I am a genius, so I know exactly how the 2011 NFL draft will play out. You don't even need to bother watching this year because this is exactly how it will go. I guarantee it.
Like I said before, I am a genius, so I know you red-blooded males would much rather see scantly-clad women wearing college gear representing these men instead.
Some of you may ask, "But Kyle, if you're such a genius, why are you living with three other guys in a cheap apartment, driving a sun-damaged 96 Honda Accord and delivering pizzas as another part-time job to pay rent? Shouldn't you be making millions inventing something like Facebook or something?"
Ok, fine. I am just a pompous a**hole, but so is Mel Kiper Jr., and he does this for a living.
Also, can we note the irony of this slideshow? Who is living a bigger dream than the father of a son getting drafted to the NFL? Who is living a bigger nightmare than the father whose daughter is posted on the internet looking like several of these women? I don't know if a slideshow with a wider spectrum exists.
Anyways, with the first pick of the 2011 NFL draft, the Carolina Panthers select...