When scandal struck Charlie Sheen—perhaps due to his self proclaimed Adonis DNA—he did not submit to rehabilitate his life. Instead, he went on an all-out interview-blitz to defend it. Seemingly everyday, the news was peppered with the latest in the absurd drama starring Sheen.
He set a record for the quickest Twitter handle to amass one million followers, and, like a mint, Sheen coined numerous terms that have now entered the American lexicon. But when you can't even ask someone how they are doing without a response of, "Winning," it might be time to put Sheen on the back burner.
Here are eight sports stories that went from eyebrow-raising to eyelid-shutting faster than Charlie Sheen.
Tom Brady is one of the best quarterbacks in the National Football League. With his ability to read a defense and hit a receiver in stride, Brady is able to set himself apart from the rest of the league. But when he decided to grow his hair out, suddenly his manhood was in question.
Whether he looks like Justin Bieber or a European soccer player, it's hard to argue with his skills and his three Super Bowl rings.
I don't care if his hair gets as long as Clay Matthews'—I'll take Brady on my team any day.
It is hard to argue with what Brett Favre accomplished on the field; it was leaving it that became an issue.
Year after year, the Brett Favre retirement drama played out. Will he or won't he retire? Will he stay retired? Will he require a plane full of team members to fly down to his ranch to convince him to come out of retirement?
The flood of Favre news became overwhelming. But when it got to the point where we literally saw everything Favre had to offer, it was time for retirement.
A Cleveland legend, Lebron James brought hope to the Cavaliers and their fans. But when free agency hit and James had to decide where to play, a collective rage was about to overcome basketball fans everywhere.
The Decision, the TV show where James announced his talents would be traveling to south beach, might have been the worst decision of his life.
The vitriol felt towards James and the Heat continued months after the show ended. It is hard to defend the way James left Cleveland, but the uproar he caused has become deafening to the point where it's best just to tune it out.
Chad Ochocinco and Terrell Owens promised to bring life back into the Bengals' wide receiving core. But when the two superstar personalities couldn't produce, their Batman and Robin routine went from comic book hero to just plain comical.
But when the boasting on the sidelines—along with their TV show The TOcho Show—failed to translate to results on the field, it became apparent it was time to hang up the old capes. The duo helped to Bengals to a 4-12 record during the 2010 season.
In the midst of a losing streak, Miami Heat head coach Erik Spoelstra revealed that some of the players were crying in the locker room after their latest loss.
The level of play that Crygate received became absurd, and almost a parody of the reactionary media. Instead of analyzing why the Heat failed to live up to the hype, it became about how they weren't tough enough to live up to the pressure.
Even if all the Heat's players cry after every loss, it is hard to argue that a team with three of the top players in the world is weak.
Choosing to avoid a Bill Clinton-esque moment of, "I did not have sexual relations...," Tiger Woods instead decided to come clean and apologize for his transgressions. As compelling of a story as it was, after that moment, there really was not much left to talk about.
Yet the story continues to drag on—in large part due to Tiger's play on the links.
Woods would be smart to take a page out of Charlie Sheen's book. A little more Tiger and a little less Eldrick might serve him well.
After being released from the Oakland Raiders, JaMarcus Russell was arrested for allegedly drinking the drug known as Purple Drank. Russell's arrest illustrated just how far he was from being a quarterback in the NFL again, let alone a relevant one. Any talk of Russell as a quarterback from that point on became moot.
A week before Rex Ryan's Jets were to take on the New England Patriots in the playoffs, a video surfaced on the Internet featuring what looked like Ryan's wife, and sounded like Ryan's voice, in a foot fetish pornography video.
The rumor spread fast, and culminated in Patriots' receiver Wes Welker alluding to feet several times in a pregame interview. Depending on your view, the rumor either detracted or added to the intensity of the game.
Welker might have gotten in his laugh before the game, but it was Ryan who was laughing afterwards. The Jets were able to put the best foot forward and defeat the Patriots 28-21.