''I'm watching the stupidest Premier League footballer ever, Jeff...he must have papier mache for brains''.
This was an amusing simile from Soccer Saturday reporter Alan McInally during a match in the Premier League at the start of this season in which our subject, Sunderland midfielder and captain Lee Cattemole, was sent off for the FIFTH time in of his fledgling career.
With modern footballers playing at an increasingly high tempo with more money at stake than ever before and a set of rules which threatens to eradicate any element of physical contact within the sport, it would be narrow-minded not to forgive Premier League players the odd mis-timed tackle, unintentionally high elbow or foul-mouthed tirade.
In fact, were the sport to become non-contact and players to be banned from any sort of remonstration or other outpouring of emotion we as armchair fans or road-weary supporters would have to endure a far lesser spectacle.
But there is competitiveness and there is nastiness.
And the two are rightfully distinguishable - thanks to the unsavoury antics of the following ten players, who are named and shamed in the following video slideshow.
As a bonus gift to you, my sadistic readers, I also include a slide documenting some of the nastiest behaviour and injuries from around the globe throughout the course of time...since the camera.
Enjoy the filthfest!