads, which appear during the spring and summer when allowed to grow unshorn and unmolested to a natural height of two to three feet.

    An unmown field of seeding poa pratensis waving in a June breeze is unmistakably blue. If it appears otherwise, something is wrong with the eye of the beholder, and he or she should consult an ophthalmologist.

    The more you know...

Kentucky

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    When I think of Kentucky, I think of three things: horse racing, bourbon and college basketball.

    Add sexy coeds to the list.

9. Arkansas

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    Does anybody else miss the "Wildhog" days, with Darren McFadden, Felix Jones and Peyton Hillis?

    Because I sure do—that offense was so much fun to watch.

Arkansas

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    Then again, the Arkansas faithful is certainly excited at the prospect of junior running back Kniles Davis, who rushed for 1,322 yards and 13 touchdowns last year.

    Between Davis and Southern belles like the one pictures to the left, Arkansas fans have a lot to look forward to this year.

8. Ole Miss

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    Take it away, Bob.

Ole Miss

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    You know, I suspect I could be cajoled into supporting the Rebels...

7. Tennessee

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    Okay, so could somebody please explain these lyrics from Rocky Top to me?

    Once I had a girl on Rocky Top / Half bear, the other half cat / Wild as a mink, but sweet as soda-pop / I still dream about that.

    What the bleep? His girl was a bearcat? I'm pretty sure there aren't any bearcats in Tennessee.

    Or Cincinnati, for that matter.

Tennessee

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    Is it just me, or does she look a lot like Erin Andrews?

6. South Carolina

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    Some people really love football.

    Any real lover of football would know that you always hold the ball laces out, however.

South Carolina

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    I'm really into the whole "sexy woman scantily-clad in a South Carolina jersey in the bedroom" thing we have going on these past two slides.

South Carolina

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    Given her body language, I'm imagining this Southern belle is thinking the following:

    (in a southern accent) "My oh my, I sure do hope my Gamecocks rise to the occasion."

    For you, I'm sure they will.

5. Auburn

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    From the department of "totally obscure stats to point out a la Stuart Scott," the "I love AU" button this girl is wearing is the fifth button to appear on this slideshow.

    Yes, like Stuart Scott I will occasionally resort to inane statistics. But unlike Stuart Scott, I won't fawn over Magic Johnson every opportunity I get.

    Seriously, the man-love Scott sends Magic's way is starting to creep me out.

Auburn

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    So they are the Auburn Tigers, but "War Eagle" is the school's battle cry?

    Not nearly as cool as Charlie Kelly's battle cry.

Auburn

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    Sure, Auburn will miss Cam Newton and Nick Fairley this season.

    Methinks they'll find a way to get over it.

4. Alabama

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    My goodness, this Alabama beauty has really big...eyes.

    What did you think I was going to say?

Alabama

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    Strangely enough, her name is Loofah.

Alabama

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    It is possible that the jersey-dress is the greatest idea ever conceived.

    Well, that and the cheesesteak. It's too close to call.

3. Georgia

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    Take it away, Ray.

Georgia

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    Here, two Georgia beauties demonstrate the sexy version of the three-point stance.

    HIKE!

Georgia

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    Hottest.

    Fan.

    Ever.

2. LSU

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    Sigh. I miss college.

LSU

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    This girl is guaranteed to get stripped...

    Of the ball, if she doesn't cover the points. Everyone knows you'll fumble if you don't cover the points of the ball.

    What did you think I meant?

LSU

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    Here's a fun fact from LSU's Web site:

    LSU's mascot, Mike VI, is a live Bengal-Siberian Tiger mix that lives in a 15,000 square foot habitat across from Tiger Stadium.

     

LSU

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    These ladies bring out the tiger in me.

    Plus, they're grrrrrrrreat!

1. Florida

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    It gets pretty humid in Florida, which I'm assuming explains this lovely Gators' attire.

    No idiom is as truthful as "less is more."

Florida

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    Will Florida ever again have the success that the duo of Urban Meyer and Tim Tebow brought the school?

    Maybe, maybe not. But as the beauty pictured proves, the school does not lack for its share of talent.

Florida

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    A University of Florida fun fact:

    In 2006, UF became the first university in collegiate history to earn both the national men’s basketball and football titles in the same year.

    Just one more reason Gators fans can rest easy.

Florida

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    Here, this lovely Gator is apparently trying out to be the team's holder.

    There is a joke in there somewhere, but I'll let you make it for yourself.

    Oh, and LACES OUT!

     

    Be sure to hit me up on Twitter (@TRappaRT) along with the entire B/R Swagger team (@BR_Swagger)